Transcript Slide 1

Bouncing Back:
The Neuroscience of Resilience
and Well-Being
San Leandro Public Library
July 10, 2014
Bouncing Back
The Neuroscience of Resilience
and Well-Being
Linda Graham, MFT
[email protected]
www.lindagraham-mft.net
415-924-7765
All the world is full of suffering.
It is also full of overcoming.
- Helen Keller
Suffering
 External stressors
 Internal stressors
 Stress response
 Survival responses
 Fight-flight-freeze-appease
 Shut down, numb out, collapse
Resilience
 Hardiness
 Coping
 Flexibility
Hardiness
 Capacities to last, to endure
 Capacities to persevere, to follow through
 Capacities of determination and grit
Coping
 Face and deal with disappointments,
difficulties, even disasters
 Bounce back from troubles, from adversity,
from the unexpected, from the truly awful
Flexibility
Adaptability, capacity to shift gears
It is not the strongest of the species that
survives, nor the most intelligent. It is the one
that is the most adaptive to change.
- Charles Darwin
Resilience
 Deal with challenges and crises
 Bounce back from adversity
 Recover our balance and equilibrium
 Find refuges and maximize resources
 Cope skillfully, flexibly, adaptively
 Shift perspectives, open to possibilities, create
options, find meaning and purpose
6 C’s of Coping
 Calm
 Compassion
 Clarity
 Connections to Resources
 Competence
 Courage
Calm
 Manage disruptive emotions
 Tolerate distress
 Down-regulate stress to return to baseline
equilibrium
Compassion
 Respond to pain and suffering with open
heart, interested mind, willingness to help
 Care, concern for problems and blocks that derail resilience
 Empathy, compassion for feelings and suffering
of self, others
 Skillful behaviors in response to difficulties and
differences
Clarity
 Focused attention on present moment
experience
 Improves cognitive functioning
 Self-awareness, self-reflection
 Shifting perspectives
 Discerning options
 Choose wise actions
Connections to Resources
 People, Places Practices
 Counter-balance brain’s negativity bias
 Strengthen inner secure base
 Access resources
Competence
 Empowerment and mastery from changing old
coping strategies, learning new ones
 Embodying, “I am somebody who CAN do
this.”
Courage
 Using signal anxiety as cue to:
 Try something new
 Take risks
 Persevere to achieve goals
The field of neuroscience is so new,
we must be comfortable not only
venturing into the unknown
but into error.
- Richard Mendius, M.D.
Neuroscience of Resilience
 Neuroscience technology is 20 years old
 Meditation increases impulse control; shifts
mood and perspective; promotes health
 Oxytocin can calm a panic attack in less than a
minute
 Kindness and comfort, early on, protects
against later stress, trauma, psychopathology
Neuroplasticity
 Growing new neurons
 Strengthening synaptic connections
 Myelinating pathways – faster processing
 Creating and altering brain structure and
circuitry
 Organizing and re-organizing functions of brain
structures
The brain is shaped by experience. And because
we have a choice about what experiences we
want to use to shape our brain, we have a
responsibility to choose the experiences that
will shape the brain toward the wise and the
wholesome.
- Richard J. Davidson, PhD
Evolutionary legacy
Genetic templates
Family of origin conditioning
Norms-expectations of culture-society
Who we are and how we cope….
…is not our fault.
- Paul Gilbert, The Compassionate Mind
 Given neuroplasticity
 And choices of self-directed neuroplasticity
 Who we are and how we cope…
 …is our responsibility

- Paul Gilbert, The Compassionate Mind
Practices to Accelerate Brain Change
 Presence – primes receptivity of brain
 Intention/choice – activates plasticity
 Perseverance – creates and installs change
Mechanisms of Brain Change
 Conditioning
 New Conditioning
 Re-Conditioning
 De-Conditioning
Conditioning
 Experience causes neurons to fire
 Repeated experiences, repeated neural firings
 Neurons that fire together wire together
 Strengthen synaptic connections
 Connections stabilize into neural pathways
 Conditioning is neutral, wires positive and
negative
Pre-Frontal Cortex
 Development kindled in relationships
 Executive center of higher brain
 Evolved most recently – makes us human
 Matures the latest – 25 years of age
 Most integrative structure of brain
 Evolutionary masterpiece
 CEO of resilience
Functions of Pre-Frontal Cortex
 Regulate body and nervous system
 Quell fear response of amygdala
 Manage emotions
 Attunement – felt sense of feelings
 Empathy – making sense of expereince
 Insight and self-knowing
 Response flexibility
New Conditioning
 Choose new experiences
 Gratitude practice, listening skills, focusing
attention, self-compassion, self-acceptance
 Create new learning, new memory
 Encode new wiring
 Install new pattern of response
Re-conditioning
 Memory de-consolidation - re-consolidation
 “Light up” neural networks
 Juxtapose old negative with new positive
 Neurons fall apart and rewire
 New rewires old
Modes of Processing
 Focused
 Tasks and details
 Self-referential
 New conditioning and re-conditioning
 De-focused
 Default network
 Mental play space
 De-conditioning
De-Conditioning
 De-focusing
 Loosens grip
 Creates mental play space
 Plane of open possibilities
 Social self; process social interactions
 New insights, new behaviors
 PFC toggles; integrates
Mindfulness and Empathy
Awareness of what’s happening
(and our reactions to what’s happening)
Acceptance of what’s happening
(and our reactions to what’s happening)
Attention circuit and resonance circuit
Two most powerful agents of brain change known to
science
Integration
 Reflection
 See clearly
 Resonance
 Embrace wholeheartedly
 May I meet this moment fully;
 May I meet it as a friend.
Calm
 Manage disruptive emotions
 Tolerate distress
 Down-regulate stress to return to baseline
equilibrium
Keep Calm and Carry On
Serenity is not freedom from the storm
but peace amidst the storm.
- author unknown
Window of Tolerance
 SNS – explore, play, create, produce…. OR
Fight-flight-freeze
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Baseline physiological equilibrium
Calm and relaxed, engaged and alert
WINDOW OF TOLERANCE
Relational and resilient
Equanimity
 PNS – inner peace, serenity…. OR
Numb out, collapse
Hand on the Heart
 Touch – oxytocin – safety and trust
 Deep breathing – parasympathetic
 Breathing ease into heart center
 Brakes on survival responses
 Coherent heart rate
 Being loved and cherished
 Oxytocin – direct and immediate antidote to
stress hormone cortisol
Oxytocin
 Hormone of safety and trust, bonding and
belonging, calm and connect
 Brain’s direct and immediate antidote to stress
hormone cortisol
 Can pre-empt stress response altogether
 A single exposure to oxytocin can create a
lifelong change in the brain – Sue Carter, PhD
Touch
 Hand on heart, hand on cheek
 Head rubs, foot rubs
 Massage back of neck
 Hold thumb as “inner child”
 Hugs – 20 second full bodied
Calm through the Body
 Hand on the Heart
 Body Scan
 Progressive Muscle Relaxation
 Movement Opposite
Calm – Friendly Body Scan
 Awareness
 Breathing gently into tension
 Hello! and gratitude
 Release tension, reduce trauma
Progressive Muscle Relaxation
 Body cannot be tense and relaxed at the
same time
 Tense for 7 seconds, relax for 15
 Focused attention calms the mind
Calm through Movement
 Body inhabits posture of difficult emotion (40
seconds
 Body moves into opposite posture (40 seconds)
 Body returns to first posture (20 seconds)
 Body returns to second posture (20 seconds)
 Body finds posture in the middle (30 seconds
 Reflect on experience
 “Power posing” – Amy Cuddy TED talk
Compassion
 Respond to pain and suffering with open
heart, interested mind, willingness to help
 Care, concern for problems and stressors that
de-rail resilience
 Empathy, compassion for feelings and suffering
of self, others
 Skillful behaviors in response to difficulties and
differences
Self-Compassion
 Threat-protection system
 Cortisol driven
 Pleasure-reward system
 Dopamine driven
 Caregiving-soothing-comfort system
 Oxytocin driven
 Paul Gilbert, The Compassionate Mind
Self-Compassion
 Powerful and immediate antidote to self-
criticism, self-loathing
 Practice not to feel better but because we feel
bad
 Putting own oxygen mask on first when other
people are not around
 Come into loving connected presence
 Compassion leads to calm leads to clarity
Compassion for Others - Self
 Remember moment of compassion and care
for another
 Evoke felt sense of compassion in your body
 When flow of compassion is steady…
 Place yourself in flow of compassion, care,
concern
Self-Compassion Break
 Notice-recognize: this is a moment of suffering
 Ouch! This hurts! This is hard!
 Pause, breathe, hand on heart or cheek
 Oh sweetheart!
 Self-empathy
 I care about my own suffering, me as experiencer
 Drop into calm; hold moment with awareness;
breathe in compassion and care
 May I meet this moment fully; may I meet it as a
friend
Self-Compassion Break, cont.
 My pain is the pain; I’m not the only one
 Kindness to self: May I be safe; May I be peaceful;
May I be free of fear; May I be free of shame; May
I accept myself just as I am; May I know this, too,
will pass; May I know I can be skillful here
 Choose wisely: re-direct, shift the channel;
practice gratitude, metta; share pain with caring
other; notice coping and easing of suffering
Clarity
 Focused attention on present moment
experience
 Improves cognitive functioning
 Self-awareness, self-reflection
 Shifting perspectives
 Discerning options
 Choose wise actions
Mindfulness
Focused attention on
present moment experience
without judgment or resistance.
- Jon Kabat-Zinn
Mindfulness
 Pause, become present
 Notice and name
 Step back, dis-entangle, reflect
 Catch the moment; make a choice
 Shift perspectives; shift states
 Discern options
 Choose wisely – let go of unwholesome,
cultivate wholesome
Notice and Name
 Increasingly complex objects of awareness
 Sensations as sensations
 Thoughts as thoughts
 Patterns of thoughts as patterns of thoughts
 Cascades of emotions as cascades of emotions
 States of mind as states of mind
 Belief systems and identities as belief systems
 Awareness itself – vast sky storms pass through
Between a stimulus and a response there is a
space. In that space is our power to choose
our response. In our response lies our growth
and our freedom. The last of human freedoms
is to choose one’s attitude in any given set of
circumstances.
- Viktor Frankl, Austrian psychiatrist, survivor
of Auschwitz
Autobiography in Five Short
Chapters – Portia Nelson
I
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost…I am helpless
It isn’t my fault.
It takes me forever to find a way out.
II
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I’m in the same place
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
III
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit
My eyes are open,
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
IV
I walk down the same street
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
V
I walk down another street.
-Portia Nelson
Anything is a Cue to Practice
 Notice any moment of contraction
 Use contraction as cue to:
 Step back, come to center
 Use practice to come to equilibrium
 Discern options, choose wisely
Modes of Processing
 Focused
 Tasks and details
 Self-referential
 New conditioning and re-conditioning
 De-focused
 Default network
 Mental play space
 De-conditioning
Mindfulness Dissolves
the Stuff of “Self”
 Quantum physics investigates matter
 Matter is more space than stuff
 Mindfulness investigates “I”
 Self is not static or fixed; is ever-changing, ever-unfolding
 True Self is flow of beingness
Rest in Simply Being
 Awareness of Awareness
 Insights, epiphanies, revelations
Wisdom teaches me I am nothing.
Love teaches me I am everything.
Between the two, my life flows.
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- Sri Nisargadatta
Pre-Frontal Cortex
 Toggles back and forth between focused and
defocused modes of processing
 Integration of two modes; integration of right
and left hemispheres, integration of higher
and lower brain
 Deeper brain functioning; brain itself more
reslient
Connections to Resources
 People, Places Practices
 Counter-balance brain’s negativity bias
 Strengthen inner secure base
 Access resources
Connections to Resources
 People
 Love guards the heart from the abyss. - Mozart
 Places
 …I rest in the grace of the world…. – Berry
 Practices
 As an irrigator guides water to his field, as an
archer aims an arrow, as a carpenter carves wood,
the wise shape their lives. - Buddha
Human Brain:
Evolutionary Masterpiece
 100 billion neurons
 Each neuron contains the entire human genome
 Neurons “fire” hundreds of time per second
 Neurons connect to 5,000-7,000 other neurons
 Trillions of synaptic connections
 As many connections in single cubic centimeter of
brain tissue as stars in Milky Way galaxy
Sleep
 Housekeeping
 Reset nervous system
 Consolidate learning
 Take mental breaks
Take Mental Breaks
 Focus on something else (positive is good)
 Talk to someone else (resonant is good)
 Move-walk somewhere else (nature is good)
 Every 90 minutes; avoid adrenal fatigue
Nutrition
 Less Caffeine
 Less Sugar
 More Protein
 More Water
Nutrition
 Less Caffeine
 Less Sugar
 More Protein
 More Water
Movement - Exercise
 Oxygen – brain is 2% of body weight, uses 20%
of body’s oxygen
 Endorphins – feel good hormones, brighten
the mind
 Brain-Derived Neurotrophic Factor (BDNF) grow new brain cells, will migrate to where
needed
Laughter
 Increases oxygen and blood flow, reduces risk of
heart disease and stroke
 Releases endorphins – body’s natural pain killer
 Reduces stress hormone cortisol, lowers blood
pressure
 Triggers catecholamines, heightens alertness in
brain
 Releases tension in body, balances nervous
system
Laughter
 Promotes work productivity
 Reduces stress
 Promotes creativity and problem-solving
 Reduces mistakes, increases efficiency
Promotes group cohesion
 Promotes learning (through play)
 Eases loss, grief, trauma
Laughter Yoga
 Let yourself laugh for 5-15 minutes,
 Gently at first, then relaxing into a deep belly
laugh
 Happy baby pose (dead bug pose)
 Lying on the floor with your head in someone
else’s lap; someone else’s head in your lap
Learn Something New
 Speak a foreign language
 Play a musical instrument
 Juggle
 Play chess
 Crossword puzzles when you don’t know the
words
Hanging Out with Healthy Brains
 Brain is social organ; matures and learns best
in interactions with other brains
 Social engagement regulates nervous system
 Resonant interactions prime the brain’s
neuroplasticity; promotes learning and growth
Positive Emotions-Behaviors
 Brain hard-wired to notice and remember
negative and intense more than positive and
subtle; “negativity bias,” how we survive as
individuals and as a species
 Leads to tendency to avoid experience
 Positive emotions activate “left shift,” brain is
more open to approaching experience,
learning, and action
Positive Emotions
Gratitude
Awe
Generosity
Compassion
Delight
Serenity
Love
Curiosity
Kindness
Joy
Trust
Positive Emotions
 Less stress, anxiety, depression, loneliness
 More friendships, social support, collaboration
 Shift in perspectives, more optimism
 More creativity, productivity
 Better health, better sleep
 Live on average 7-9 years longer
 Resilience is direct outcome
A hundred times every day, I remind myself that
my inner and outer life depend on the labors of
other people, and that I must exert myself in
order to give in the same measure as I have
received and am still receiving.
- Albert Einstein
Gratitude
 2-minute free write
 Gratitude journal
 Gratitude buddy
 Carry love and appreciation in your wallet
Take in the Good
 Notice: in the moment or in memory
 Enrich: the intensity, duration, novelty,
personal relevance, multi-modality
 Absorb: savor 10-20-30 seconds, felt sense in
body
Circle of Support
 Call to mind people who have been supportive
of you; who have “had your back”
 Currently, in the past, in imagination
 Imagine them gathered around you, or behind
you, lending you their faith in you, and their
strengths in coping
 Imagine your circle of support present with
you as you face difficult people or situations
Positivity Portfolio
 Ask 10 friends to send cards or e-mails
expressing appreciation of you
 Assemble phrases on piece of paper
 Tape to bathroom mirror or computer monitor,
carry in wallet or purse
 Read phrases 3 times a day for 30 days
 Savor and appreciate
Shifting Perspectives in Nature
 BELLY BOTANY
 Find a one square foot patch of earth.
Observe for two minutes.
 (light and shadow, movement and stillness,
beauty and decay, life and death)
 Shift your view to the larger landscape, all the
way to the horizon.
 Reflect on shift in perspective.
People as Resources
At times our own light goes out and is rekindled
by the spark from another person.
Each of us has cause to think with deep
gratitude of those who have lighted the flame
within us.
- Albert Schweitzer
True Other to True Self
The roots of resilience are to be found in the felt
sense of being held in the mind and heart of an
empathic, attuned, and self-possessed other.
- Diana Fosha, PhD
To see and be seen: that is the questions, and
that is the answer.
- Ken Benau, PhD
Ah, the comfort,
The inexpressible comfort
Of feeling safe with a person.
Having neither to weigh out thoughts
Nor words,
But pouring them all right out, just as they are,
Chaff and grain together;
Certain that a faithful hand
Will take them and sift them;
Keeping what is worth keeping and,
With the breath of kindness,
Blow the rest away.
- Dinah Craik
Seeing Ourselves as Others See Us
 Imagine sitting across from someone who
loves you unconditionally
 Imagine switching places with them; see
yourself as they see you; feel why they love
you and delight in you; take in the good
 Imagine being yourself again; taking in the love
and affection coming to you; savor and absorb.
The Guest House - Rumi
This being human is a guest-house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
Some momentary awareness come
As an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you
out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
- Rumi
Shame De-Rails Resilience
Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience
of believing we are flawed and therefore
unworthy of acceptance and belonging.
Shame erodes the part of ourselves that believes
we are capable of change. We cannot change and
grow when we are in shame, and we can’t use
shame to change ourselves or others.
- Brene Brown, PhD
Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding
place.
- Zora Neale Hurston
Love guards the heart from the abyss.
- Mozart
Just that action of paying attention to ourselves,
that I care enough about myself, that I am
worthy enough to pay attention to, starts to
unlock some of those deep beliefs of
unworthiness at a deeper level in the brain.
- Elisha Goldstein
Reconditioning
 Memory de-consolidation – re-consolidation
 “Light up” neural networks of problematic memory
 Cause neural networks to fall apart temporarily and
instantly rewire by:
 Juxtaposing positive memory that directly contradicts
or disconfirms;
 Focused attention on juxtaposition of both memories
held in simultaneous dual awareness
 Causes the falling apart and the rewiring
Reconditioning
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Anchor in present moment awareness
Resource with acceptance and goodness
Start with small negative memory
“Light up the networks”
Evoke positive memory that contradicts or disconfirms
Simultaneous dual awareness (or toggle)
Refresh and strengthen positive
Let go of negative
Rest in, savor positive
Reflect on shifts in perspective
Wished for Outcome
 Evoke memory of what did happen
 Imagine new behaviors, new players, new
resolution
 Hold new outcome in awareness,
strengthening and refreshing
 Notice shift in perspective of experience, of
self
Relational Intelligence
 Setting limits and boundaries
 Negotiating change
 Resolving conflicts
 Repairing ruptures
 Forgiveness
Competence
 Empowerment and mastery from changing old
coping strategies, learning new ones
 Embodying, “I am somebody who CAN do
this.”
You can’t stop the waves,
But you can learn to surf.
-Jon Kabat-Zinn
As an irrigator guides water to his field, as an
archer aims an arrow, as a carpenter carves
wood, the wise shape their lives.
- Buddha
Competence
 Bodily felt sense of “Sure I can!”
 Based on previous competence
 No matter what, no matter how small
 Ownership
Learning Model
 Unconscious Incompetence
 Conscious Incompetence
 Conscious Competence
 Unconscious Competence
Find the Gift in the Mistake
 Regrettable Moment – Teachable Moment
 What’s Right with this Wrong?
 What’s the Lesson?
 What’s the Cue to Act Differently?
 Find the Gift in the Mistake
Coherent Narrative
 This is what happened.
 This is what I did.
 This has been the cost.
 This is what I learned.
 This is what I would do differently going
forward.
I am no longer afraid of storms,
For I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott
In every community, there is work to be done.
In every nation, there are wounds to heal.
In every heart, there is the power to do it.
- Marianne Williamson
Courage
 Using signal anxiety as cue to:
 Try something new
 Take risks
 Persevere to achieve goals
Courage
It’s as wrong to deny the possible
As it is to deny the problem.
- Dennis Seleeby
Courage
A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships
are for.
- Grace Hopper
Yes, risk-taking is inherently failure-prone.
Otherwise, it would be called sure thing-taking
- Tim McMahon
Do One Scary Thing a Day
 Venture into New or Unknown
 Somatic marker of “Uh, oh”
 Dopamine disrupted
 Cross threshold into new
 Satisfaction, mastery
 Dopamine restored
Bouncing Back
The Neuroscience of Resilience and
Well-Being
Linda Graham, MFT
[email protected]
www.lindagraham-mft.net
415-924-7765