Transcript Dealing with Conflict

DEALING WITH
CONFLICT
Agent Jeffery Shall
Agent Michael Nielsen
any similarities with the
Homeland Security Alert System
is intentionally accidental
“Five Levels of Conflict” used by permission of
Resources for Resolving Conflict
LOW – Low Risk of Conflict
GUARDED – General Risk of Conflict
ELEVATED – Significant Risk of Conflict
HIGH – High Risk of Conflict
SEVERE – Severe Risk of Conflict
LOW – Low Risk of Conflict
“We have a problem to solve.”
•Individuals talk to each other.
•Information is shared openly and honestly.
•Feelings are owned and cared for.
•The other person’s views are respected.
•Differences are negotiated.
GUARDED – General Risk of Conflict
“We have a definite disagreement.”
•Individuals talk to “friends” about the problem.
•Information is vague, unclear and partial.
•Feelings are guarded and often denied.
•The other person’s views are trivialized.
•Differences are debated.
ELEVATED – Significant Risk of Conflict
“We have a contest to win.”
•Individuals choose sides & seek supporters.
•Information becomes distorted and one-sided.
•Feelings become tense and justified.
•The other person’s views are rejected.
•Differences are distorted.
HIGH – High Risk of Conflict
“It’s Time to Fight – or Flee”
•Individuals warn of serious consequences if…
•Information is spiritualized into “good” and “evil”.
•Feelings become frozen or hysterical.
•The other person’s views are attacked as sinful.
•Differences are seen as absolutes.
SEVERE – Severe Risk of Conflict
“It’s Time to ‘Die’ Right.”
•Individuals threaten and refuse to leave.
•Information gets into ideology,
with opponents seen as “satans.”
•Feelings become non-entities.
•The other person’s views must be destroyed.
•Differences become the target of “holy war.”
Intra-
Interpersonal
group
Extra-
To Whom Conflict Can Occur
money, meetings, religious, gender,
technology, values, staff,
knowledge, roommate(s), romantic
relationship, parental, class, work,
sports, group project, professor,
supervisor, commitments, time, floor,
apartment, street, hallway,
bathroom, lunch line, etc., etc., etc.
Intra-
Inter-
Extra-
Personal/group
Where Conflict Can Occur
Conflict forces us to make a choice.
Be Ready...
Don’t be afraid…
TO MEDIATE!
When Conflict Occurs
Why Should We Mediate?
•To provide structure and focus
•To find a compromise
•To diffuse a situation
•Communication can calm us down
•To stop violence and increase the peace
•The issue can be resolved
•To end an argument
Why Mediate Conflict
Keys to making mediation work for you
•Must be voluntary.
Don’t force anyone to meet with you
•Everyone involved must be honest and
express their sincere feelings
•Desire to find the best situation
for all parties involved
•Sarcasm, insults, name-calling, bullying, and
obscenities should not be used
Keys to Mediating Conflict
Mediator’s Role in Conflicts
•Setting Rules for the Mediation
•Problem Definition
•Commitment
•Highlighting Issues and Behaviors
•Negotiation
•Contracting
•Follow-up
Mediator’s Role in Conflict
Strategies while resolving conflict
•Never take sides
•Get all of the conflicts on the table
•Be aware of all the barriers to conflict resolution
•Do not escalate conflicts by involving more people
than necessary
•Don’t be afraid to ask for help
•Always remember duct tape and bottled water
Strategies to Mediating Conflict
End Game
•Schedule follow up meeting
•Informally “check-in”
•Ensure confidentiality
•Notify other staff as needed
•Make sure you and the conflict mediatees
have a written copy of agreements
•Document mediation process
Mediating Conflict – Wrap Up
The End