Transcript Sodekso Saves
Slide 1
The Sodekso Poop Chronicle
Two Hawk Meals
“NEWS FRESH OFF THE FLOOR”
30 Apr 98
Sodekso Security Tightened
Cafeteria Adds “Iron Fist” to
Students’ Menu
Sodekso Manager Reminds
Students of Food Mission
Since the end of the Fall 1997
semester, many changes have
been apparent in the cafeteria-one of which is the addition of a
hungry mouth with a shiny gold
badge. A single security guard
was hired to eat with students to
ensure that both cafeteria food
and supposed illegal working
aliens stay behind the counter
where they belong!
Before the guard was hired, a
lot of concern brewed over the
amount of food being removed
from the cafeteria and the
number of “no habla ingles”
from cafeteria workers. ITT
responded by instituting the
security to reduce the food flow,
keep the workers in, and show
students that even the ITT staff
eats cafeteria food.
“Since murder is under
control on campus, we have to
shift our focus to preventing
food outflow, mass-ticketing of
both registered and unregistered
vehicles, activating our flashers
to run red lights, and taking 45
minutes for shift changes,”
comments Mr. Mike, the
cafeteria security officer.
Says the manager,
“Students don’t understand.
The mission of Sodekso is not
to provide quality food--it’s to
make sure no one gets in to
the cafeteria without a valid
I.D.!!
Mr. Mike
Cafeteria Security Officer
“I’m so sick of students
telling me they don’t have
their IDs and taking food
out, that I’m going to teach
them all a big lesson!
While I can’t comment on
the nationality of our
workers, let me assure you
that we run on a schedule
here: play nice and let
students take out food when
parents are here during OWeek and when it’s over,
institute the security and prevent
the food outflow starting eight
o’clock, day one!”
“When students see that ITT
badge, I know they will show the
utmost respect for the law and
leave the food where it belongs!”
Students Respond to
Iron Mike
The initial reaction to the
heightened security brought
many comments, including
“ooohh!” and “oh no!!” One
student even went so far as to
say, “look out!”
Other students have given
non-verbal feedback by cracking
pepper shakers, throwing
(initally powdered) mashed
potatoes on the ceiling, and
stacking trays on the moving
conveyer belt in hopes of a big
loud crashing sound.
Many changes have taken
place since the start of the new
food service Sodekso and more
are planned for the future. But
the one thing that has remained
constant after all this time is the
quality of the food and anal
retentiveness of the supervisor.
Slide 2
Got Milk?
Sodekso Saves $$
Sodekso Continues to Impress
Students with Rash of Milk
Shortages
Cafeteria to students:
“We love to cut corners, and it shows.”
Just when one thought the worst
thing about the food was the food, try
being out of it! It appears Sodekso
continues to impress the student body
by being out of milk at just the right
time! Says one ROTC student
(suffering from food poisoning), “I like
how every time we come in from
morning P.T. at 8 AM, that’s just the
time they run out of milk! You’d think
after 15 weeks, someone would figure
out we should have a milk supply by 8
freakin’ AM!”
Other students have given nonverbal feedback by cracking pepper
shakers, throwing (initally powdered)
mashed potatoes on the ceiling, and
stacking trays on the moving conveyer
belt in hopes of a big loud crashing
sound.
One student wept as she
commented, “I thought the justice
system was the only system that failed
me! Well I guess I was wrong-hardcore!”
Sodekso officials were quick to
respond with, “no habla!”
Every business has its
secrets for cutting costs and
saving the company money.
However, Sodekso is a little
more obvious with their
measures than others.
Just when Sodekso tells
students they should not
steal and take food out the
cafeteria, it appears Sodekso
is bringing silverware into
the cafeteria. Last week
when a student went all the
way to the check-in counter
for napkins and then back to
the grill for silverware, he
came across an unusual
looking fork.
Some students were
shocked. “I was....shocked,”
commented one. Other
students have given nonverbal feedback by cracking
pepper shakers, throwing
(initally powdered) mashed
potatoes on the ceiling, and
stacking trays on the moving
conveyer belt in hopes of a
big loud crashing sound.
Campus police officials
have responded quickly to
the situation by scrutining
the food service phone list.
Among other calls placed,
Southwest
Property of Sodekso--or is it?
Upon closer
Airlines, Delta, and
examination, the fork
ValuJet, were found on
read, “DELTA AIR
the list.
LINES.” What it means
“At this time, we’re
is uncertain but the
going to eat more nonimpact of it all was.
Sodekso donuts and
This student had
ticket more vehicles that
hopes and dreams of
have been parked in front
working for Sodekso
of the dorms for only
upon graduation. But
three minutes.”
now the company that
gave so much hope and
courage to this student
let him down--hard!
Slide 3
Proprieters
of Hate
Sodekso OJ not OK
By “A Very Sane G-Dawg”
(Greg)
Orange Juice Shortage!! (What else is new??)
By Fetus Creepa Mac (Alan A.)
Yes, you heard me, they are bad
people. They strive to create a
division in the ITT community.
They were brought here to ITT
specifically to do just this.
Sodekso is forming a rift between
the commuters and the campus
residents by pushing all campus
residents to eat in the dormatory
cafeteria. With the help of Goug
Deiger and his Nazi stormtrooper
RA's and doorguards, the
commuters are isolated within the
hub and kept well away from the
rest of the ITT community. This
conspiracy was designed at the
very top of ITT's hierarchy by the
shadowed powers that be. Its job is
to spurn the impending ITT
revolution by tearing away at its
foundation and morale. So now I
ask you to join me, help me to stop
this disaster from happening. We
need to counterstrike and take back
what is ours. First ITT, then we
will help the Scots to kill the limey
bastards that still infest their
country.
FREEDOM!!
In a stunning press
conference this week, Sodekso
announced the existence of a
shortage of Minute Maid orange
juice at ITT. When asked if the
shortage was due to the slacking
of Sodekso employees
the manager quickly snapped
back with this, "Those
accusations are completely
unfounded and untrue! Our
employees always have the
orange juice ready and people
never have to wait for it to be
replaced.
The shortage is due in large
part to the frosts that occurred in
Florida this past winter." This
newspaper failed to agree with
Sodekso managements'
assessment of the situation and
set up a hidden video camera to
see what the truth really was.
The results of this investigation
might astonish you so brace
yourselves. The video tape
revealed not only long lines for
beverages but slow response
times when Sodekso employees
were notified of the shortage.
When we tried to
confront the food
management with the results
of our investigation
amazingly none of them
were available for comment.
However many of the
Hispanic workers responded
with, "No
habla ingles?" and "No tenga
oranjanado juica!" How
many times have you gone to
one of their employees and
asked them to replace the
orange juice? We seem to
patrol it more than they do.
Perhaps we should be
paid for doing their jobs for
them, but it is the other way
around, we are paying them
to give us below par food
and beverage performance
for a high price. You can
sleep well knowing this
investigative reporter will
not give up the fight to keep
our OJ available at all times
and make sure that our
employees learn english.
Slide 4
Commentary
ITT Opinion
By Abe Rabenewicz
Question of the Week:
What has the crapeteria done for you lately?
Mr. Burns
Alumni
Food Ethics
“Eating in the
Sodekso cafeteria
has helped me to
acquire this healthy
green glow you see
about me!”
Saddam Insane
Freshman
Mental Psychology
“Those UN
inspectors will never
find my chemical
weapons! They’re
looking in the wrong
place, heh heh!
....... Uhhh...
oops.”
Jerry Sinefelt
Quitter
TV Show
“I would’ve
continued my series
TV show but the
food has caused me
to lose all desire to
live.”
Mr. Glb Sa
Student Group
Friendous Extras
“I don’t know what
happened! I just
started eating this
stuff and now I feel
more... gay (as in
happy-gay not the
other kind)!!
The Sodekso Poop Chronicle
By “A South Hall Floor”
CS460-051,055
Disclaimer: Any connection between this article and real life are probably not coincidental.
,[email protected]
The Sodekso Poop Chronicle
Two Hawk Meals
“NEWS FRESH OFF THE FLOOR”
30 Apr 98
Sodekso Security Tightened
Cafeteria Adds “Iron Fist” to
Students’ Menu
Sodekso Manager Reminds
Students of Food Mission
Since the end of the Fall 1997
semester, many changes have
been apparent in the cafeteria-one of which is the addition of a
hungry mouth with a shiny gold
badge. A single security guard
was hired to eat with students to
ensure that both cafeteria food
and supposed illegal working
aliens stay behind the counter
where they belong!
Before the guard was hired, a
lot of concern brewed over the
amount of food being removed
from the cafeteria and the
number of “no habla ingles”
from cafeteria workers. ITT
responded by instituting the
security to reduce the food flow,
keep the workers in, and show
students that even the ITT staff
eats cafeteria food.
“Since murder is under
control on campus, we have to
shift our focus to preventing
food outflow, mass-ticketing of
both registered and unregistered
vehicles, activating our flashers
to run red lights, and taking 45
minutes for shift changes,”
comments Mr. Mike, the
cafeteria security officer.
Says the manager,
“Students don’t understand.
The mission of Sodekso is not
to provide quality food--it’s to
make sure no one gets in to
the cafeteria without a valid
I.D.!!
Mr. Mike
Cafeteria Security Officer
“I’m so sick of students
telling me they don’t have
their IDs and taking food
out, that I’m going to teach
them all a big lesson!
While I can’t comment on
the nationality of our
workers, let me assure you
that we run on a schedule
here: play nice and let
students take out food when
parents are here during OWeek and when it’s over,
institute the security and prevent
the food outflow starting eight
o’clock, day one!”
“When students see that ITT
badge, I know they will show the
utmost respect for the law and
leave the food where it belongs!”
Students Respond to
Iron Mike
The initial reaction to the
heightened security brought
many comments, including
“ooohh!” and “oh no!!” One
student even went so far as to
say, “look out!”
Other students have given
non-verbal feedback by cracking
pepper shakers, throwing
(initally powdered) mashed
potatoes on the ceiling, and
stacking trays on the moving
conveyer belt in hopes of a big
loud crashing sound.
Many changes have taken
place since the start of the new
food service Sodekso and more
are planned for the future. But
the one thing that has remained
constant after all this time is the
quality of the food and anal
retentiveness of the supervisor.
Slide 2
Got Milk?
Sodekso Saves $$
Sodekso Continues to Impress
Students with Rash of Milk
Shortages
Cafeteria to students:
“We love to cut corners, and it shows.”
Just when one thought the worst
thing about the food was the food, try
being out of it! It appears Sodekso
continues to impress the student body
by being out of milk at just the right
time! Says one ROTC student
(suffering from food poisoning), “I like
how every time we come in from
morning P.T. at 8 AM, that’s just the
time they run out of milk! You’d think
after 15 weeks, someone would figure
out we should have a milk supply by 8
freakin’ AM!”
Other students have given nonverbal feedback by cracking pepper
shakers, throwing (initally powdered)
mashed potatoes on the ceiling, and
stacking trays on the moving conveyer
belt in hopes of a big loud crashing
sound.
One student wept as she
commented, “I thought the justice
system was the only system that failed
me! Well I guess I was wrong-hardcore!”
Sodekso officials were quick to
respond with, “no habla!”
Every business has its
secrets for cutting costs and
saving the company money.
However, Sodekso is a little
more obvious with their
measures than others.
Just when Sodekso tells
students they should not
steal and take food out the
cafeteria, it appears Sodekso
is bringing silverware into
the cafeteria. Last week
when a student went all the
way to the check-in counter
for napkins and then back to
the grill for silverware, he
came across an unusual
looking fork.
Some students were
shocked. “I was....shocked,”
commented one. Other
students have given nonverbal feedback by cracking
pepper shakers, throwing
(initally powdered) mashed
potatoes on the ceiling, and
stacking trays on the moving
conveyer belt in hopes of a
big loud crashing sound.
Campus police officials
have responded quickly to
the situation by scrutining
the food service phone list.
Among other calls placed,
Southwest
Property of Sodekso--or is it?
Upon closer
Airlines, Delta, and
examination, the fork
ValuJet, were found on
read, “DELTA AIR
the list.
LINES.” What it means
“At this time, we’re
is uncertain but the
going to eat more nonimpact of it all was.
Sodekso donuts and
This student had
ticket more vehicles that
hopes and dreams of
have been parked in front
working for Sodekso
of the dorms for only
upon graduation. But
three minutes.”
now the company that
gave so much hope and
courage to this student
let him down--hard!
Slide 3
Proprieters
of Hate
Sodekso OJ not OK
By “A Very Sane G-Dawg”
(Greg)
Orange Juice Shortage!! (What else is new??)
By Fetus Creepa Mac (Alan A.)
Yes, you heard me, they are bad
people. They strive to create a
division in the ITT community.
They were brought here to ITT
specifically to do just this.
Sodekso is forming a rift between
the commuters and the campus
residents by pushing all campus
residents to eat in the dormatory
cafeteria. With the help of Goug
Deiger and his Nazi stormtrooper
RA's and doorguards, the
commuters are isolated within the
hub and kept well away from the
rest of the ITT community. This
conspiracy was designed at the
very top of ITT's hierarchy by the
shadowed powers that be. Its job is
to spurn the impending ITT
revolution by tearing away at its
foundation and morale. So now I
ask you to join me, help me to stop
this disaster from happening. We
need to counterstrike and take back
what is ours. First ITT, then we
will help the Scots to kill the limey
bastards that still infest their
country.
FREEDOM!!
In a stunning press
conference this week, Sodekso
announced the existence of a
shortage of Minute Maid orange
juice at ITT. When asked if the
shortage was due to the slacking
of Sodekso employees
the manager quickly snapped
back with this, "Those
accusations are completely
unfounded and untrue! Our
employees always have the
orange juice ready and people
never have to wait for it to be
replaced.
The shortage is due in large
part to the frosts that occurred in
Florida this past winter." This
newspaper failed to agree with
Sodekso managements'
assessment of the situation and
set up a hidden video camera to
see what the truth really was.
The results of this investigation
might astonish you so brace
yourselves. The video tape
revealed not only long lines for
beverages but slow response
times when Sodekso employees
were notified of the shortage.
When we tried to
confront the food
management with the results
of our investigation
amazingly none of them
were available for comment.
However many of the
Hispanic workers responded
with, "No
habla ingles?" and "No tenga
oranjanado juica!" How
many times have you gone to
one of their employees and
asked them to replace the
orange juice? We seem to
patrol it more than they do.
Perhaps we should be
paid for doing their jobs for
them, but it is the other way
around, we are paying them
to give us below par food
and beverage performance
for a high price. You can
sleep well knowing this
investigative reporter will
not give up the fight to keep
our OJ available at all times
and make sure that our
employees learn english.
Slide 4
Commentary
ITT Opinion
By Abe Rabenewicz
Question of the Week:
What has the crapeteria done for you lately?
Mr. Burns
Alumni
Food Ethics
“Eating in the
Sodekso cafeteria
has helped me to
acquire this healthy
green glow you see
about me!”
Saddam Insane
Freshman
Mental Psychology
“Those UN
inspectors will never
find my chemical
weapons! They’re
looking in the wrong
place, heh heh!
....... Uhhh...
oops.”
Jerry Sinefelt
Quitter
TV Show
“I would’ve
continued my series
TV show but the
food has caused me
to lose all desire to
live.”
Mr. Glb Sa
Student Group
Friendous Extras
“I don’t know what
happened! I just
started eating this
stuff and now I feel
more... gay (as in
happy-gay not the
other kind)!!
The Sodekso Poop Chronicle
By “A South Hall Floor”
CS460-051,055
Disclaimer: Any connection between this article and real life are probably not coincidental.
,[email protected]