Transcript The Responsibility Of Children

The Responsibility Of Children
Parents who decide to bring children into the
world have a God-given responsibility to “raise
them up in the nurture and admonition of the
Lord” (Eph. 6:1-4).
All children come into the world innocent, pure
and safe. It is the charge of godly parenting to give
them back to the Lord and present them to society
with those characteristics intact.
Children are a blessing- not a curse! Remember
that when they have a rough day and you do too!
Children Are Blessings
Ps 127:3-5- “Lo, children are an heritage
of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is
his reward. As arrows are in the hand of
a mighty man; so are children of the
youth. Happy is the man that hath his
quiver full of them: they shall not be
ashamed, but they shall speak with the
enemies in the gate.”
Can We Raise Sinless Children?
• Prov. 22:4- “Train up a child in the way he should go
and when he is old he will not depart from it.”
• Biblically each person is responsible for their own sin at
a certain point. While our children are in our home,
we have an imperative command from God to raise
them in the way they should go. Putting that type of
godly raising in them will arm them properly to combat
error and sin (if they choose to do so). But it is their
choice when they leave the home. God was a
successful Father and a role model for all parents- but
His children (Israel) was rebellious and left Him. His
reaction to this is our model today. We are to raise our
children to be obedient to the Lord and submit to His
will.
Problems With Children
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Four Sources:
Parents bring on some of the problems
Children bring on some of the problems
Some problems originate from outside
influences
• Some are minor obstacles that every parent
deals with and is to overcome.
Parent Problems
• Lack of Love. 2 Tim. 3:2-3- “men will be lovers of
self, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers,
disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without selfcontrol, brutal, despisers of good, without natural
affection.”
• Without natural affection produces :abortions,
abandoned babies in dumpsters; Abused children;
parents who think their kids are curses; why many
children know the babysitter better than the
parents; divorce (always affects kids negatively).
Problems With Children
• Children who run the house!
• This can start when the baby comes home from
the hospital. A certain amount of change will
come naturally, but soon many parents begin to
mold their will to the will of the child.
• This kind of child whose every whim is catered to
will have his parents jumping through hoops and
will continue this throughout life and eventually
bring shame and heartache to the parents.
Parental Challenges With Children
• Unchecked Behavior causes many problems.
• All children will misbehave (Prov. 22:15- “foolishness
if bound up the heart of a child but the rod of
correction will drive it far from him.”). Occasional
challenges must be handled, but constant wringing
of the hands and uncorrected children will destroy
parents, marriages, children, the church and society.
• Sad to see children raised w/o mom and dad, but
sadder still to see them raised with parents who
never have time for them and treat them as a
bother. Do not fall prey to the quality vs. quantity
line. Children need both!
Most Dangerous Thing To A Child
• Peer influence on our children.
• As our children grow their circle of social
friendships will grow. This is normal and called
socializing. Parents are charged with teaching
kids to socialize (Luke 2:52- “the child grew in
wisdom, stature, and in favor with God and
man”). We are to educate our kids and make sure
they grow physically, spiritually and socially. This
can be challenging because it involves others. We
have the challenge to raise our children to be in
the world but not of the world.
Negative Peer Messages
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Parents are dumb and clueless.
Everyone else is doing it.
My friends parents let them do it.
Your parents are too strict.
Seeing worldly people as heroes and role models.
The Bible warns of the influence of friends (Ex. 23:2“you shall not follow the crowd to do evil”
• 1 Cor. 15:33- “be not deceived, evil companions
corrupt good morals.”
• Prov. 22:24-25- “make no friendship with an angry
man, and with a furious man do not go, lest you
learn his ways and set a snare for thy soul.”
Principles That Ease Problems
• Be a godly example to your children.
• They will see your example and commonly turn out
like us.
• If they observe laziness and lack of dedication, they
will use that pattern most likely.
• If they grow up in a messy unorganized home, do not
be surprised if they have a hard time following a plan.
• If you are materialistic and rebellious they will see
that.
• Of course, there are exceptions. Some children
observe these unfavorable traits and determine not
to do them.
• Remember you are the parent (set a good example)
You are parent first- not friend!
Clifton Rogers Poem
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I may never be as clever as my neighbor down the street;
I may never be as wealthy as some other men I meet;
I may never have the glory that some other men have had;
But I've got to be successful as a little fellow's Dad.
There are certain dreams I cherish that I'd like to see come true;
There are things I would accomplish ere my working time is through;
But the task my heart is set on is to guide a little lad,
And to make myself successful as a little fellow's Dad.
I may never come to glory; I may never gather gold;
Men may count me as a failure when my business life is told;
But if he who follows after shall be manly, I'll be glad,
For I'll know I've been successful as a little fellow's Dad.
It's the one job I dream of; it's the task I think of most;
If I'd fail that growing youngster, I'd have nothing else to boast;
For though wealth and fame I'd gather, all my future would be sad,
If I failed to be successful as that little fellow's Dad.
Love Your Children
• Titus 2:4- “older women to train younger
women to love their children…”
• Every child has a God-given right to parents
who provide: Understanding; a godly home;
food; clothing; shelter; love; companionship;
protection; discipline; boundaries and
standards of right and wrong.
• They also have a right to be taught the truth.
• Eph. 6:4- train them in the nurture and
admonition of the Lord.
What Manner Of Child
• Luke 1:66- when John the Baptist was born the
question was raised “what manner of child shall
this be”
• We may ask this of our children today. Much of
the answer depends on ancestry, environment
and genetics.
• Proper godly training can overcome all of the
above (Prov. 22:6). No guarantee, but if the will
of the child if bent early then great results can
come. Wait too long to start and you will have
pain and heartache.
Jewish & Catholic Children
• “give us a child until they are six and they will never leave
their religion.”
• They have made this claim for years. What makes this
more true than with us?
• Starting early in life laying foundations that will last, no
matter what.
• Dedication to carrying out this responsibility.
• Believing in what you are doing.
• Being committed to your task.
• 2 Tim. 3:14-15- “continue in the things you have seem
and learned knowing from whom you have learned them
and that from a child you have known the Holy Scriptures
which are able to make you wise for salvation in Christ.”
The Bible & Discipline
• Parents must discipline and be consistent and on the same
page.
• Some worldly authorities say spanking does not work- may
not be often enough, hard enough or consistent enough.
• God says spanking works!
• Pr. 13:24- He who spares the rod hates his son but he who
loves him disciplines him promptly
• Pr. 19:18- Chasten your child while there is hope and do
not set your heart on his destruction.
• Prov. 23:13,14- do not withhold correction from a child for
if you beat him with a rod he will not die. You shall beat
him with a rod and deliver his soul from hell.
• It does not harm the child if done properly. Under no
conditions should anyone physically abuse a child. There is
a difference. Children have a padded place.
Positive & Negative Discipline
• Good behaviors- good results; bad behaviors- bad
results.
• Ex. 21:15, 17- he who strikes or curses his mother or
father shall be put to death. This was old law but
the principle is the same today. Not death, but
negative consequences.
• Some behaviors are totally unacceptable.
• Pr. 15:10- Harsh discipline is for him who forsakes
the way and he who hates correction will die.
• If we do not discipline someone else will (society).
Heb. 12:9,11- if we love them we will discipline
appropriately.
Undisciplined Children
• Are Heartaches. Pr. 29:15- “the rod and rebuke
give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings
shame to his mother.”
• Any passage on training children understands
that the parents are in control. Children do not
and must not run the house. Do not build your
home around the whims of the child. The world
will not.
• Parents must be watchful of changes in their
children: styles- what they wear; music- what
they listen to; what they watch- movies, internet;
where they go; who their friends are.
• Never take their side when they are wrong.
There Will Be Problems
• But there will also be joys. Hopefully you will be
witness to them obeying the gospel and serving
the Lord faithfully in your home. You will teach
them to repent and take responsibility for their
own faults.
• After you have done all you can, there are still no
guarantees, but through much prayer, effort and
dedication to them and your home, God ways
will work in this area also.
• How we address disobedience to us and
ultimately to God will make all the difference.
Wisdom From God’s Word
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Parents do not disagree in front of children
Discuss what you will do with bad behaviors.
Do not be afraid of your own children.
Do not be more concerned with being their friend,
than you are with being their parent.
• Fathers, take responsibility and do not be afraid to
“train up your children in the nurture and
admonition of the Lord.”
• God give us armor to wear to handle our enemy,
make sure you give your kids, His armor, as well as
provide them with the armor they will need to
navigate life.
• Do not smother your kids. Take time for yourselves
LIVING CLAY
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I took a piece of plastic clay And gently fashioned it one day;
And as my fingers pressed it still, It moved and yielded to my
will.
I came again when days were past; The bit of clay was hard at
last.
The form I gave it still it bore, But I could change that form no
more.
I took a piece of living clay And gently formed it day by day,
And molded with my power and art A young child's soft and
yielding heart.
I came again when days were gone; It was a man I looked upon.
He still that early impress wore, And I could change it never
more.
-Author Unknown.