Transcript 3/19 Notes: Topic Sentences, "Venus Envy," and "Eye of the Beholder"

Topic Sentences
“Venus Envy” and “Eye of the Beholder”
Checking for Topic Sentences
• Every single body paragraph of an academic needs
to have an effective topic sentence.
• A topic sentence is a sentence at the beginning of a
paragraph that clearly states the point that the rest
of the paragraph will be about.
• For an academic essay, a topic sentence should do
one of two things:
• clearly state the reason your thesis is correct that the
paragraph will discuss
• clearly state how the ideas/stories/explanations in the
paragraph relate to the thesis
Checking for Topic Sentences
• Example Thesis: While princess toys are often touted as a
harmless part of growing up for little girls, their recent
saturation of the market is still troubling because girls have
fewer non-princess toy choices, the focus of the toys is
undeniably on appearance and beauty, and princess toys
help to support rigid gender norms.
• Some Example Topic Sentences that relate to this thesis:
• If princess toys were one choice among many, that would be one
thing, but the overwhelming abundance of princess products takes
that choice away from young girls. (The rest of this paragraph might
discuss statistics that the student has gathered about princess vs
non-princess toys for girls. It also might compare the choices in the
“girls” section of the toy aisle to the “boys” section. This sentence
connects this paragraph to the thesis because it makes a claim
about why the princess craze is troubling.)
Checking for Topic Sentences
• More Example Topic Sentences:
• While there are certainly still toys for little girls that are not part of
the “princess craze,” some toy lines have introduced princess
elements to compete with Disney, which further diminishes girls’
choices. (Notice that this is the SECOND paragraph about choice.
Each one of the blue reasons in the thesis might have more than
one paragraph devoted to explaining them. The rest of this
paragraph should might give examples of several “girls” toys that
were changed to make them into a princess toys, and discuss the
specific reasons and implications that surround each change.)
• Princess merchandise places a great value on outward appearance,
and there are princess products available to help little girls “feel
pretty” as well, and this encourages girls’ imaginative play to
revolve around achieving a certain standard of beauty. (The rest of
this paragraph should further explain how the products value
outward appearance, give examples of the toys that help girls “feel
pretty” and explain why it’s a problem for girls’ play to be centered
around achieving beauty standards. Notice how this topic sentence
relates back to the second reason in the thesis.)
Checking for Topic Sentences
• Example Topic Sentences:
• The explosion of princess toys onto the shelves of toy stores
everywhere are part of a recent trend in children’s toys that
sharply divides the “girls” toys from the “boys” toys, which is
a practice that supports socially constructed gender norms
that do more harm than good. (The rest of this paragraph
should give more evidence of this trend and support the
statement that these gender norms can be harmful to the
girls who are not comfortable with the socially constructed
ideas of what femininity should be.)
• Notice that every single one of these topic sentences:
• Relates back to the thesis in some significant way.
• Tells the reader what specific point in support of the thesis the
paragraph is going to prove.
Highlight your Thesis
• By this point in the writing process, you should
have a thesis that:
• Makes a clear claim about the issue that invites
discussion
• Makes a claim that can be supported over the course of
4-5 pages
• Is NOT a question
• Is NOT a statement of fact
• If you need to make any last minute changes to
your thesis, do so now.
Highlight the Topic Sentence of
Each Paragraph
• Does each topic sentence clearly and succinctly
state the main point of the paragraph?
• Does each topic sentence connect the paragraph
back to the thesis?
• If the answer to either of these questions is “no,”
you need to revise your topic sentence(s).
• If you realize that a paragraph covers too many
topics to be covered by one topic sentence, you
need to break up that one paragraph into several,
each with its own topic sentence.
“The Eye of the Beholder” p. 187
• This essay uses the form of a narrative, or a
story, to get its point across. Using narratives
in your essays can be an effective way of
engaging your audience. Narratives introduce
them to the story of one individual is dealing
with the issues you are writing about, making
the issues more immediate and more human.
• Why does this author decide that she is
“ugly”?
“Eye of the Beholder”
• Describe the author’s transformation at the
department store.
• What is her attitude about the women in the
photographs at the beauty counter? About the
woman who helps her with her makeover?
(These don’t stay consistent throughout the essay
because the author’s attitude changes as the
story progresses.)
• Why do you think that the author makes the
choice she does at the end?
Pop Culture and Identity
• How does this essay comment on the influence of
pop culture on identity? Would you say that pop
culture has had a positive/constructive influence,
or a negative/destructive influence?
• What do you think this essay is saying about how
all of these advertisements have influenced Suh
to think of herself as a woman?
• Is it just the advertisements, or are they working
together with other forces in Suh’s life?
Effects of Ads on Identity
• There has been a lot of talk about how ads
with unrealistic beauty standards affect
women, but not as much has been written
about how ads about how to “be a man”
affect men.
“Venus Envy” p. 168
• According to the author, how have men’s
expectations of themselves in regards to
appearance changed recently? Why? Point to
places in the article that support your answer.
• What do you think of this issue? Is this a case of
men and women being on a more “equal” playing
field now (because both “have to” be more
concerned about appearance)? Or is this a case of
a trend that has historically damaged women
also beginning to have negative effects on men?
Connections Between the Essays
• Having read about Suh’s experiences in “Eye of
the Beholder,” what connections can you
make between her day at the beauty counter
and what McLaughlin describes in “Venus
Envy”?