Transcript feedback - Emerging Business Advisory
Slide 1
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 2
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 3
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 4
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 5
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 6
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 7
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 8
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 9
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 10
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 11
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 12
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 13
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 14
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 15
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 16
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 17
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 18
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 19
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 20
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 21
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 22
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 23
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 2
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 3
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 4
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 5
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 6
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 7
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 8
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 9
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 10
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 11
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 12
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 13
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 14
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 15
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 16
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 17
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 18
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 19
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 20
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 21
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 22
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23
Slide 23
fa
1
Communicating
Conflict
Ma Chung University
Malang, 14th February 2013
Santi Djiwandono - EBA
2
do
V
Conflicts happen
3
communications components
receiver
message
channel
sender
encoder
decoder
feedback
context
4
easy to forget communication components
5
easy to forget communication components
6
easy to forget communication components
7
easy to forget communication components
distrust
external
timing
internal
8
Communicate with good
skill & good will
9
Body
Language
is the management of time,
space, appearance,
posture, gesture, vocal
prosody, touch, smell, facial
expression, and eye contact
10
we’re wired this way
11
Body Language
is in the eye of the beholder
warmth & authoritative leaders
personal connection, affection, respect
open body postures,palm up hand gestures, a full
frontal body orientation, positive eye contact,
synchronized movements, head nods, head tilts, smiles
erect posture, command of physical space, purposeful
stride, firm handshake, steepling, palm down gestures
12
Body Language
not all instant impressions are accurate
they don’t consider context
find meaning in a single gestures
they don’t know the baseline
evaluate through the filter of personal biases
evaluate through the filter of cultural bias
13
Body Language - for
Leaders
successful leaders don’t memorize ‘the right’
physical gestures
aware that their body language dramatically
impacts colleagues, clients, staff
the most well-meaning behaviors will
sometimes be misinterpreted
ever alert to finding authentic ways to align
verbal and non- verbal communication
14
Listening
we will become good
listeners only when we can
acknowledge that we have a
lot to learn
15
Blocks to Effective
Listening
competition
fear
judgements
lack of time
16
QuickTime™ and a
decompressor
are needed to see this picture.
Are you really
listening?
17
Learn to Listen
recognize non-listening behaviors
focus on the speaker
paraphrase
know your own feelings
~if you listen you invite others to be open to you~
18
How
build integration &
engagement
communicate with
good skill & good will
adaptive
19
Common Ground
vision/enemies/sense of urgency
identify
learn
share
measure
20
Authentic Leaders
21
Thank you
22
Reflection Questions
When (time or circumstances) do you fail to
listen well on the job?
Think of someone in your organization who
listens well. Can you describe what he or she
does that leads you to fell heard?
What would you do to make more time for
listening at work?
23