CONSUMERISM & FACEBOOK Prudent use of Pocket Money, Mobile Phones and Social Networking on the Internet.
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Slide 1
CONSUMERISM & FACEBOOK
Prudent use of Pocket Money, Mobile Phones
and Social Networking on the Internet
Slide 2
This talk is about we being
HAPPY
and teaching our sons how to be
HAPPY!
Slide 3
Slide 4
Introduction
Slide 5
1. We
all want to be happy. You cannot
not want to be happy.
2. But
our happiness has the peculiarity
that it has to be ORDERED.
3. Order
however necessarily implies a
final end; a purpose; AN IDEAL.
Slide 6
We choose to go...
not because it is
easy, but because it
is hard; because
that goal will serve
to measure and
organize the best of
our energies and
skills…
John F. Kennedy
1917-1963
35th president of the USA
Slide 7
An ideal is
something…
greater than one's
own self. It is
something which,
by the sheer force
of its beauty and
nobility, …
Msgr. Cormac Burke
21st March 1927-?
civil lawyer, priest, canon lawyer
Slide 8
…makes a person want to get away
from himself, to forget himself, so as to
defend, to admire, to love, to serve, the
ideal. The more one loves and serves a
true ideal, the more one is ennobled, by
being drawn upwards towards it. There
are not all that many true ideals: love,
family, country, God...
Slide 9
Serve!
Give ourselves…
Maturity
Slide 10
And an adult is not
someone who can
take care of himself
– plants can do that.
An adult is one who
can take care of
others.
James Stenson
?
writer and educational consultant
Slide 11
One is mature when
they realise they can
offend or please
others and act in
consequence.
Dr. Margaret Ogola
12th June 1958 – 21st Sept 2011
medical doctor, author
Slide 12
But because you
CANNOT GIVE WHAT YOU DO NOT
HAVE,
then we first need to learn
how to own ourselves.
The powers that help us to own
ourselves are called the
VIRTUES
Slide 13
4.
The ancients grouped the myriad
of virtues under four main ones:
prudence, justice, temperance and
fortitude.
5. They
also grouped the myriad of vices
under seven main ones: pride, vanity,
avarice (greed), envy, wrath, sloth, lust
and gluttony.
Slide 14
6.
Consumerism and Facebook tend to
foster two vices that this talk will
focus on: avarice and lust.
Slide 15
Consumerism
& avarice
Slide 16
[on avarice]
Avarice is a great
unwisdom, a
philosophical
foolishness, for it
assumes that
happiness comes
from possessing…
Peter Kreeft
b. 1938/1939
professor of philosophy, author
Slide 17
[attention]
I have come more and
more to realise that it
is being unwanted that
is the worst disease
that any human being
can ever experience.
Bl. Mother Teresa
1910-1997
Foundress of the Missionaries
of Charity,
Nobel Peace Laureate 1979
Slide 18
Alexander the Great…
after conquering the
world and despairingly
complaining that there
were no more worlds to
conquer, …soon died;
but he directed that his
bare hand would hang
out of his coffin, to
show the world that you
can’t take it with you.
Alexander the Great
356-323 BC
King of Macedon
Slide 19
Practical ideas on avoiding Consumerism
Slide 20
[being vs. having]
The most important
things in life are
people.
Clifford C. Oluoch
b. 1967
teacher , author
Slide 21
1.
Common courtesy: e.g. greeting
people including auxiliary staff;
learning to say ‘please’, ‘thank you’,
‘excuse me’, ‘I’m sorry’, smiling, etc.
Slide 22
[the value of a smile]
Elizabeth's start of
joy at the Visitation
emphasizes the gift
that can be
contained in a
mere greeting,
when it comes
Pope John Paul II
from a heart full of
18 May 1920 – 2 Apr 2005
Pope, theologian, author & dramatist
God.
Slide 23
How often can the darkness of
loneliness, oppressing a soul, be
dispelled by the shining ray of a smile
and a kind word! A good word is soon
said; yet we find it difficult to utter. We
are restrained by fatigue, we are
distracted by worries, we are checked
by a feeling of coldness or selfish
indifference. Thus it happens that we
Slide 24
may pass by persons, although we know
them, without looking at their faces and
without realizing how often they are
suffering from that subtle [neglect?],
wearing sorrow which comes from
feeling ignored. A cordial word, an
affectionate gesture would be enough,
and something would at once awaken in
them: a sign of attention and courtesy
can be a breath of fresh air in the
Slide 25
stuffiness of an existence oppressed by
sadness and dejection. Mary's greeting
filled with joy the heart of her elderly
cousin Elizabeth.
Slide 26
2.
Teaching our sons to forego certain
things they have a right to, for the
sake of strengthening their will-power
and getting detached from things.
For example:
Postponing a glass of water (at a
meal) or not taking it at all;
Whenever we have a choice, taking
the worst for ourselves e.g. with
fruits in a basket, pieces of chicken
from the sufuria etc.;
Slide 27
Bearing
a bit longer with the
cold/heat;
Punctuality in following your timetable
throughout the day;
Eating more of what we don't like and
less of what we like;
Using the stairs instead of taking the
lift;
Maintaining order in my room, tools,
Slide 28
clothes, books etc.;
Avoiding looking at myself too many
times or for too long in the mirror;
Not
using
sugar,
sauces
&
condiments;
Leaving things in my room, in such a
way that the house-help has less work
to do;
And so on…
Slide 29
3.
Every several months, going through
their closet with them and discarding
items of clothing and apparel that
they have not used for over a month.
4.
Teaching them to make their
possessions last (instead of buying
new ones every so often).
Slide 30
5.
Giving them some pocket money.
Slide 31
Generally
speaking, it is a good idea to
give them some pocket money.
It
is also a good idea to give them
(from time to time) a little less pocket
money than they need.
How
much should I give? Find out
what he needs the pocket money for.
Slide 32
Teach
them to use their money for
others once in a while e.g. sadaka,
Secret Santa…
During
the holidays, make them work
for their pocket money.
Teach
them to save.
Slide 33
6.
Never arguing with your spouse in
front of your children.
Slide 34
[your own example; to
husbands]
Your path to heaven
has a name on it:
your wife’s.
St. Josemaria Escriva
1902-1975
priest, civil lawyer, canon
lawyer, Founder of Opus Dei
Slide 35
Slide 36
Facebook
and lust
Slide 37
What is the main hazard of Facebook to
our sons and to the youth in general?
It
is cheap financially,
It is expensive in time, and
Exorbitant
in morals (especially
purity).
Slide 38
And what is the magic spell that
Facebook casts on the youth?
virtual friendships (ubiquitous and
24/7),
avatars (what I’d like to be seen as vs.
what I really am)
anonymity and shamelessness.
Slide 39
Greatest among my concerns is the
apparent lopsided corruption of girls
more than boys.
Slide 40
[Aint I a Woman?]
If the first woman God
ever made was strong
enough to turn the world
upside down all alone,
these women together
ought to be able to turn
it back, and get it right
side up again! And now
they is asking to do it, the
men better let them.
Sojourner Truth
1797-1883
American abolitionist and
women's rights activist
Slide 41
If you would wish to
corrupt
a
society,
corrupt woman and
unleash her on society.
If you would wish to
improve
society,
improve woman and
unleash her on society.
Silvano Borruso
b. 13th May 1935
linguist, inventor &
philosopher
Slide 42
Practical ideas on teaching the Virtue of Purity
Slide 43
1. Take
better care of your daughters, nieces
and god-daughters! Raise them into ladies
– not women!
2.
Teach your sons to esteem women –
beginning with those in the same
household: his own mother, the househelp, his sister…
Slide 44
[on purity]
…remember …God
often withholds
from us the grace to
avoid a lesser sin
because we are in
danger of a greater
sin.
[3]
Peter Kreeft
b. 1938/1939
professor of philosophy, author
Slide 45
To avoid pride, he sometimes lets us fall
into lust, since lust is usually obvious,
undisguised, and pride is not. So to
conquer lust, we should focus less on
lust and more on pride. Only when we
are truly humble does God give us the
grace to conquer lust.
Slide 46
And what is the best way of conquering
pride?
Service to others.
Slide 47
[purity and prayer]
"Man cannot live
without joy; therefore
when he is deprived of
true spiritual joys it is
necessary that he
become addicted to
carnal pleasures.“
[4]
St. Thomas Aquinas
c. 1225 – 7 March 1274
philosopher, theologian &
author
Slide 48
…spiritual joys such as prayer, cultural
reading, philosophy, art, music, dance,
excursions, etc.
Slide 49
[on purity]
God is not a substitute
for sex, as Freud
thought; sex is often a
substitute for God. The
deepest passion of the
soul is meant for God.
When the true God
comes, the false gods
go. To conquer lust,
forget about lust and
love God.
Peter Kreeft
b. 1938/1939
professor of philosophy, author
Slide 50
"A fly never enters a boiling pot."
Slide 51
5.
Lay the axe to the root by operating
on our very thoughts.
[i.e. to form the boys on matters of
principle through correcting them,
material to read, church or
community programmes to attend
etc.]
Slide 52
6.
Realize that lust is an addiction and
treat it as such. So what is the
practical
solution
to
this
addiction/bad habit? Another (good)
habit: grace. Prayer.
7.
Do not encourage them to have one
girlfriend only that they are "going
steady" with. They should have very
many girlfriends...
Slide 53
8.
Make it clear that sex and the
preliminaries to sex (kissing, fondling,
ravishing touches, caressing) are
completely out of bounds for
unmarried people, young or old.
9.
To have the guts to break harmful
friendships (including on facebook).
Slide 54
10.
Avoid dark corners and secluded
areas. Be with people! Get at least
one friend (of the same gender) to
accompany you.
11.
TV, computers & internet connections
in open areas (never in their rooms).
Slide 55
12.
Try and watch a few of their choice
movies/series/TV programmes with
them. Teach them to flip channels /
forward when something nasty
appears. Borrow (edited) DVDs from
the School.
13.
To avoid whiling away on the internet.
Study, work, sports!
Slide 56
THE END
[email protected]
CONSUMERISM & FACEBOOK
Prudent use of Pocket Money, Mobile Phones
and Social Networking on the Internet
Slide 2
This talk is about we being
HAPPY
and teaching our sons how to be
HAPPY!
Slide 3
Slide 4
Introduction
Slide 5
1. We
all want to be happy. You cannot
not want to be happy.
2. But
our happiness has the peculiarity
that it has to be ORDERED.
3. Order
however necessarily implies a
final end; a purpose; AN IDEAL.
Slide 6
We choose to go...
not because it is
easy, but because it
is hard; because
that goal will serve
to measure and
organize the best of
our energies and
skills…
John F. Kennedy
1917-1963
35th president of the USA
Slide 7
An ideal is
something…
greater than one's
own self. It is
something which,
by the sheer force
of its beauty and
nobility, …
Msgr. Cormac Burke
21st March 1927-?
civil lawyer, priest, canon lawyer
Slide 8
…makes a person want to get away
from himself, to forget himself, so as to
defend, to admire, to love, to serve, the
ideal. The more one loves and serves a
true ideal, the more one is ennobled, by
being drawn upwards towards it. There
are not all that many true ideals: love,
family, country, God...
Slide 9
Serve!
Give ourselves…
Maturity
Slide 10
And an adult is not
someone who can
take care of himself
– plants can do that.
An adult is one who
can take care of
others.
James Stenson
?
writer and educational consultant
Slide 11
One is mature when
they realise they can
offend or please
others and act in
consequence.
Dr. Margaret Ogola
12th June 1958 – 21st Sept 2011
medical doctor, author
Slide 12
But because you
CANNOT GIVE WHAT YOU DO NOT
HAVE,
then we first need to learn
how to own ourselves.
The powers that help us to own
ourselves are called the
VIRTUES
Slide 13
4.
The ancients grouped the myriad
of virtues under four main ones:
prudence, justice, temperance and
fortitude.
5. They
also grouped the myriad of vices
under seven main ones: pride, vanity,
avarice (greed), envy, wrath, sloth, lust
and gluttony.
Slide 14
6.
Consumerism and Facebook tend to
foster two vices that this talk will
focus on: avarice and lust.
Slide 15
Consumerism
& avarice
Slide 16
[on avarice]
Avarice is a great
unwisdom, a
philosophical
foolishness, for it
assumes that
happiness comes
from possessing…
Peter Kreeft
b. 1938/1939
professor of philosophy, author
Slide 17
[attention]
I have come more and
more to realise that it
is being unwanted that
is the worst disease
that any human being
can ever experience.
Bl. Mother Teresa
1910-1997
Foundress of the Missionaries
of Charity,
Nobel Peace Laureate 1979
Slide 18
Alexander the Great…
after conquering the
world and despairingly
complaining that there
were no more worlds to
conquer, …soon died;
but he directed that his
bare hand would hang
out of his coffin, to
show the world that you
can’t take it with you.
Alexander the Great
356-323 BC
King of Macedon
Slide 19
Practical ideas on avoiding Consumerism
Slide 20
[being vs. having]
The most important
things in life are
people.
Clifford C. Oluoch
b. 1967
teacher , author
Slide 21
1.
Common courtesy: e.g. greeting
people including auxiliary staff;
learning to say ‘please’, ‘thank you’,
‘excuse me’, ‘I’m sorry’, smiling, etc.
Slide 22
[the value of a smile]
Elizabeth's start of
joy at the Visitation
emphasizes the gift
that can be
contained in a
mere greeting,
when it comes
Pope John Paul II
from a heart full of
18 May 1920 – 2 Apr 2005
Pope, theologian, author & dramatist
God.
Slide 23
How often can the darkness of
loneliness, oppressing a soul, be
dispelled by the shining ray of a smile
and a kind word! A good word is soon
said; yet we find it difficult to utter. We
are restrained by fatigue, we are
distracted by worries, we are checked
by a feeling of coldness or selfish
indifference. Thus it happens that we
Slide 24
may pass by persons, although we know
them, without looking at their faces and
without realizing how often they are
suffering from that subtle [neglect?],
wearing sorrow which comes from
feeling ignored. A cordial word, an
affectionate gesture would be enough,
and something would at once awaken in
them: a sign of attention and courtesy
can be a breath of fresh air in the
Slide 25
stuffiness of an existence oppressed by
sadness and dejection. Mary's greeting
filled with joy the heart of her elderly
cousin Elizabeth.
Slide 26
2.
Teaching our sons to forego certain
things they have a right to, for the
sake of strengthening their will-power
and getting detached from things.
For example:
Postponing a glass of water (at a
meal) or not taking it at all;
Whenever we have a choice, taking
the worst for ourselves e.g. with
fruits in a basket, pieces of chicken
from the sufuria etc.;
Slide 27
Bearing
a bit longer with the
cold/heat;
Punctuality in following your timetable
throughout the day;
Eating more of what we don't like and
less of what we like;
Using the stairs instead of taking the
lift;
Maintaining order in my room, tools,
Slide 28
clothes, books etc.;
Avoiding looking at myself too many
times or for too long in the mirror;
Not
using
sugar,
sauces
&
condiments;
Leaving things in my room, in such a
way that the house-help has less work
to do;
And so on…
Slide 29
3.
Every several months, going through
their closet with them and discarding
items of clothing and apparel that
they have not used for over a month.
4.
Teaching them to make their
possessions last (instead of buying
new ones every so often).
Slide 30
5.
Giving them some pocket money.
Slide 31
Generally
speaking, it is a good idea to
give them some pocket money.
It
is also a good idea to give them
(from time to time) a little less pocket
money than they need.
How
much should I give? Find out
what he needs the pocket money for.
Slide 32
Teach
them to use their money for
others once in a while e.g. sadaka,
Secret Santa…
During
the holidays, make them work
for their pocket money.
Teach
them to save.
Slide 33
6.
Never arguing with your spouse in
front of your children.
Slide 34
[your own example; to
husbands]
Your path to heaven
has a name on it:
your wife’s.
St. Josemaria Escriva
1902-1975
priest, civil lawyer, canon
lawyer, Founder of Opus Dei
Slide 35
Slide 36
and lust
Slide 37
What is the main hazard of Facebook to
our sons and to the youth in general?
It
is cheap financially,
It is expensive in time, and
Exorbitant
in morals (especially
purity).
Slide 38
And what is the magic spell that
Facebook casts on the youth?
virtual friendships (ubiquitous and
24/7),
avatars (what I’d like to be seen as vs.
what I really am)
anonymity and shamelessness.
Slide 39
Greatest among my concerns is the
apparent lopsided corruption of girls
more than boys.
Slide 40
[Aint I a Woman?]
If the first woman God
ever made was strong
enough to turn the world
upside down all alone,
these women together
ought to be able to turn
it back, and get it right
side up again! And now
they is asking to do it, the
men better let them.
Sojourner Truth
1797-1883
American abolitionist and
women's rights activist
Slide 41
If you would wish to
corrupt
a
society,
corrupt woman and
unleash her on society.
If you would wish to
improve
society,
improve woman and
unleash her on society.
Silvano Borruso
b. 13th May 1935
linguist, inventor &
philosopher
Slide 42
Practical ideas on teaching the Virtue of Purity
Slide 43
1. Take
better care of your daughters, nieces
and god-daughters! Raise them into ladies
– not women!
2.
Teach your sons to esteem women –
beginning with those in the same
household: his own mother, the househelp, his sister…
Slide 44
[on purity]
…remember …God
often withholds
from us the grace to
avoid a lesser sin
because we are in
danger of a greater
sin.
[3]
Peter Kreeft
b. 1938/1939
professor of philosophy, author
Slide 45
To avoid pride, he sometimes lets us fall
into lust, since lust is usually obvious,
undisguised, and pride is not. So to
conquer lust, we should focus less on
lust and more on pride. Only when we
are truly humble does God give us the
grace to conquer lust.
Slide 46
And what is the best way of conquering
pride?
Service to others.
Slide 47
[purity and prayer]
"Man cannot live
without joy; therefore
when he is deprived of
true spiritual joys it is
necessary that he
become addicted to
carnal pleasures.“
[4]
St. Thomas Aquinas
c. 1225 – 7 March 1274
philosopher, theologian &
author
Slide 48
…spiritual joys such as prayer, cultural
reading, philosophy, art, music, dance,
excursions, etc.
Slide 49
[on purity]
God is not a substitute
for sex, as Freud
thought; sex is often a
substitute for God. The
deepest passion of the
soul is meant for God.
When the true God
comes, the false gods
go. To conquer lust,
forget about lust and
love God.
Peter Kreeft
b. 1938/1939
professor of philosophy, author
Slide 50
"A fly never enters a boiling pot."
Slide 51
5.
Lay the axe to the root by operating
on our very thoughts.
[i.e. to form the boys on matters of
principle through correcting them,
material to read, church or
community programmes to attend
etc.]
Slide 52
6.
Realize that lust is an addiction and
treat it as such. So what is the
practical
solution
to
this
addiction/bad habit? Another (good)
habit: grace. Prayer.
7.
Do not encourage them to have one
girlfriend only that they are "going
steady" with. They should have very
many girlfriends...
Slide 53
8.
Make it clear that sex and the
preliminaries to sex (kissing, fondling,
ravishing touches, caressing) are
completely out of bounds for
unmarried people, young or old.
9.
To have the guts to break harmful
friendships (including on facebook).
Slide 54
10.
Avoid dark corners and secluded
areas. Be with people! Get at least
one friend (of the same gender) to
accompany you.
11.
TV, computers & internet connections
in open areas (never in their rooms).
Slide 55
12.
Try and watch a few of their choice
movies/series/TV programmes with
them. Teach them to flip channels /
forward when something nasty
appears. Borrow (edited) DVDs from
the School.
13.
To avoid whiling away on the internet.
Study, work, sports!
Slide 56
THE END
[email protected]