Transcript Conflict Resolution - Mrs. Johnson's Blog

Win-Win Solutions
 When two people Disagree on an issue.
 Quarreling and Conflicts are healthy and not signs of a
bad relationship. It is how the conflict is handled that
can be the problem.
 Many conflicts occur because of people’s different
opinions.
 How do you handle conflicts?
Conflict Personality
 When I take the other person’s rights into account
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and not my own.
Don’t express your true feelings
Always agrees
Apologetic
Avoids ignores leaves
Powerlessness
Handle Conflict by doing nothing
• Believing we have a right to have ideas and
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feelings. Standing up for our rights and still
respecting the rights of others.
Effective active listener
States limits, expectations
Decisive
Operates from choice
Eye Contact
Handle conflict by using problem solving.
 Takes their own rights into account and not the
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other person’s.
Feel that everyone should be like them.
They are never wrong.
Closed minded
Interrupts
Domineering/Bullying
Handle conflict by harming others.
 Sure you may borrow my umbrella. (passive)
 You did it wrong. (aggressive)
 When are you going to come back? (assertive)
 Get’s bumped in the hall (all 3 types)
 If each type were an animal, which would they be?
Do Responses in Study Guide
 Resolve conflicts in a
positive way.
 Done by
 looking at things from
another’s perspective
(point of view),
 trying to see their point
of view
 then looking for a
solution that meets both
underlying needs.
What do you see? What does your table partner see?
Moving or
Still?
Eskimo or Indian?
What is
This?
Young or Old
Woman?
Young or Old
Woman?
Car Sharing
Your family has one car.
You need to go to a meeting
tonight, and your Mom
needs to go grocery
shopping.
How many Solutions can
you come up with?
Cake Cutting Exercise
You are in charge of a
Birthday party for four
Children.
You have one square cake
and need to cut it in 4
equal parts. Brainstorm
with your partner how
many different ways you
could cut it.
Or,cut it in equal
layers
ETC…
The person who is negatively affected by the Problem.
What is the Owner’s responsibility?
To find a way to resolve the problem, even if he is
not the Cause of it.
 Win-Lose: The Door-Mat
 Lose-Lose: The Downward Spiral
 Win-Win: The All You Can Eat Buffet
• Assertive Techniques,
• Win-Win Attitude,
 Co-operation
• Negotiation
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Yelling,
Refusing to change or compromise
Refusing to work out the conflict
Name calling
Hitting
Walking out
Belittling
Most Passive and Aggressive Behaviors
DESTRUCTIVE COMMUNICATION!
How do you react when someone uses power to force you to do something?
Fight
Flight / Avoidance
Obedience/ Shutting Down
I will not play at tug o' war
I'd rather play at hug o' war,
Where everyone hugs
Instead of tugs
Where everyone giggles
And rolls on the rug,
Where everyone kisses
And everyone grins
And everyone cuddles
And everyone wins.
Win-Win Conflict
Resolution:
A belief that everyone can win
by co-operation and seeing
perspectives. Avoiding
competition and comparing.
Steps to a Win-Win conflict
Resolution in the study guide.
Will go into more detail on this during marriage unit.
When we are able to resolve internal and interpersonal
conflicts, Using win-win problem solving.
Every relationship will have some conflicts
at some time or other.
When we use win-win problem solving,
it strengthen the relationship.
When we don’t, it destroys it.
Follow these steps
 Give a description of the problem that respects all involved.
 Explain how conflict resolution can enable all to win, and explain
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the steps.
Include only those concerned.
Agree not to slip back to the win lose methods
Find a good time and place with no distractions.
Get something to write down ideas.
 Use I Messages to explain your own concerns, needs and
basic goals
 Use reflective listening to hear and acknowledge the other’s
needs and basic goals
 Evaluate exactly what each of your actual needs are with
the problem. List needs.
 Don’t accept sudden promises not to cause the problem
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Think of any and all possible ways to
solve the problem so that everyone will have needs met.
Evaluate later NOT NOW
Do not criticize any suggestion. Feed
back with reflective listening
Write down all ideas suggested.
 Ask “Will it work? Does it meet all the needs of both people? Are
there any problems likely?”
 Don’t accept solutions for the sake of speed
 Use reflective listening and I Messages
 Find a solutions that is mutually acceptable to both of you. .
 If agreement seems difficult, Summarize areas of agreement.
Restate needs, and look for new solutions.
 Make certain that both of you are committed to the solution
 Write this down and check all agree to it
 Refuse to remind or police the solutions
 If you want to set criteria for success, work out these now
 Get Agreement on who does what by when
 If the agreed upon solution doesn’t work, remember it is the
solution that failed, not the person, and seek for a new solution.
 Ask from time to time if the solution is working for both of you.
 Carry out agreed method. Wait to see if the conflicts seems
resolved.
•More creative in Thinking up solutions
•Take more responsibility for helping everyone
have needs met
•Feeling of mutual respect
•Love grows deeper with every conflict resolved.
 GRADING SHEET: Choose two students to evaluate
your presentation. One point for each item displayed
in your role play.
 Have them sign your paper and then Switch.