Transcript 投影片 1 - CCIC Cupertino

Where have our children Gone?
Physically, Mentally, Emotionally, Spiritually
Time: October 24th, 2008 at 8:15PM
Place: CCIC Cupertino, Sanctuary A
Agenda
•Opening Statement and Statistics
•Personal Sharing
•Personal Sharing
•Today’s Kids Struggle
•Personal Sharing
Social Hours 9:00PM – 9:30PM
Keith
Keith
Jon
Hien
Hien
TOP 10 LIST - How to be a Perfect Asian Kid (from Parents View)
10. Score a perfect 2400 on the SAT.
9. Play the piano and violin on the level of a concert performer.
8. Apply to and be accepted by 27 top colleges.
7. Go to a prestigious Ivy League university with scholarship.
6. Have four hobbies: studying, studying, violin/piano, and studying.
5. Become a Westinghouse, Presidential and eventually a Rhodes Scholar.
4. Medical schools, law school, dental school, or at least an engineering degree
3. No girl or boy friends. Don’t associate with kids with girl or boy friends.
2. Marry an Asian-American doctor and have perfect children and successful career.
1. GPA of 4.0 is considered a failure because your friends kid has a
4.3
TOP 10 LIST - How to be the Perfect Asian American Parent (View from kids)
10.Be a little more lenient on the 7:00 p.m. curfew.
9. Don't ask where the other point went when your child comes home with 99% on
his/her test.
8.Don't "ai-yah" loudly at your kid's dress habits.
7. Don't blatantly hint about the merits of Harvard, Yale, Princeton,
STANFORD
6. Don't reveal all the intimate details of your kid's life to the entire Asian community.
5. Don't ask your child, "What are you going to do with your life?" if he/she majors in a
non-science field.
4. Incorporate other phrases besides, "Did you study yet?" into your daily conversations
with your children.
3.Don't help your kids set up a date.
2. Don’t ask your kid’s friend which college will he/she attend next year.
1. Ask how I feel. Communicate. Be a friend.
Teen Alcohol
Teen Marijuana & other Drugs
NO
10%
No
33%
Marijuana and
other drugs
67%
Use Alcohol
90%
First Time alcohol use
Teen Mental Depression
NO
49%
8th grade -- 30.3%
10th grade -- 44.9%
Mental
12th
grade -- 52.8%
Depression
51%
Sexual Relationship
No
32%
Sexual
Relationship
68%
What is the chance of our kids that are




Being in the remaining 10% group that does
not drink
In the group that don’t use drug
Within the half of the group that does not
suffer mental depression
In the minority 32% group that does not
experience abuse and sexual relationship as
a teen
What can parents do?
Be less critical of academic achievements. Pay more
attention in their mental, social, and spiritual growth
Over 80% of teens stated the reason they use alcohol
and drugs is the academic pressure. More than 60%
sited achieve good grades caused them mental
depression
Be proactive and not reactive
Be Involved
We are truly blessed because we recognize the importance of
God and church in our lives.
What do high school kids seek from church?
45% - to worship or make a connection with God
42% - to better understand what I believe
34% - to spend time with close friends
34% - to get encouraged or inspired
30% - volunteer to help others.
26% - to learn about prayer
What do junior high kids seek from church?
78% - to spend time with close friends
32% - to better understand what I believe
10% - volunteer to help others
7% - to learn about prayer
CCIC Cupertino Children Program
Statistics
Current 8th grader:
2006 5th – 6th
24
2007 6th – 7th
16
2008 7th – 8th
12
Current 7th grader:
2007 5th – 6th
18
2008 6th – 7th
12
Current 6th grader:
2008 5th – 6th
12
Parents are vital to kids
Everything start at home – Family Matters
Set a Good Example
Invest Your Time – Be a Mentor
Be Involved. Be Relevant
Stay Connected with your children and their friends
Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with
all your soul and with all your strength. These
commandments that I give you today are to be upon
your hearts. Impress them on your children.
Deuteronomy 6:5-7
Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is
old he will not turn from it.
Proverb 22:6
BACKUP SLIDES
Many people believe we lose our children when they go
off to college. Perhaps we lose them physically at that
time, but the distressing reality is that we lose many of
them during their Middle School and High School
years — when they go off to college they are simply free
to acknowledge decisions they previously made.
Asian parents, especially immigrants, are statistically the
slowest to acknowledge and least prepared to help their
kids mental, emotional, social, and spiritual needs.
As families, many of us have invested tens if not
hundreds of thousands of dollars, and tens of
thousands of hours, to educate our own children
to be successful in this world. What percent of
these are addressing their social, mental,
emotional and spiritual growth?
ALCOHOL and DRUG
The average age of first alcohol use is 12 and the average
age of first drug use is 13. According to the National Institute
on Drug Abuse, 93 percent of all teenagers have some
experience with alcohol by the end of their senior year of
high school and 6 percent drink daily. Almost two-thirds of
all American young people try illicit drugs before they finish
high school. One out of sixteen seniors smokes marijuana
daily and 20 percent have done so for at least a month
sometime in their lives. A recent poll found that adolescents
listed drugs as the most important problem facing people
their age, followed by crime and violence in school and
social pressures.
Teen Mental Depression
Depression is the most common mental health disorder in the
United States among teens, and can have a serious impact on the
lives of the many teens who suffer from depression.
Statistics show that teen depression is a common problem:
About 40 percent of teens will experience teen depression
before they reach adulthood.
As many as 8.3 percent of teens suffer from depression for at
least a year at a time, compared to about 5.3 percent of the
general population.
Teen Dating and Abuse
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Teenagers and preteens endure
significant levels of different types of abuse in dating relationships
-- particularly among those who become sexually active at a young
age -- and most parents are unaware of what is going on in those
relationships.
Teen Sexual Relationship
Nationally, one-quarter of 15 year old females and 30% of 15 year
old males have had sex, compared with 66% of 18 year old
females, and 68% of 18 year old males who have had sexual
relationship. (A Statistical Portrait of Adolescent Sex,
Contraception, and Childbearing, National Campaign to Prevent
Teen Pregnancy, Washington, DC, 1998).
“All parents want to believe their child is immune to drugs and
other risky behaviors. But it’s especially difficult for immigrant
parents, including Asian American parents, who may not be as
familiar with today’s teen culture,” said John P. Walters, Director of
National Drug Control Policy. “Some parents are at a loss when it
comes to educating their kids about the dangers of marijuana. We
want parents to be aware that drug use by teens is an unfortunate
reality, and they need to play a crucial role in keeping their kids
drug-free.”
What do our youth need from us?