Transcript Be a Duck

Be a Duck LLC
Our kids...the best that they can be.

What you should know
about
BULLYING.
“A person is being bullied when he or she
is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to
negative actions on the part of one or
more other persons.”
Olweus, 1991
Three Critical components:
• Intentional
• Repetition
• Power Differential
Telling children to Stand Up to Bullies, could be very
dangerous! They need an adults help!
Bullying is about Power…
(Vaillancourt, Hymel & McDougall, 2003)
Power comes in many forms…
Physical (larger, older)
Numbers (mobbing, scapegoating)
Social (more popular, more competent)
Over time, the power imbalance between the bully and
victim becomes established
Children who are victimized are powerless to stop the
bullying on their own.
It was once thought that it was children with low self-esteem who bullied,
but on the contrary, most bullies are reported to have a high level of
social intelligence and use bullying as a strategy to maintain their
status and power!
Involvement in Bully – Victim Incidents
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8-10% - Victims
8-12% - Bullies
1-5% - Bully-victims
70-80% - Witnesses
Studies show that even the witnesses are at risk for
depression and other emotional upset due to witnessing violent
acts.
Bullying Takes Many Forms
Physical Bullying – Pushing, Spitting, shoving, hitting,
kicking, threatening with a weapon, defacing property,
stealing.
Verbal Bullying – Mocking, teasing, name calling, dirty
looks, intimidation phone calls, racist, sexist,
homophobic taunts, verbal threats, coercion, extortion.
Social Bullying – Gossiping, setting up for
embarrassment, spreading rumors, exclusion from
group, inciting hatred, racist, sexist, homophobic
alienation, setting other up to take the blame, public
humiliation
Cyber Bullying – Using email, internet or text
Craig and Pepler:
Bullying as an underground activity
52 hours of videotape from 2 schools
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Over 400 episodes of bullying
On average, once every 7 minutes on playground
Once every 15-20 minutes in classroom
Average bullying episode=37 seconds, but one
lasted 37 minutes
• Teachers intervened once in every 25 incidents (4 %
of the time)
• Peers were present about 80-85% of the episodes,
but intervened on behalf of the victim only 11% of the
time.
Long Term Consequences
Victimization
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Academic Difficulties
School truancy/avoidance
Increased absenteeism
Somatic complaints (e.g., headaches, stomachaches)
Stress-related illness, physical health problems
Low self-esteem
Depression
Social withdrawal/isolation
Social anxiety, loneliness
Suicide
Aggressive behaviour
Long Term Consequences cont.
Bullying
•Externalizing problems
•Antisocial problem behavior
•Mental health problems
•Dating aggression
•Sexual harassment
•Arrests for child/spousal abuse
•Depression
•Anxiety
•Suicide
•Delinquency and criminality
•Moral disengagement
WHY?
Three possibilities
• Psychopathology
• Part of growing up
• Human nature
Characteristics of Bullies and Victims
Bullies
• (up) externalizing problems & hyperactivity (e.g., Khatri et
al., Kumpulainen et al. 1999)
• (up )antisocial & phsically aggressive behavior (e.g., Craig,
1998)
• (down) empathy (e.g., Espelage & Mebane in press;
Funke 2003; Roberts & Morotti, 2000; Olweus 1993, 1997)
• (down) anxiety (e.g., Craig, 1998; Owleus, 1993)
Victims
• (up) depression & anxiety (e.g., Boivin et al., 2001, Craig,
1998; Olweus, 1993,1997; Sourander et al., 2000)
Psychosocial adjustment and Bullying
Generally, the psychosocial adjustment of
bullies, victims and bully-victims tends to be
poorer than those not involved in bullying
(Nansel et al., 2001)
Bullying has been associated with
• Lower extraversion scores, higher neuroticism
and psychoticism scores (Mynard & Joseph,
1997)
• Parent ratings of conduct disorder,
oppositional defiant disorder, attentions-deficit
disorder and depressive disorder for about half
of the bullies (Coolidge, DenBoar & Segal,
2004)
Why do people bully?
• Child psychopathy
•The gradual social development of
our children
•The Nature of human beings
Moral Disengagement
Student Attitudes and Beliefs
Perceptions of Victims
Some kids get bullied because the deserve it.
Most students who get bullied bring it on themselves
If certain kids didn’t whine or give in so easily, they
wouldn’t get bullied so much.
Victims should fight back.
If you refuse to fight, other kids will think you’re a loser.
Justifying Bullying
Sometimes it’s okay to bully other people.
Bullying gets grudges out in the open.
Getting bullied helps make people tougher.
Some kids need to be picked on just to teach them a lesson.
40-71% yes
37-58% yes
58-72% yes
66-70% yes
55-63% yes
16-31% yes
65-72% yes
29-44% yes
36-51% yes
Causes and Contributing Factors
to Bullying
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Child Characteristics
Family Characteristics
School Policies & Practices
Media (TV & Video Games)
Peer Group Contributions
Societal and Cultural Norms
WHAT CAN PARENTS DO?
The Role of PARENTS
If you suspect that your child is a bully or a
victim….
SERIOUSLY CONSIDER THE POSSIBILITY AND
SO SOMETHING
If you see children harassing one another
inappropriately…
DO SOMETHING
NONINTERVENTION (Doing nothing) is viewed
by children as condoning behaviour!
The Role of Parents
And don’t ever let
me catch you
bullying again
you stupid idiot!
Bullying is
wrong!!!
Serious
Self-reflection
Do we model
bullying for our
children?
What parents can do for children who bully
• Do NOT call your child a bully
(if they believe they are a bully, they’ll act like one) but
acknowledge when their behavior is considered bullying.
• Remember that your child is learning about social behavior and
how to get along with others from you as well as form others.
• Consider bullying as a teaching moment rather than just a
discipline problem and use teaching opportunities effectively.
• If your child is accused of bullying at school, consider the
possibility seriously before becoming defensive (Could it be
true?)
• Try to work with school staff to address the issue
collaboratively, with consistent messages from both sides. Find
alternatives to detentions/suspensions (Works the first time or
not at all.)
What parents can do for children
who bully
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Direct and immediate, formative consequences are necessary, but what
kind?
Provide clear message that what they are doing is bullying and is
unacceptable
Quick, immediate, no-nonsense talks work better than long
lectures
Build awareness skills, empathy, and insights
Inductive, other-centered discipline to increase empathy
Provide youth with alternatives to bullying
Teach your child appropriate (non aggressive) ways to get what
he/she wants
Re-channel bulling behavior into socially appropriate
Leadership and responsibility
Make students responsible and accountable for their behavior
Community service
Restituation self-discipline
Restorative justice practices
If the problem persists…
despite socialization efforts…
• Consider the possibility that the bullying
may be part of a larger problem with
conduct, antisocial behavior and/or ADHD,
even depression…
• Get professional help – the earlier the
better.
Do you suspect that your child is
being victimized?
They may not tell you directly. Possible warning signs:
• Avoids recess/playground before, during and/or after
school
• Arrives to school late or just at starting bell
• Appears to be alone most of the time at school
• Frequent injuries or frequent damage to clothes or
property
• Numerous lost belongings
• Sleeping all the time (or not at all)
• Somatic complaints (headaches, stomach aches, etc.)
What parents can do for children who are
victimized
• Support your child and validate his/her feelings (victimized children
often blame themselves for their treatment)
• Plan regular communication with your child to monitor events on an
ongoing basis
• Teach/Model assertiveness (not aggression) example:Safeteen
(www.safeteen.ca)
• Consider the possibility that your child is a “Provocative victim” and
teach alternative behaviors
• Document incidents, try to get the whole story
• If possible, work with the school (talk to teachers, counselors, youth
workers, administrators)
– Identify an adult at school who can support your child and who the child
can trust
– Provide a “safe haven” for your child during recess/lunch periods and
bus trips
What parents can do for children
who are victimized
• If you don’t get results at the school level, don’t
give up, contact the assistant superintendent,
the superintendent, the school board
• If talking directly with parents of perpetrators, be
objective and try to consider the whole picture
• Contact your parent association/access
community support
• If child was physically attacked, contact
police/school liaison officer
• If school interventions fail, consider switching
schools.
Be Prepared
• Your child may not want your help
• A child who has been victimized may still
seek affiliation with perpetrators despite
their treatment of him/her
Useful Websites
• Collaborative for Academic and Social and Emotional
Learning (CASEL) www.casel.org
• Promoting Relationships and Eliminating Violence Network
(PREVNet) www.prevnet.ca
• Blueprints www.colorado.edu/cspv/blueprints
• Centre for Social and Emotional Education www.csee.net
• Developmental Studies Center (Caring School Communities
Project) www.devstu.org
• Teach Safe Schools www.teachsafeschools.org
• Educators for Social Responsibility (ESR)
http://www.esrnational.org/home.htm
In conclusion, there is no conclusion to what children who are
bullied live with. They take it home with them at night. It lives
inside them and eats away at them. It never ends. So neither
should our struggle to end it.
Sarah, age 17
Information provided by:
Shelley Hymel
Faculty of Education
University of British Columbia