Transcript Preparing Children Sexually

www.amable.in
Preparing children
sexually
www.amable.in
Go around and hug
everybody in this room.
www.amable.in
What is your response?




Child playing with his genitals.
Child looks at an bra ad and ask
what is she wearing?
When watching TV with Child – an intimate kissing
scene comes up?
Your child tells you today “one child removed his
pants in the class and something was hanging out?
Why it does not hang out from my body?”

Child asks – “What is Rape”?

Child does not ask such question
www.amable.in
Beliefs
Motivation
Feelings
Empower
Self
Esteem
Habits of
mind
Creativity
Behaviour
Multiple
Intelligences
www.amable.in
Is this your response?

Scold the child?

Avoid answering?

Wish child had not asked?

Change channel / topic?
www.amable.in
So what do these
responses do to the
child?
• I am bad
• It’s wrong to discuss such things with
YOU …………… Its eembarrassing
• There is something SPECIAL about it
• You don’t want to talk about it - so WHY to
bother. Avoid/ Ignore
www.amable.in
It has to begin
with you……
www.amable.in
Sex education is more about
beliefs than actual information.
Our
Beliefs
www.amable.in
1 Give the
Vocabulary
It is not ‘something’
– it has a name:
“penis”, “vagina”
www.amable.in
2 Functions of ALL
body parts
The function of
Urination does
not make Vagina
or Penis DIRTY.
www.amable.in
3 Awareness


Public body parts v/s
Private body parts
Public and Private (body)
actions
www.amable.in
4 Sensitize
– Good touch, Bad touch
– Sexual touch
www.amable.in
Let us begin……….
Body Education
1.Give right vocabulary
2. Correct function of body parts
3. Private and public body parts
4. Private and public actions
5. Sensitize – Good touch, bad
touch
www.amable.in
Why Body Education ?
 Nothing
is dirty or bad. ALL parts of their body
are good.
 It will help make it easier for them to come to
you when they have questions.
 You be the FIRST to give them information.
Easy to talk about BODY when they grow.
 Children need to feel good about themselves,
whether they are boys or girls.
www.amable.in
Break your
own barrier
“What you believe, what you feel and
what you say, do, and ‘not do’ - will
have an impact on your
children's sexual life”
www.amable.in
So, lets see what we
can do (role play)
You find your child and his friend
(both 7 years) are naked and playing
with reach other’s body parts
www.amable.in
Sexual Behavior





- Pre Primary
Exploring private body parts.
Touch and play with them.
Interest in the physical
characteristics of the opposite sex.
Undressing with another preschooler
and ‘playing doctor’ together.
Wondering where babies come from.
Key source: Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and
society
www.amable.in
Sexual Behavior - Primary





Modest and conscious
Kissing games and marriage
pretend-play.
Babies come from?
Sex play; ‘playing doctor’
Curious about gender
differences, sexual
intercourse and pregnancy
Key source: Australian Research Centre in Sex, Health and society
www.amable.in
Puberty
Physical
Changes Girls
Physical changes – Boys
Also………..
–Emotional changes
–Your thinking will change
–Your relationship with your parents
www.amable.in
Sex Education - Socio - Emotional
 Myths
related to “How to behave
like a man and a woman”
 Boy
friends and Girl friends
 Sexual
feelings – attraction for
opposite or same sex, crushes.
 Media
stereotypes
www.amable.in
Sex education – Social
 Homo
sexuality, Premarital sex.
 Alcohol,
 Fatigue
 Violent
Smoking, Drugs
Syndrome, Depression,
media, Pornography
 Responsible
 Media
sexual behaviour
stereotypes
www.amable.in
If you are late……….
Start NOW – Talk about the
BODY education and then
move to …………
www.amable.in
Benefits




You be the FIRST to inform
You are approachable
Your family values
Healthy relationship
www.amable.in
So, lets see what we
can do (role play)
www.amable.in
So, lets see what we
can do (role play)
You child comes and tells you that a
adult relative of yours has been
fondling with his/her genitals
www.amable.in
Sexual Abuse
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
Listen – completely without any judgement
Empathize with child’s emotions
If required express your emotions
(only emotions)
Assure its not child’s mistake
State that whatever maybe you are with the
child
Ask child for opinions and options
Establish that saying NO to anybody is FINE
Discuss more options
Reiterate you are always THERE
www.amable.in
Guidelines










Check your own beliefs
Make it a regular topic
Mark it important
Be open & relaxed when talking about sex
If not, tell that child that you’re not comfortable
Don’t react - Understand the ACTION
Do not give wrong or fanciful information
Educate yourself
Use books, articles or videos, youth websites that can help.
You could suggest someone you both trust as a good person
for your son or daughter to talk with.
A hysterical response will probably guarantee your
child may never risk asking you anything about sex
again
www.amable.in
TOOLS
 Role
plays
 Puppets
 Casual Discussions
 Books
 Draw pictures
 Yoga – Body Awareness
www.amable.in
Jagriti
Remember sex is a natural and biological motivation
2. Check your own beliefs
3. Empathise with child feelings. Express yours.
4. Remember your response will determine how the child will
think about himself or herself
5. Empower the child to face sexual situations
6. Child is creative enough to create own understanding;
Be creative in how you show your points / concerns
7. Awareness then understanding. Strategies they can create
themselves.
8. Use Multiple ways to reach to the child - draw, role play,
discuss, songs, give data about abuse,
9. Sex is natural behaviour and in most cases the intention is
to enjoy oneself.
10. Prepare the child mentally, emotionally, socially and
sexually. Learn from life for life.
1.
www.amable.in
www.amable.in
Complete Sex
education
www.amable.in
Myths - Sex Education
There is an age
 Responsibility of school.
 They will undesrtand as they grow
 Sex eductaion – only means menstruation (girls), penis,
hair growth (boys) and biology of sex.
 Touching genitals is not normal – harmful for growth. It
distracts from studies.
 Talk about sex issues - kids will become sexually active.
 Its okay to say “God put baby in mummy’s tummy” –
kids will not understand the facts.
 Only mothers should talk to girls and fathers talk to
son.
 Boys do not need to know about periods and Girls do
not need to know about wet dreams.

www.amable.in
New Perspectives
 No age - Talking with your children about their bodies is
easier if you start when they are very young.
 Not only school - Home plays a major role
 Sex education is as important as maths or engilish or
sports
 Not only biology - Complete education to all the genders.
 Sex play – normal. It can be soothing.
 Talking early about sex - will help make it easier for
them to come to you when they have questions.
 They will understand - You give factual and age
appropriate information.
 Both parenst talk – bonds the family
 Well informed kids behave sexually responsibly.
www.amable.in
Sex education - 1
Body
education
Awareness - Good touch, bad
touch, sexual touch
Awareness of Abuse – physical,
emotional and sexual
Empower at home
Sexual behaviour of pre-primary
and primary children.
www.amable.in
Sex education –
Puberty
2
Changes – hormones,
feelings, body appearance
Changes with teenage – like Acne,
hair growth, skin change
Do boys have Breast?
Breast and size
www.amable.in
Sex education - 3
 Boy
friends and Girl friends
 Menstruation – When do periods starts
and stops, Accidents like blood stains,
Exercise and periods, Mood swings,
Cramps, Pimples and periods, Light and
heavy periods.
 Wet dreams, Erections, Hair and skin
 Hair
growth – shaving, waxing,
 Sexual
feelings – attraction for opposite or
same sex, crushes
www.amable.in
Sex education - 4
 Myths
related to “How to behave like a man
and a woman”
 Reproduction, Pregnancy
 Homo sexuality, Premarital sex.
 Condoms, birth control, contraception,
unplanned pregnancy, Abortion
 Sex diseases and STD (sexually transmitted
diseases), Infections like Urine infection
www.amable.in
Sex education – 5
Alcohol,
Smoking, Drugs
Fatique Syndrome, Depression,
Violent media, Pronography
Responsible sexual behaviour
www.amable.in
Skills develop






Being able to communicate,
Be aware
Decision-making
Seek help from adults - including
parents, carers and professionals.
Be able to differentiate between
accurate and inaccurate
information,
Discuss a range of moral and social
issues and perspectives on sex and
sexuality, including different
cultural attitudes and sensitive
issues like sexuality, abortion and
contraception.
www.amable.in
HOW ?
www.amable.in
How to answer?
 Think
honestly what you think about the
questions
 Check your beliefs
 Express your thought
 Give appropriate and factual information
 Ask and respect child’s opinion
“Children need most of all to feel loved and lovable”
www.amable.in
Playing Doctor - You see your
young child undressing and
playing doctor with another friend
at home.
FACTS:
 It is Natural and Normal
 Does not mean the same as it does for
adults.
 If you stop – they hide
www.amable.in
Playing Doctor - YOUR ACTION:
1.
2.
Do not act in horror or scream or punish.
Remind them about






My body – other cannot touch – only you can touch
Private and public body parts
Private and public actions
Give them options – put your clothes and play same
game (if they are playing family, doctor) or any
other game
If books are handy – read one for them
Take it easy - remind yourself it is natural
www.amable.in
Your young child likes to
touch your private body parts.
Facts: Exploration, Curious, Not a
sexual act
Your action – Role play
– My body – your body
– My feelings
– Give option
www.amable.in
Two friends taking bath together or
sleep in the night
FACTS: Enjoyment
Your Action
– Prepare them
– Awareness of My Body
– Empower to say NO
– Ask their opinion
www.amable.in
Your child playing and rubbing
genitals in the night and enjoying.
Facts: Natural, Soothing
Your Action
–Accept
–Private and Public action
–My Body
www.amable.in
How does baby come in
Mummy’s Tummy ?


Avoid fanciful explanations
Keep your answers simple.
1.
2.
3.


Baby grows in mummy’s tummy’.
Created from a sperm from their Dad and an egg from their
Mum. Grow in mummy’s organ called Utreus.
Sperm comes from Dad's penis and the egg from Mum's
ovaries.
Your own pregnancy, the pregnancy of a
friend or even pets giving birth.
Your Family Values
www.amable.in
Your young child likes to touch
your private body parts.
Facts:
Exploration, Curious, Not a sexual act
Your action – Role play
– My body – your body
– My feelings
– Give option
www.amable.in
THANK YOU
Reach us – [email protected]
Handouts - www.geniekids.com/sexeduho.html
I can only show you the way,
cannot make a way for you.
Do support our endeavour to spread
awareness about sex education by helping
us conduct these kinds of workshops in
more schools, apartment complexes and
companies.