Transcript The Truth About Dogs and Cats

Do Men and Women Show
Evidence of Reciprocal Liking
While Speed-dating?
Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel
Northwestern University
Reciprocity and Attraction (non-romantic)


Early studies: We tend to like people who
like us (Backman & Secord, 1959)
David Kenny: 2 ways to measure reciprocity
of liking



Dyadic – If I uniquely like you, do you
uniquely like me?
Generalized – Are “likers” also liked in turn?
The answer to both is typically “yes”
Reciprocity and Attraction (non-romantic)

From Kenny (1994)
Study
Generalized
Dyadic
Burleson (1983)
.27
.26
Chapdelaine, Kenny, & LaFontana (1994)
.58
.42
Kenny & Bernstein (1982)
xx
.29
Dabbs & Ruback (1987)
.36
.13
Kashy (1988)
.09
.28
Park & Flink (1989)
-.10
.18
Burleson (1983)
.12
.49
Curry & Emerson (1970)
-.26
.48
Malloy & Albright (1990)
xx
.75
Newcomb (1961)
xx
.58
Wright, Ingraham, & Blackner (1985)
.49
.74
r =.43
First Encounters: One on one
First Encounters: Groups
Long-term acquaintance
r =.32
Reciprocity and Attraction (romantic)

Participants’ recall of falling-in-love
experiences typically involve reciprocity



Ex: finding out the potential partner was
interested in you (Aron, Dutton, Aron, & Iverson 1989)
But it could still be as (or more) common that we
are uninterested in the people who like us
What about playing “hard to get”? (Walster et al.,
1973)
Romantic vs. Platonic Liking

An individual who demonstrates platonic
liking for many others is likable (Folkes & Sears,
1977)


“Likers” are typically nice people, so they are
liked in return
But an individual who demonstrates romantic
liking for many others?

This may come across as unselective or even
desperate
Hypotheses

In a purely romantic context…


Dyadic – Unique liking will be reciprocated (a
positive correlation as in previous research)
Generalized – Likers will be disliked (a negative
correlation unlike previous research)


Should correlate with measures of desperation
In other words, dyadic vs. generalized no
longer operate in the same direction
Method – Speed-dating



163 Northwestern undergraduates
Completed a 30-minute background questionnaire
online prior to the event
Met 9-13 opposite sex individuals for 4 minutes each


Completed a ~2 minute questionnaire after each date
After returning home, participants “yes” or “no” the
other participants online

“Matches” can email one another through web portal
Method – Measures (after each date)

Romantic Desire




Chemistry – My interaction partner and I…




…seemed to have a lot in common
…seemed to have similar personalities
…had a real connection
Perceived Romantic Desire



I really liked my interaction partner
I was sexually attracted to my interaction partner
I am likely to say “yes” to my interaction partner
I think that my interaction partner really liked me
I think that my interaction partner was sexually attracted to me
Perceived Unselectivity

To what percentage of the other people here today will this person
say “yes”?
Method - Measures

The Social Relations Model – actor, partner,
and relationship effects



Actor effect: Average amount Laura liked her
dates
Partner effect: Average amount Laura was liked
by her dates
Relationship effects: The amount Laura liked
each particular date independently of her actor
effect and her date’s partner effect
Results - Variance partitioning
Sex
Variable
Actor
Partner
Relationship
Desire
.09
.27
.35
Chemistry
.19
.11
.45
Perceived Desire
.25
.10
.37
Perceived Unselectivity
.37
.10
.53 – e
Desire
.16
.25
.31
Chemistry
.13
.21
.45
Perceived Desire
.26
.07
.42
Perceived Unselectivity
.34
.02
.64 – e
Men
Women
Results – Dyadic Effects
Romantic Desire (BA)
(relationship)
Chemistry (BA) Perceived Desire (BA)
(relationship)
(relationship)
Romantic Desire (AB)
(relationship) - Men
.14**
.17**
.17*
Romantic Desire (AB)
(relationship) - Women
.14**
.23***
.22**
Results – Generalized Effects
Romantic Desire
(Partner)
Chemistry
(Partner)
Perceived Desire
(Partner)
Romantic Desire
(Actor) - Men
-.42†
-.39
-.03
Romantic Desire
(Actor) - Women
-.42**
-.30†
-.12
 Assumed reciprocity (Romantic desire actor with perceived desire actor)
r = ~.33
 Generalized reciprocity correlation still negative and significant
controlling for coder-rated physical attractiveness
Mediation – Why don’t you like me?
(Because I’ll say yes to anyone!)
Unselectivity
(Partner)
β = .34***
Desire (Actor)
β = -.16*
β = -.30***
β’ = -.25**
Sobel z = 1.85, p = .065
Desire (Partner)
Results – Personality correlates
Measure
“I sometimes feel as though I would
date anyone who is interested in me”
♂ Desire ♂ Desire ♀ Desire ♀ Desire
(actor) (partner) (actor) (partner)
.23*
-.20†
.17
-.30*
Mediation – Why do I like you?
(Because I’m desperate!)
Desire (Actor)
β = .19*
Self-report
Desperation
β = -.26***
β = -.24*
β’ = -.19*
Sobel z = 1.99, p = .047
Desire (Partner)
Results – Personality correlates
Measure
♂ Desire ♂ Desire ♀ Desire ♀ Desire
(actor) (partner) (actor) (partner)
“I sometimes feel as though I would
date anyone who is interested in me”
.23*
Time since last romantic
physical contact
# sex partners in past year
.20†
-.45** -.22†
-.07
.32**
-.04
.19
-.16
.48**
.01
.12
# romantic physical contact
partners in past year
-.20†
.17
-.30*
-.27*
Results – Personality correlates
Measure
“I expect that I will be interested in
going on a date with _____% of the
people I meet speed-dating”
♂ Desire ♂ Desire ♀ Desire ♀ Desire
(actor) (partner) (actor) (partner)
.25*
-.24*
.27*
-.26*
“I expect that _____% of the people I
meet speed-dating will be interested
in going on a date with me.”
.15
-.03
-.10
.16
“Members of the opposite sex that I
like tend to like me back”
.05
.26*
-.11
.38**
Extraversion
-.10
.33**
-.09
.12
Conscientiousness
.14
-.02
-.22†
.27*
A procedural bias?




At least 3 separate teams of speed-dating researchers
have reported a large sex difference (in the male
direction) in “yessing”
But men are always the ones rotating, even at
professional speed-dating events
Could there be something empowering about
rotating that results in a higher yessing rate?
At 4 of our events, men rotated, and at 3 of the
events, women rotated
Rotation interactions
Men
Women
.60
Romantic Desire
Yessing Rate
.55
.50
.45
.40
5.6
5.2
4.8
.35
4.4
.30
4.0
Men
rotate
Women
rotate
Men
Women
6.0
Men
rotate
Women
rotate
Discussion


Found a positive dyadic reciprocity correlation (if I
uniquely like you, you tend to uniquely like me
back)
Found a negative generalized reciprocity correlation
for both men and women


Appears to be related to desperation / unselectivity
Romantic liking appears to come in one of two
“flavors”

The flavor can be determined in only 4 minutes!
Thank you









Candida Abrahamson
David Kenny
Wendi Gardner
Dan Ariely
Daniel Mochon
Jacob Matthews
George Loewenstein
The Northwestern Class
Alliance
The University
Research Grants
Committee











Layla Bermeo
Debra Blade
Christine Brooks
Bonnie Buik
Madelaine Eulich
Megan Graney
Jeff Jablons
Kristin Jones
Julie Keller
Jennifer Leyton
Kaidi Liu











Mallory Martino
Ashley Mason
Jesse Matthews
Abby Mitchell
Jennifer Rosner
Seema Saigal
Sarah Scarbeck
David Sternberg
Laura Thompson
Ashley Treadway
Stephanie Yang