Transcript Emotional Resilience – Understanding and Dealing with

Emotional Resilience –
Understanding and
Dealing with
(Cyber) Bullies
∙ Bullying is abusive treatment, the use of force or coercion to
affect others, particularly when habitual and involving an
imbalance of power.
∙ It may involve verbal harassment, physical assault or coercion
and may be directed persistently towards particular victims.
∙ The "imbalance of power" may be social power and/or
physical power. The victim of bullying is sometimes referred to
as a "target.“
∙ Bullying consists of three basic types of abuse – emotional,
verbal, and physical. It typically involves subtle methods of
coercion such as intimidation.
∙ physical contact
∙ threats of inflicting harm
∙ taking things
∙ forcing one to do a demeaning action
• Using one’s circumstances/predicament against
themselves
• Getting others to align and to ignore or torment you
• Verbal
• Continuous taunting
• Use of degrading labels in attempt to have superiority
∙ Appointed authority
∙ Financial authority
∙ Relational authority
∙ Positional authority
Cyber Bullying from youtube: Cyber
Bullying - YouTube.avi
The use of information and communication
technologies to support deliberate, repeated,
and hostile behaviour by an individual or
group, that is intended to harm others.
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Study done of 1500 students between the ages of 10 to 14
years of age:
42% have been bullied while online. One in four have had it
happen more than once.
35% have been threatened online. Nearly one in five had had
it happen more than once.
21% have received mean or threatening e-mails or other
messages.
58% admit someone has said mean or hurtful things to them
online. More than four out of ten say it has happened more
than once.
58% have not told their parents or an adult about something
mean or hurtful that happened to them online.
Source: ABC News September 2006
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43% of U.S. teens having experienced some form of
cyber-bullying in the past year.
2006 survey by Harris Interactive reported:
Similarly, a Canadian study found:
23% of middle-schoolers surveyed had been bullied by
e-mail
35% in chat rooms
41% by text messages on their cell phones
Fully 41% did not know the identity of the perpetrators.
∙ In an informal poll conducted by Touch Cyber Wellness
& Sports of 255 students from three secondary schools,
almost 35 per cent said they had been cyber-bullied in one
form or another.
∙ Esther Ng, founder of the Coalition Against Bullying for
Children & Youth, an agency that provides resources for
people to seek help on bullying issues, agreed. She cited a
2006 survey of 3,488 Singaporean students in which 25 per
cent - or 872 students - admitted to having been victimised
online.
∙ Another 31 per cent said that the online
victimisation was in addition to physical bullying
they also faced.
∙ Citing studies published by WiredSafety.org,
Poh Yeang Cherng, manager of Touch Cyber
Wellness & Sports, said:
"There are far more reports of cyber- bullying
from Singapore on a per capita basis compared to all
other countries except for the United States."
∙ Virtual anonymity
∙ Lack of immediate consequences
∙ Low accountability
∙ Better able to technologically cover-up problems
∙ Effective in penetrating geographical boundaries
∙ Effective in getting support and people to join in
(more negative attention than positive)
∙ False accusations
∙ Attempts to gather information about the victim
∙ Encouraging others to harass the victim
∙ False victimization
∙ Attacks on data and equipment
∙ Ordering goods and services
∙ Arranging to meet
Cyber Mobbing
∙ An apparent mistake in one’s life can lead to a lifetime of regret.
∙ Almost anyone can join in the activity.
∙ You are accessed 24/7 and there is very little you can do about it.
∙ Your ability to control the widespread rumour/scandal is only a
fraction of the rate in which it can spread.
∙ Reputation can be easily ruined overnight as the spread can be
viral.
∙ It is a great place for bullies to hide as they be assuming false
identities and feel safe in their cruel acts of tearing someone else
down/apart.
Flaming
∙ Flaming, also known as bashing, is hostile and insulting
interaction between Internet users. This is a strategy of
causing mischief.
∙ Deliberate flaming, as opposed to flaming as a result of
emotional discussions, is carried out by individuals known as
flamers, who are specifically motivated to incite flaming.
Their counterparts are known as trolls who are less
"professional" and write obvious and blunt remarks to incite
a flame war, as opposed to the more subtle, yet precise
flamers.
∙ Less likely to say these things in public but will do so on
the website because this is the intention of the website
∙ Five junior college students were punished for posting
offensive remarks about two teachers and a vice-principal
online.
∙ The students, all girls, were made to remove the remarks
from their Internet diaries, or blogs, and suspended for
three days last month.
∙ The case is not an isolated one. Of the 31 secondary
schools and junior colleges contacted, 18 said they were
seeing more such incidents as the number of bloggers
surges.
∙ Seven secondary schools and two JCs have asked
bloggers who criticise or insult their teachers online 'flaming' in Internet jargon - to remove the offending
remarks.
∙ Tanglin Secondary science and PE teacher Tham Kin
Loong said: 'I've had vulgarities hurled against me, my
parents and my whole family in some students' blogs.‘
∙ The 33-year-old added: 'Most of them do not realise the
legal implications of what they are writing in such a public
domain.'
Megan’s story:
Megan's Story - YouTube.avi
∙ Sexting is the act of sending sexually explicit messages
or photographs, primarily between mobile phones.
∙ 20% of teens (13-20) and 33% of young adults (20-26)
had sent nude or semi-nude photographs of themselves
electronically.
∙ Additionally, 39% of teens and 59% of young adults had
sent sexually explicit text messages.
∙ In a 2008 survey of 1,280 teenagers and young adults of
both sexes on sponsored by The National Campaign to
Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy.
∙ “Be careful what you post on Facbook. In the
youtube age, whatever you do, it will be pulled up
again at some later stage in your life.
∙ When you are young, you make mistakes and do
some stupid stuff. I have been hearing a lot about
young people who post their stuff on Facebook and
suddenly they go apply for a job and somebody is
going to search… and so that is some practical
political advise…”
-- Barack Obama (President of the United States of
America)
Be careful; about what you post on facebook:
Be Careful About Posting in Facebook - YouTube.avi
∙ Depression
∙ Low self-esteem
∙ Health problems
∙ Poor grades
∙ Suicidal thoughts
∙ Trust and relationship issues
∙ Anger issues
We see 3 responses from this:
∙ Bully (Philistines, Goliath)
∙ Bullied (Israelites, David)
∙ By-standers
3 types of by-standers:
∙ The fearful and indifferent (neutral)
∙ The fearful and despondent (negative) – Eliab v28
∙ The fearful and pro-active encourager (positive) –
Saul v27(b)
∙ We all have a responsibility to the bully and the bullied
∙ By-standers – stand up for people : By-standing or
standing by
Phoebe Prince, 15 :Phoebe Prince, 15 May
Have Committed Suicide Because of
Cyber Bullying - YouTube.avi
Today Show:
Today Show - Teen Bullies Apologize In
Phoebe Prince Case - YouTube.avi
31What, then, shall (Your Name) say in response to this? If
God is for (Your Name), who can be against (Your Name)?
32He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for
(Your Name) —how will he not also, along with him,
graciously give (Your Name) all things?
33Who will bring any charge against those whom God has
chosen? It is God who justifies.
34Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more
than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of
God and is also interceding for (Your Name).
35Who shall separate (Your Name) from the love of Christ?
Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or
nakedness or danger or sword?
36As it is written: "For (Your Name) ’s sake we face death all
day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through
him who loved (Your Name).
38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels
nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any
powers,
39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation,
will be able to separate (Your Name) from the love of God
that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Learn to Trust God in ALL Circumstances
“There is much knowledge in the world but little wisdom.
Wisdom comes from our centeredness in the finality of the
absoluteness of God’s truth , and the total and complete
surrender to His loving will.”
(Journal: 12 October 2006)
... is measured by our
commitment and surrender
to the
Lordship of Christ.
(Journal: 15 Jan 2008)
“Christian living is about a tension. A tension of daily
dying and surrendering to God’s awesome gentleness and
perfect love. This gives us the strength, hope and joy to
live each day for Him. Though difficult, it promises grace.
Though painful, it promises hope. Though perplexing, it
promises peace. Above all, we are never alone!
…In total surrender comes complete peace”
(Journal: 17 June 2002)
God Loves Each of Us As If There Were
Only One of Us!
- Saint Augustine
School Counsellors:
∙ Ms Chow Oi Har [email protected]
∙ Mr Muhammad Hafiz [email protected]
∙ Mr Charlie Ong [email protected]
Director (Counselling):
∙ Mrs Mervyln Goh [email protected]
Christian Ministry Staff:
∙ Mrs Jaime Hang [email protected]
Death crawl:
-DeathCrawl- from
Facing the Giants YouTube.avi