Transcript Conflict Management And Decision Making

◦ Conflict: a disagreement between people with
opposing view points, ideas, or goals.
◦ Conflicts can be an exchange of words
◦ Group confrontations can be ongoing
◦ Conflicts that involve weapons can be serious
Some conflicts are with
YOURSELF!
1. Resources: something usable, such as goods ,
property, money or time.
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Examples??? Couples who fight over finances, which restaurant,
study or go mall with mom, fighting over the computer…
2. Values: your beliefs and ideas you consider
important
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3.
Examples??? Browns fan, daily PE class, politics,
Emotional Needs: the need to belong and feel
respected and worthwhile
examples??? Left out, dis-respected, put down, feel it’s
unfair didn't make the science Olympiad, sports team etc…
Think of a conflict you’ve had recently
and briefly describe.
 Answer the following questions in
your notes.
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 1.What
was it about?
 2. What caused it? (Resources,
Values, Emotional)
 3. Was it resolved? Explain.
If I learn to manage my
anger then…
Release frustrations of
life.
 Calls Attention to
Problems
 Helps us understand
self and other’s values
 Increases motivation to
take action
 Brings about change
 Healthier relationships
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If I don’t and conflicts
get out of hand then…
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Anger can build and
boil over
Can lead to violence
Irrational thinking
Not pleasant to be
around
Lead to depression
(esp.boys)
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You were just presented with a check for:
$1,000.00
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List all the things you would do with the
money.
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HypocriteOne who subscribes to one set of values, and
does another.
Immaturity- one who has not defined their
values, flighty, drifters, uncertain
Maturity-clear values, life of purpose,
meaning and direction
Calm. It. Down.
Attack the
Problem- not the
person!
Brainstorm
Explain how you
feel; Let each
person tell their
side
Ask Questions; to
learn the other
person’s point of
view
Talk to a trusted
adult
Take a time out
to calm down and think through my anger.
Allow each person to tell his or her side
then paraphrase the other persons position.
Let each person ask questions
in order to view the issue from the others point of
view.
Keep brainstorming solutions
either to find the middle ground or creative
solution
1. Identify the Problem
◦ (Identify, ask yourself questions, what choices do you need to make and
who else if anyone is involved)
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What are the choices
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Gather Information- what’s helpful to know before making a
decision
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Consider outcomes and values
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Make a decision and act.
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Evaluate your decision
◦ (List everything, ask for suggestions and make sure they are safe.)
◦ (honesty, respect and trust) Consequences of each options Healthful
Ethical Legal and Parent approval)
◦ (Ready to take action, choose a course that supports your values, the
impact of all choices on self and others and ask a trusted adult if unsure.)
◦ (Reach expectations, how did it affect others, how you feel about yourself
and what could you do differently)
Communication:
The exchange of thoughts, feelings, beliefs and
wants between two or more people.
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Non Verbal
(without words)
Body Language
Gestures
Facial
expressions
posture
Tone of Voice
How you say
something as
important as
WHAT you say.
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Sometimes verbal and non verbal messages
can send two different messages. For that
reason, be aware of the non verbal messages
you send=
MIXED MESSAGE:
occurs when your words say one thing but your
body language says another.
(i.e. “sorry” while grinning)
 What does that tell the other person? Other examples??????
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You Messages: (blame /aggressive)
“You can’t do anything right!”
I Messages- A statement that presents a
situation from the speaker’s personal
feelings/viewpoint:
“I’m mad because I wanted to work on the project together”
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Effective Verbal Communication:
Speaking Skills
Be clear
Use “I messages”
Stay Calm
Stick to the point
Choose the right time/place
Be aware of tone and B Language
Listening Skills
Active Listening
Pay attention
Use correct BL
THINK first
Ask open Questions
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Round 1
-Draw a picture on the Receivers back (ex. House ,
tree) Something recognizable.
-Phone #
- Pattern on how to get to some place in the
classroom.
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Write down on a piece of paper what you feel
your partner is writing on your back.
Round #2
Sender – Whispers
-drawing
-phone #
-instructions on how to get to a place in the
classroom (ex. Under, over, crawling)
Receiver- follows directions.
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Round #3
Sender – Demonstrates
Receiver- Follows Directions.
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Reverse roles
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Active Listening is hearing, thinking about
and responding to the other person’s
message.
More Listening Tips!
Concentrate on what the other person is saying. Don’t be thinking
about what you are going to say next or interrupt.
Nod your head to show you are listening- give feed back”(then what
happened?”
Let the person finish speaking!
Stay calm- even if you’re hearing something you don’t like
Keep an open mind; Listen even if you disagree accept that others
won’t always think the same way you do.
Pressure
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pushed toward making a certain choice.
A Peer
is someone in your own age group.
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Peer Pressure
someone your own age, is pushing you toward
making a certain choice
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Spoken vs. Unspoken
Spoken:
Something said to you directly
Unspoken:
When you feel you are supposed to do
something
S.T.O.P.
 Say
no in a firm voice
 Tell why not
 Offer other ideas
 Promptly leave
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Aggressive:
Overly forceful, pushy, hostile
Passive
Giving up, giving in, backing down, easy to
persuade.
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Assertive
Confidence and clearly stating your intentions
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Non Verbal
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfDWQG4
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwiNFcgh
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Verbal
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5hMN_X
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