Transcript Lecture 4: Biblical View of Romance & Intimacy

Romance & Intimacy
Lecture 4: Biblical View of Romance & Sex
www.prshockley.org
Biblical View of Romance:
Song of Solomon 7:1-8:4:
The husband is the Initiator & Operator: 7:19a.
The wife is the Responder & Co-Operator:
7:9b-8:4.
Tom Nelson states that in order to be
biblically romantic you need to …
 Be Righteous
 Be Courteous
 Be Vocal
 Be Affectionate
 Be Thoughtful
 Be Appreciative
 Be Honoring
 Be Creative
 Be Spontaneous
 Be Responsive
 Be Together
 Learn your mate
4 Purposes of Sex:
 Procreation (Genesis 1:27-28);
 Pleasure (Song of Solomon 7:9-8:4; 1 Corinthians 7:3-5);
 Intimacy (Genesis 2; Ephesians 5:25-33);
 Portrait: Demonstration of God’s love for His people (John 13:34
cf. Ephesians 5:25).
A. Procreation:
 It is through procreation that God has chosen this particular
method, the union of two people, to spread or extend His
image. Therefore, to “rebel” against this method is to deny
further opportunities for His image to be reflected.
 Image of God (Genesis 1:26-27):




Personality
Stewardship
Community
Representation
Community
Stewardship
Personality
Representation
B. Pleasure: 1 Corinthians 7:3-5
 “If God created sex, and if the Bible tells us that he created it for our
pleasure, then he knows how we can get the maximum benefit of it.
The view of God as a cosmic killjoy is quite wrong, for every ‘No’ there
is a ‘Yes.’! It is quite true that sex outside of marriage is considered
utterly sinful in the Bible. But that is only half the story: within marriage it
is profoundly beautiful and utterly good.” ~ Dr. Dan Wallace.
 We are transformative, continually changing and growing constantly.
 Everything we do is to glorify the Lord- with our utter utmost. The
pleasure is worshipful when done in a way that is God-honoring, not
de-valuing the inherent worth of another.
 Marital sex can be very beautiful. Premarital sex or extramarital affairs
are ungodly and will leave you emotionally sterile; the effects are
dehumanizing for they mar, scar, and sear what is beautiful, leading
you downward into spiritual degeneration.
 Consider J. Budzizewski’s illustration of the duct tape from Ask Me
Anything (1).
C. Intimacy:
 The monogamous commitment, “till death do us part” can
produce the deepest intimacy.
 Sin, on the other hand, produces spiritual and emotional pain,
numbness, and sterility
Intimacy:
Marital intimacy
produces extraordinary
benefits.
Lack of marital intimacy
yields negative, hurtful,
painful,& destructive
consequences.
Agape: Love as
Commitment (Rom. 5:18)
is most broad: John
3:16.
Phileo: Brotherly
Love
Eros:
Physical
Intimacy
Scope of
Intimacy
Agape Gives
Direction
Phileo
Is Cultivated
Eros
Consummates
Agape leads in
a biblical view
of Sex
Unbiblical view
of sex leads to
instability;
Instability
leads to
fragmentation.
D. Portrait: John 13:35-35;
Ephesians 5:25.
 Love for another another is a demonstration of God’s love.
 In what ways did Christ demonstrate His love to the church?
 Consider the characteristics of biblical love: 1 John 3:16-17
 Sacrifice
 Self-Surrender
 Meet Practical Needs
 Ever so Genuine
Where’s your leverage and what is
your security & resource when times
get tough?
Male
Find
Female
Another
Biblical Resource & Security: Abide
in Christ:
God
Husband
Wife
Procreation
Portrait
Pleasure
Intimacy
The greater
the
harmony,
the
healthier
the
relationship.
Bibliography:
 “The Doctrine of Romance: Solomon 7:1-8:4” by
Tom Nelson. DVD Marriage 10, # 1088 1/25/2004
given at Denton Bible Church, Denton, Texas. 1866-DBC TAPES or dbcmedia.org. I whole heartily
recommend viewing this DVD. It is remarkable!
 J. Budziszewski, Ask Me Anything (1) & (2); both
volumes. Extraordinary dialogues.
 “Rushdoony, Neoplatonism, and a Biblical View
of Sex” by Dr. Dan Wallace.