Transcript 8 rules for online writing

Technical & Business Writing
April 30, 2013
….reading online is very different from reading
in print.
 Readers only read 28% of the
words
A web writing study by Jakob Nielsen revealed that…
Nebraska is filled with internationally
recognized attractions that draw
large crowds of people every year,
without fail. In 1996, some of the
most popular places were Fort
Robinson State Park (355,000
visitors), Scotts Bluff National
Monument (132,166), Arbor Lodge
State Historical Park & Museum
(100,000), Carhenge (86,598), Stuhr
Museum of the Prairie Pioneer
(60,002), and Buffalo Bill Ranch State
Historical Park (28,446).
In 1996, six of the best-attended
attractions in Nebraska were Fort
Robinson State Park, Scotts Bluff
National Monument, Arbor Lodge
State Historical Park &
Museum, Carhenge, Stuhr Museum of
the Prairie Pioneer, and Buffalo Bill
Ranch State Historical Park.
Concise text increased
Reader’s understanding by
58%
To avoid her own tardiness for the meeting, she
was transported by taxi.
She took a taxi so she wouldn’t be late.
The upcoming and present hurricane, named
Alexis, is possibly expected to make landfall
Saturday.
Hurricane Alexis may arrive Saturday.
Reduce Prepositions
To, from, with, by, in, on, at, into, of
11 prepositions!
A
Since the time that the
Health Sector Reform Agenda
was espoused up to present,
it has always been advocated
that one of the strategies to
reform the health care system
of the country is to expand
and sustain the membership
base of PhilHealth since the
framers argued that in doing
so would improve the
efficiency with which health
services are financed and
reduce the financial burden of
poor families in getting sick.
B
11 prepositions!
A
Since the time that the Health Sector
Reform Agenda was espoused up to
present, it has always been advocated
that one of the strategies to reform the
health care system of the country is to
expand and sustain the membership
base of PhilHealth since the framers
argued that in doing so would improve
the efficiency with which health
services are financed and reduce the
financial burden of poor families in
getting sick.
Total words: 71
Sentences: 1
Passive voice: 100%
Flesch Reading Ease: 9.2
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 29.8
1 preposition!
B
Since the Health Reform Agenda’s
inception, framers always advocated that
one health care system reform strategy is
to expand and sustain PhilHealth’s
membership base. Doing so would
improve health financing efficiency and
reduce poor families’ financial burden.
Total Words 35
Sentences: 2
Passive voice: 0%
Flesch Reading Ease: 39.2
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 12.1
Nebraska is filled with internationally
recognized attractions that draw
large crowds of people every year,
without fail. In 1996, some of the
most popular places were Fort
Robinson State Park (355,000
visitors), Scotts Bluff National
Monument (132,166), Arbor Lodge
State Historical Park & Museum
(100,000), Carhenge (86,598), Stuhr
Museum of the Prairie Pioneer
(60,002), and Buffalo Bill Ranch State
Historical Park (28,446).
The change on the right
helped reader’s
understanding by 47%
Nebraska is filled with internationally
recognized attractions that draw
large crowds of people every year,
without fail. In 1996, some of the
most popular places were:
• Fort Robinson State Park (355,000
visitors)
• Scotts Bluff National Monument
(132,166)
• Arbor Lodge State Historical Park
& Museum (100,000)
• Carhenge (86,598)
• Stuhr Museum of the Prairie
Pioneer (60,002)
• Buffalo Bill Ranch State Historical
Park (28,446).
With respect to the arrival of Typhoon Quiel…
Due to the fact that Typhoon Quiel…
In such a way that Typhoon Quiel…
There seems to be a strong possibility that
Typhoon Quiel…
Typhoon Quiel’s arrival
Because Typhoon Quiel….
Typhoon Quiel…
Typhoon Quiel may…
The apples were bought by me.
I bought the apples.
The program is overseen by DepEd.
DepEd oversees the program.
He was hired by the principal last year.
The principal hired him last year.
Point: avoid empty verbs:
is, was, were, are, have been, etc.
5. Use root-form verbs
Improvement
Improving
Improve
A
B
“In the same order is also aiming that
the General Objective of the
Universal Health Care approach is for
strengthening the National Health
Insurance Program (NHIP) as the
prime mover in improvement of
financial risk protection, generation
of resources for modernization and
sustainment of health facilities, and
provision of public health services for
achieving the Millenium
Development Goals.”
The same order aims to strengthen
the National Health Insurance
Program (NHIP) in three ways:
protect consumers from financial
risk, modernize health facilities,
and provide better public health
services. This is part of the General
Objective of Universal Health Care
to achieve the Millennium
Development Goals (MGDs).
DepEd has begun to implement the UbD
curriculum. It will be not be fully implemented
this year. It will be implemented in a series of
stages. The first stage will occur at the first-year
high school level. Subsequent years will see
implementation at other grade levels. This is to
assure a smooth transition to the new system.
DepEd has begun to implement the UbD
curriculum. It will be not be fully implemented
this year. It will be implemented in a series of
stages. The first stage will occur at the first-year
high school level. Subsequent years will see
implementation at other grade levels. This is to
assure a smooth transition to the new system.
DepEd has begun to implement the UbD
curriculum. It will not be fully implemented this
year, but rather in series of stages: first, at the
first-year high school level, with subsequent
years implementing other grade levels. This will
assure a smooth transition.
Bad: Nielsen speculates decreased user
concentration is correlated with internet
interactivity.
Better: Nielsen thinks our short attention span
online is related to web clickability.
Good: Nielsen thinks clickable links decrease
our attention span online.
There are three major controversial provisions
of the RH Bill.
There are 3 major controversial provisions of
the RH Bill.
A total of fifty-seven people were killed by
Typhoon Pedring
A total of 57 people were killed by Typhoon
Pedring.
Ya gets?
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
Reduce words by 50%
Make text “scannable” (bullet points)
Avoid empty sentence starts (…”with respect to”)
Avoid passive voice (the project was started)
Use root-form verbs (implementation implement)
Use S, M, and L sentences
Use familiar web vocabulary
Write in numerals (“7” not “seven”)