Transcript Mark West Neighborhood Church A Vision for Men’s Ministry • Building the Believer • Equipping the Worker • Reaching the World for Christ “Calling Men into Vital Relationships”

Mark West
Neighborhood Church
A Vision for
Men’s Ministry
• Building the Believer
• Equipping the Worker
• Reaching the World for Christ
“Calling Men into
Vital Relationships”
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What is the Purpose of a
Vital Relationship?
THE PURPOSE OF A VITAL MENTORING
RELATIONSHIP IS FOR MEN TO HELP
EACH OTHER BECOME CHRISTLIKE IN
EVERY RELATIONSHIP IN A MAN’S LIFE.
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Why Relationship???!!
“A new command I give you: Love
one another. As I have loved you, so
you must love one another. By this all
men will know that you are my
disciples, if you love one another.”
John 13:34-35 (NIV)
It’s pretty hard, if not impossible,
to love someone unless you
know them…
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What about Relationships?
• In spite of the clear biblical mandate to “love one
another” (John 13:34-35), most Christian men have
very few close friends. Yet many of these men wish
they had a brother in Christ whom they could really
count on.
• We are called to committed love relationships
with each other (there are more than 50 “one
another” scripture references).
• To build a mentoring relationship requires us to
be intentional. It is not easy to do, but it is
scriptural and worth the rewards.
• As men grow relationally and spiritually, they
deepen their commitment to Jesus Christ, their
family, friends, church and community.
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What is the Situation?
The situation or problem is, even with
enormous pressures coming from family,
career, health or finances, on a typical
weekend, only 1 out of 3 men attend church.
During the week, roughly 27 million men read
the Bible (other than at church), yet 67 million
men do not open God’s Word during the week.
George Barna
President
Barna Research Group, Ltd.
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The Situation (continued)
Why have so many men made a conscious decision to
ignore Christ or His church at the same time they are
seeking for meaning, purpose, significance, influence
and joy? Our study among the unchurched (those who
have not attended a Christian church service during
the past six months) sheds light on this question.
Most unchurched men believe that involvement with
a church does not offer any value to their life.
-George Barna
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The Situation (continued)
As decision-makers in their sphere of influence, most
men instinctively conduct a cost-benefit analysis of
every opportunity they face. Their objective is to
maximize benefits while minimizing costs. Our
research shows that a majority of churched men arrive
at this same conclusion:
Participation in church life cannot be justified
because they perceive that the return on their
investment of time, attention and energy is too slim.
-George Barna
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Men’s Ministry - Definition
Effective Men’s Ministry is a lifechanging process that produces
teams of men intentionally climbing
toward spiritual maturity and
bringing others with them.
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Why a Men’s Ministry?
“For the equipping of the saints for the work
of service, to the building up of the body of
Christ; until we all attain to the unity of the
faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of
God, to a mature man to the measure of the
stature which belongs to the fullness of
Christ.”
Ephesians 4:12-13 (NASB)
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Ten More Reasons
for Men’s Ministry
1. Men are hungry for God.
2. Men need authentic brotherhood in Christ.
3. Men have valuable spiritual gifts to offer
their local church.
4. Men are searching for significance
5. Men need to take personal responsibility
and deal with personal issues.
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6. Men need a spiritual mentor to provide a positive
role model (the mentor’s age does not matter!).
7. Men need to be accountable to one another.
8. Men need a safe environment to avail
male relationships.
9. Men need to learn how to serve and how
to actually become foot washers.
10. Men need something worthwhile to do
and something meaningful to look forward
to.
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Principles of Men’s Ministry
Principle #1:
A Ministry focused on relationships, not programs
Principle #2:
A Ministry with clear goals
Principle #3:
A Ministry for men only
Principle #4:
A Pastor-Supported Ministry
Principle #5:
A Ministry led by a core group of men
Principle #6:
A Ministry with flexibility and variety
Principle #7:
Avoid implementing too much too soon.
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The Purpose of our Father’s Call
“… to be conformed to
the likeness of His Son…
the firstborn among
many brothers.”
Christlike
Hope –––––––––– Laborers
Romans 8:28-29
Love –––––––––– Brothers
Faith –––––––––– Disciples
“…we all… are
being transformed
into His likeness…
2 Corinthians 3:18
The Cross
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The Purpose of our Father’s Call (a closer look)
(Our nourishing Word)
Christlike
“We continually remember
before our God and Father
your work produced by faith,
your labor prompted by love,
and your endurance inspired
by hope in our Lord Jesus
Christ.”
Hope
(Building the Body)
Love
1 Thessalonians 1:3 (NIV)
Faith
Laborers for Christ
Brothers in Christ
(Serving the Body)
Disciples of Christ
(Being equipped by the Body)
The Cross
(Accept Jesus Christ)
“The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few.”
Matthew 9:37
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“Let’s Play Ball!”
The Relational Baseball Diamond
•
•
•
•
First Base
Second Base
Third Base
Home Plate
Becoming Acquaintances
Building Friendships
Bonding as Brothers
Being Christlike
(Of course to play, you first
have to step up to the plate…)
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“THE RELATIONAL DIAMOND”
The process of building
vital relationships among
men can be likened to a
baseball diamond in that
there are four phases of
development.
The process starts as we
“step up to the plate”
with the desire and
determination to become
more like Christ.
Most of us won’t hit a
“home run” in our efforts
to form relationships,
most men are lucky just
to get to first base!
There are some guys in
the dugout, but there is a
whole stadium just
watching, let alone the
rest of the world.
Heading for First
Becoming “Acquaintances”
Focus on: • Listening to each other (implies we are
spending time talking to each other)
• Accepting each other
• Building trust in the context of shared
experiences and activities = IMPORTANT!
• Identifying and exploring group ideas and
establishing the purpose for meeting together
• Confidentiality
“Accept one another, then, just as
Christ accepted you…”
Romans 15:7
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Sliding into Second
Building “Friendships”
Sliding implies friction and getting soiled
Focus on:
• Discussing ideas & sharing opinions on
men’s subjects (deeper level of communication)
• Adjusting to unmet expectations in an
honest and respectful way
• Conflict resolution skills
• Gaining confidence in one another
“Encourage one another and build each
other up…”
1 Thessalonians 5:11
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Rounding Third Base
Bonding as “Brothers in Christ”
Focus on:
• Team building
• Worship together
• The struggle for moral excellence together
• Covenants and accountability
in small groups
“…teach and admonish one another…” Colossians 3:16
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”
Proverbs 27:17
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Running for Home
Being “Christlike”
Focus on:
• Teamwork
• Our “unique contribution”
• Using our spiritual gifts in the body
• Influencing our world
“…serve one another in love.”
Galatians 5:13
“By your unity the world
will know that God sent me”
John 17:23-24
(Ephesians 4:3)
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How do we
Multiply our Effectiveness
for Christ?
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Remember our:
Men’s Ministry Definition
Effective Men’s Ministry is a lifechanging process that produces
teams of men intentionally climbing
toward spiritual maturity and
bringing others with them.
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Multiplying our Effectiveness
“Stepping Up to the Plate”
When: • We begin to face the challenges of life as a “team”
• Mutual “accountability” becomes foundational in our lives
• We “help” our church
• We “reach out” to our peers and the community
Then: • We can multiply our effectiveness and encourage
other men to “Step up to the plate,”
run the bases, and head for Home.
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The Challenge
We cannot grow by ourselves!
We must have the humility and/or courage to get involved
with our brothers and stay involved. As our commitment to
serve Jesus Christ and the body of believers solidifies,
the Holy Spirit will gradually reveal to us what our “unique
contribution” is to be which will be affirmed by other
brothers. Then, in our own way (but not in our own
strength and understanding*), we can participate in what
God is doing in the world today as part of a committed
team of men.
* Trust in the Lord with all of your heart,
And do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge (know) Him,
And He will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6
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It’s true We have our Father in heaven!
Also it’s true
that…
Every man needs
a brother!
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Why brothers?
One of the keys to a man’s growth in Christ is to find
men of like heart and become brothers, moving
together toward the goal of Christlikeness.
Christ died so I might live, I must die so Christ can
live in me. *
In this age of individualism, men are beginning to
realize the importance and need of having brothers
who will support, encourage, and hold one another
accountable to a Christian model of manhood.
•“I have been crucified with Christ and I no
longer live, but Christ lives in me.”
Galatians 2:20a
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What does it mean to be
a brother in Christ?
It’s more than just joining a club or attending
some meeting. To be a true brother requires a
degree of RELATIONAL INTIMACY (into-me-see)
that doesn’t come naturally to most men.
The most important thing in any relationship is
“communication” which requires time together,
which requires commitment to a priority.
We can grow deeper in our relationships as we
learn to:
• accept one another as ACQUAINTANCES
• encourage one another as FRIENDS
• and exhort one another as BROTHERS

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How do we face the Challenge
of not doing it alone?
The Bible teaches that there are RESOURCES
available to help us face the challenge!
God has given us: • His Spirit
• His Word
• and one another so we won’t have
to do the job alone.
“And the things which you have heard from me in
the presence of many witnesses, these entrust to
faithful men, who will be able to teach others also.”
2 Timothy 2:2 (NASB)
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The Vision…
It is important to pursue vital relationships with
other brothers which requires commitment and
communication. As an example, the Promise
Keepers Ministry recognizes the importance of this
in their second promise.
In our Men’s Ministry we want to recognize our
God-given personalities & our spiritual gifts and:
• Get together because of Christ
• Grow together in Christ
• Go forth to serve Christ
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How does a man
get involved?
Through Entry Points!
It’s important for a Men’s Ministry
to focus on “Entry Points.” These
are places a man can choose to
go for entering into relationships
with other guys.
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“PK Funnels Model for Entry Points”
Men’s Conferences
Men’s Congregational
Gatherings
Men’s Small Groups
•Men dying to self
and allowing Jesus
Christ to live in them
as they relate to:
•
Family
•
Friends
•
Church
• Community/World
“The 5000”
John 6:1-14
“The 500”
1 Cor 15:4-6
“The 120”
“The 72”
“The 12”
Acts 1:13-15
Luke 10:1-24
Luke 6:12-16
More Relational Commitment 
Men’s Equipping
Seminars
More Biblical Information Given 
Men’s Special Events
Small Groups
The Bottom of the Funnel
“The work is too heavy for you;
you cannot handle it alone.”
Exodus 18:18b (NIV)
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Why are “Small Groups” (3-12 men)
so important for vital relationships?
1. To foster “spiritual growth” (Acts 2:42)
2. To foster “relational growth” (Hebrews 10:24-25)
3. To provide “emotional support” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
4. To “stimulate service” (1 Peter 4:10)
5. To relationally “incorporate newcomers”
6. To “develop leadership”
7. To provide “clear vision” for a Christian man
(Mark 12:30-31 and Matthew 28:19-20)
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Seven benefits men will receive by
meeting in “Small Groups”
1. It provides opportunity to learn with other men
how to live the Christian life.
2. It is a safe place where men learn to express
love to others.
3. It is a place where men get to know each other
in an atmosphere of love and acceptance.
4. It is a place where men find strength to face
trials, changes, and personal decisions.
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Seven benefits men will receive by
meeting in “Small Groups” (continued)
5. It is a place where men are free to be spiritual.
6. It is a place where men can worship and pray
together.
7. It is a place where men can discover their
spiritual gifts in order to serve others.
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Some notable quotes…
“Aim at nothing, and you’ll hit it every time.”
- Howard Hendricks
Professor, Dallas Theological Seminary
“Our men are theologically pure but relationally
bankrupt.”
- Lee Stallings
Executive Pastor, Campus Baptist Church - Fresno, CA
“The atmosphere you create is more important than the
content you cover.”
- Howard Hendricks
Professor, Dallas Theological Seminary
“It hasn’t been easy. The first few years are tough. Men
don’t see the value of men’s ministry at first. Their
schedules are already full.”
- Ross Robinson
Minister of Education, First Baptist Church - Paducah, KY
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Where do WE GO from here?
“Forgetting what lies behind and
reaching forward to what lies ahead,
I press on toward the goal for the
prize of the upward call of God in
Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 3:13b-14 (NASB)
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WE need to remember the… “the Lighthouse”
PRINCIPLES OF MEN’S MINISTRY
Principle #1:
A Ministry focused on relationships, not programs
Principle #2:
A Ministry with clear goals
Principle #3:
A Ministry for men only
Principle #4:
A Pastor-Supported Ministry
Principle #5:
A Ministry led by a core group of men
Principle #6:
A Ministry with flexibility and variety
Principle #7:
Avoid implementing too much too soon.
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“Unless the Lord builds the house,
its builders labor in vain.
Unless the Lord watches over the city,
the watchmen stand guard in vain.”
Psalm 127:1
How do we begin?
LET’S GO and have us
“step up to the plate” and:
1.
2.
“ We cannot expect an overnight
Men’s Ministry anymore than we
can expect to hit a Home Run, it
may take years.”
3.
4.
5.
Pray
Develop a core leadership
“small group”
Take a profile of “the men”
Develop a purpose/mission
statement
Remember Principle #7:
“Avoid implementing too
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much too soon.”
Mark West
Neighborhood Church
A Vision for
Men’s Ministry
• Building the Believer
• Equipping the Worker
• Reaching the World for Christ
The End
Bert Hartmann
(707) 542-1000
October 12, 2001
“Calling Men into
Vital Relationships”
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Some Men’s Ministry Ideas…
SMALL GROUP DISCUSSION BOOKS
Daily Disciplines for the Christian Man
by Dr. Bob Beltz
The Man in the Mirror
by Patrick Morley
Spirit-Controlled Temperament
by Tim LaHaye
ACTIVITIES
Men’s Breakfasts w/ Videos
Evening Men’s Bible Study
Special Outings
Special “Innings” at the Church
Attend Men’s Retreat
PK Conference
GROUP TEACHING
• Five Levels of Communication
• Temperament (Personality) Types
• Servant Leadership
• Prayer
• New Covenant
• Spiritual Gifts
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And know and remember…
The Lord uses an
individual man to
make a difference!
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