Conversations

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Transcript Conversations

Interpersonal
1
Conversations
A locally managed
sequential interchange
of thoughts and
feelings between two
or more people.
Interactive and
extemporaneous.
Microsoft Photo
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Conversations (cont’d)
Locally managed: only those involved in
the conversation determine the topic.
 Sequentially organized: have openings,
middles, and closes.
 Interactive: Involve at least two people.
 Largely extemporaneous: Participants have
not prepared or memorized what they will
be saying.
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Let’s Have
A
Party!
Casual
Social
Conversations
 Spontaneous
interactions
between people,
with no planned
agenda
Pragmatic
ProblemConsideration
Conversations
 Conversational
episodes in which
at least one
participant has a
communication
goal
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Pragmatic Problem-Consideration
Conversations
1. Greeting and small talk
2. Topic introduction and
statement of need for
discussion
3. Information exchange
and processing
4. Summarizing decisions
and clarifying next steps
Skipping
a stage
may
provide
less
satisfaction
5. Formal closing
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Characteristics of Conversations
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Formality – degree to which the conversation must
follow rules, procedures or rituals.
Turn-Taking – alternating between speaker & listener.
a.
b.
c.
d.
Speaker can decide who’s next
Nonverbally signaling our desire to go next
We can self-select to go next by talking next
We can interrupt
Topic Change – method by which people introduce
new topics
Talk Time – fair sharing of speaking time
Scriptedness – common conversations that happen so
often they are routine, as if to follow a script (conarration).
Conversational Audience – who’s conversing &
eavesdropping.
Rules
A prescription that indicates what
behaviors are required, preferred, or
prohibited in certain contexts
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Conversational Ballgames
by: Nancy Masterson Sakamoto
Read “Diverse Voices”
Pages 165-6
Cultural Connotations
Individual
Low uncertainty
Avoidance (Tolerant)
Low-context
Masculine
(rigid sex defined)
Low powerdistance (downplay social
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distances)
United States
Cultural Variations
United States
Low Context Cultures
 Participatory – everyone
joins in
 Include categorical words
such as certainly,
absolutely



Relevant comments that
are directly to the point
Speaking one’s mind
Silence is seldom good
Japan
High Context Cultures
 Ritualized, formal &
stuctured
 Include qualifiers such as
maybe, perhaps
Indirect, ambiguous and less
relevant comments
 Creating harmony
 Silence indicates
truthfulness, embarrassment,
disagreement

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Examples of Communication
Rules
If your mouth is full of food, then you
must not talk.
 If someone is talking, then you must not
interrupt.
 If you can’t say something nice, then you
don’t say anything at all.
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More
Communication Rules
If you are spoken to, you must reply.
 If more than 2 people are conversing, then
each should have equal time.
 If your conversational partner is
significantly older than you, then you
should refrain from using profanities &
obscenities.
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Even More
Communication Rules
If you are going to say something that you don’t
want overheard, then drop the volume of your
voice.
 If you are being spoken to, you should direct
your gaze to the speaker.
 Or, from a different cultural perspective, if you
are being spoken to, you should look at the floor.
 And, if another does not hear a question you
asked, then you must repeat it.
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Discuss what communication rules
you think are important.
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Cooperative Principle
Conversations will be satisfying
when the contributions made by
conversationalists are in line with
the purpose of the conversation.
We don’t like people who go off
subject. . .
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Conversation Maxims
Quality
Quantity
Relevancy
Truthful
information
Not too much
or too little
Related to
the topic
Manner
Morality
Politeness
Specific,
Meet
organized, and moral/ethical
understandable
guidelines
Be
courteous
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The Effective Conversationalist
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
Presents quality information.
Provides free information to enable
others to talk.
Ask questions that are likely to motivate
responses.
Credits sources.
Practices turn-taking.
Maintains conversational coherence.
Practices politeness.
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Positive Facework
 Messages
affirming a person or person’s
actions in the face of a difficult situation.
 Used
to protect another’s need to save
face, ie. need to be respected, liked, or
valued.
Positive Facework
To perform:
1. Convey positive feelings about what the
other has said or done in the situation.
2. Express admiration for other’s efforts
3. Acknowledge how difficult situation is
4. Express belief other’s efforts will endure
or succeed.
Negative Facework
 Using
verbally indirect methods when
offering information, opinions or advice.
 Used
to protect another’s negative face
needs, ie. need for independence,
autonomy and authority.
Negative Facework
To perform:
1. Ask permission before making suggestions
2. Verbally defer to opinions/preferences of the
other person
3. Use tentative language to hedge & qualify your
position
4. Offer suggestions indirectly by telling stories or
describing hypothetical options.
Politeness
Politeness -- relating to others in ways that
meet their need to be appreciated.
 Positive face needs– desire to be appreciated
and approved, liked and honored.
 Negative face needs – desire to be free from
imposition or intrusion.
 Face-threatening acts (FTAs) – behavior that
fails to meet positive or negative face needs
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Engage in Ethical Dialogue
Be:
Authenticity - direct, honest,
straightforward information and feelings
 Empathy – understanding another’s point
of view (without giving up yours)
 Confirmation – affirming others as unique
individuals (does not imply approving of
their behaviors)
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Engage in Ethical Dialogue
(continued)
Be:
Present – taking time, avoiding distraction,
being responsive, risking attachment
 Equality – treating conversational partners
on the same level regardless of status
differences
 Supportive climate – encourage
participation by praising efforts
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Activity Work Groups
Marisa, Danielle, Samantha, & Chris
 Niki, Karina, Eric, Charity, & Erika
 Briana, Cassidy, Josh Caryn & Kami
 Jen, Michelyn, Elena, & Nate
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If there are absences, smaller groups will be redistributed by instructor.
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Effective Communicator’s
“Bag of Tricks”
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
Is equipped with information
on a wide range to topics.
Is willing to offer “extra”
information when questions
are asked
Asks questions.
Balances speaking and
listening.
Uses conversational directors
like “Don’t you agree?” or
“What do you think?” which
draw the other person into
the conversation.
6.
7.
8.
9.
Keeps interruptions at a
minimum.
Makes sure that comments
relate to previous comments
by others.
Is polite.
Is ethical, authentic,
empathetic, supportive,
conforming, an active listener,
and treats others as equals.
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