Transcript SELF-DISCLOSURE

Friendships & Dating Relationships
 This lesson will introduce the concept of self-
disclosure within a relationship. You will learn about
four areas of awareness and how they affect the quality
of the bond that develops between people.
 You will learn how four areas of self-disclosure
affect relationships
 You will evaluate your own comfort levels for self-
disclosure
 You will identify components of communication
within the four areas
 Trust is the basis of self-disclosure
 Individuals must be willing and able to self-disclose
at the same level in order for the relationship to
progress forward
 Feeling comfortable with ones self is an important
aspect of sharing with others
 People self-disclose more easily in an emotionally
safe environment
 Genuine self-disclosure takes practice
 Write your name.
 Write down 3 things about yourself that no one else in
the room is likely to know about you.
 The cards will be read aloud to the group.
 Favorite movie, childhood experience, family structure,
etc.
 HAND IN YOUR CARD TO THE TEACHER
 I’ll read the cards individually to the class.
 You need to try and identify the person in the room
who wrote the card.
 If you guess correctly, you get their card in order to
keep score
Share a sheet of paper with someone who has their birthday
in the same month of yours and tear it in ½.
Write your answers to these questions.
 How easy was it for you to think of things to share with the
group? Why do you feel this way?
 How comfortable are you with letting others know things
about you that they didn’t know before?
 Are you equally interested in getting to know more about
someone else? Why might how you feel help or hinder the
growth in a relationship?
 You will be learning about the Johari Window.
 You’ll be introduced to the four areas of self-disclosure
that affect closeness in a relationship.
 Developing an emotional bond with another person
requires trust that develops over time.
 Trust between friends and dating partners is the base
of self-disclosure…allowing others to see more of our
inner person
 There are risks to self-disclosure:
One or both people don’t like what’s revealed and
lose interest
2) One or both people might discover that they don’t
want to disclose at the same level (not mutual)
3) One person feels vulnerable when the other doesn’t
disclose as much information
1)
 Building a relationship with another person requires
both individuals to self-disclose.
 This can be difficult initially because there is always a
threat that the other person may not like what is
revealed and then reject us.
 For every person there is a PERSONAL side and a
PRIVATE side. Being willing to show others who you
really are takes courage and practice.
 The Johari Window is sometimes used to illustrate
how individuals interact with one another.
Pane 1: OPEN
• Area of information that is known
to others and known to myself.
This is general information that is
accessible to everyone.
• This information is comfortable to
talk about and opens the door for a
relationship to begin.
• Name, age, school, family, etc.
Pane 3: HIDDEN
Pane 2: BLIND
Pane 4: MYSTERY
Pane 1: OPEN
Pane 3: HIDDEN
Pane 2: BLIND
• Area where others see things but
the individual is less aware of
them
• Things people are blind to may
include: habits, personality
characteristics, motivation
Pane 4: MYSTERY
Pane 1: OPEN
Pane 3: HIDDEN
• Things that are known by the
individual but are intentionally
kept away from others.
• Including: past experiences,
deeper feelings, future goals, etc
• People are often less willing to
discuss early in a relationship
because it’s risky.
Pane 2: BLIND
Pane 4: MYSTERY
Pane 1: OPEN
Pane 3: HIDDEN
Pane 2: BLIND
Pane 4: MYSTERY
• Areas of self that nobody is
aware of.
• May include: early childhood
experiences, or behaviors such as
WHY people behave in certain
ways: culture, family beliefs, etc.
 The size of each pane is different for different people.
 For most people, the HIDDEN PANE is the biggest
early in a relationship.
 We feel the need to protect our secrets, our feelings
and emotions.
 As Pane 1: OPEN gets larger, Pane 3: HIDDEN gets
smaller information gets easier to share.
 In a relationship, what do you think could happen if
they don’t add more information into the OPEN PANE?
OPEN
OPEN
OPEN
OPEN
OPEN
HIDDEN
HIDDEN
HIDDEN
HIDDEN
HIDDEN
BLIND
MYSTERY
 The BLIND PANE & MYSTERY PANE take a lot more
intimacy and maturity to make grow.
 Until someone feels emotionally
safe, they will not
try to look at those
panes.
BLIND
OPEN
 What makes
these panes so
uncomfortable
to discuss?
HIDDEN
MYSTERY
 With your “desk partner”, discuss the following and start
making notes for your JOHARI WINDOW that you’ll create
today.
1.
In the window, list categories of information that
might be found in each of the panes.
2.
Using the single box, decide how you would divide
the four panes to best describe your own ability to
self-disclose with others you would consider to be
casual friends (refer to notes from yesterday)