Transcript How to Resolve Conflict (Made Easy)

How to Resolve Conflict
with S.U.C.C.E.S.S
Presented by:
Craig Valine, CAJC Vice President, Training
What Comes to Mind When I say
“Conflict?”
• Conflict:
–
–
–
–
–
• The Constructive View
________________
________________
________________
________________
________________
August 21, 2004
–
–
–
–
–
________________
________________
________________
________________
________________
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
2
5 Myths That Inhibit Positive
Conflict Resolution
• Myth #1: Presence of conflict is a sign of a
•
•
•
•
poor leader
Myth #2: Conflict is a sign of low concern for
the organization
Myth #3: Anger is negative and destructive
Myth #4: Conflict, if left alone, will take care
of itself
Myth #5: Conflict must be resolved.
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
3
Resolve Conflict With SUCCESS
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Size Up the Situation
Use the Environment
Compose Your Message
Confirm Understanding and Reciprocate
Engage in Negotiation
Show Commitment
Stabilize and Prevent Through Follow-up
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
4
Step 1: Size of the Situation
• Act only if…
–
–
–
–
You are affected
The issue is significant
There is an objective solution
You are willing to initiate the process
• Determine the specific issue. If you can’t verbalize
it, then you aren’t ready to deal with it
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
5
Step 2: Use the Environment
•
•
•
•
•
Discuss the issue at an appropriate time
Admit when you are wrong
Approach your CRP privately
Monitor your non-verbal communication
Use space & territory to crate a neutral
environment
• Recognize the impact of interpersonal history
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
6
Check Your Non-Verbal
Communication
Be aware of
• The way you look at your CRP…
• Your facial gestures…
• The words you say…
• The tone in which you say it…
• The way you stand…
• Your hand gestures…
• Etc.
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
7
Step 3: Compose Your Message
• Follow the 5-step format
–
–
–
–
–
When you…
I think…
I feel…
And I…
And I would like…
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
8
Step 4: Confirm Understanding
and Reciprocate
• Use “URU” after delivering your initial
formatted message
• Remember to assist your CRP through the URU.
Use probing questions.
• Active listening is essential! – Paraphrase, ask for
clarification
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
9
Step 5: Engage in Negotiation
• Remember the 8 Steps:
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
Define the problem
Define points of agreement
Define points of disagreement
Define desired results
Define standards for acceptance
Develop options
Determine acceptability of options
Determine best option
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
10
Step 6: Show Commitment
• Be certain to Implement, Monitor and Modify
• Don’t forget this step – It’s imperative to the
resolution of the issue and the maintenance of
the relationship
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
11
Step 7: Stabilize and Prevent
Through Follow-up
• To solidify your relationship and ensure ongoing
productivity “touch bases” with your CRP after
the conflict has been resolved
• Remember:
“In Conflict, There is Opportunity.”
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
12
About Your Trainer
Craig Valine is PRIME graduate and Certified Seminar Leader
through the American Seminar Leaders Association. He is a
Certified Master Practitioner in Neuro-Linguistic Programming
(NLP) and is a trained mediator.
Craig served as President of the Pasadena Jaycees in 1999 and has
also served as US Jaycees Western Region Metro Representative,
Individual Development Vice President for the California
Jaycees, and Secretary (a.k.a. “Tiger Paw”) for the California
Jaycees Order of the Tigers. He currently serves as Training Vice
President for the California Jaycees. To contact Craig, call him at
(626) 405-9818 or email him at [email protected]
August 21, 2004
How to Resolve Conflict with S.U.C.C.E.S.S.
13