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Domestic Violence Training for
Managers/Directors
This course is designed for PMC’s
Management Team. It is intended to
assist managers in recognizing signs
and symptoms of abuse that may be
evident in care partners. It will also
provide assistance in knowing where
to go for help.
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What is Domestic Violence?
Types of Domestic Abuse
Warning Signs of Violence and Abuse
Finding Help at PMC
How Can I Help?
Help and Resources
Summary
References
What is Domestic Violence?
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Florida law (FL statute 741.28) defines domestic violence as:
– Any violence committed by any family member against another
family member living in the same home. Stalking is also considered
domestic violence.
– A family member means husband or wife, ex-husband or ex-wife, a
relative or anyone living together as a family. It also means people
who have a child together, whether or not they have ever lived
together.
Myths of Domestic Violence
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Domestic violence only happens in poor families or minorities.
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Domestic violence is caused by alcohol or drug abuse.
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Domestic violence batterers are mentally ill.
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Domestic violence only happens to women.
These are all untrue!!
Domestic Violence Facts
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1 in 4 women will experience
domestic violence in their lifetime.
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85% of all victims are women, but
men and children can also be victims
of domestic violence.
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25% of married women experience
domestic violence on a regular basis.
Domestic Violence Facts
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Domestic violence occurs in families
from all ethnic groups.
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It occurs in religious and nonreligious families.
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Families from all income levels
experience domestic violence.
Domestic Violence Affects the Whole Family
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In 60% of violent homes,
children are also beaten.
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Children who grow up in violent
homes are more likely to be
abusive partners as adults.
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More children are served in
battered women’s shelters than
women.
Types of Domestic Abuse
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Physical abuse
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Emotional and psychological abuse—verbal abuse (yelling, namecalling, blaming, shaming), isolation, intimidation, and controlling
behaviors
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Sexual abuse—forced sex, even by a spouse or intimate partner with
whom you also have consensual sex, is an act of aggression and
violence
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Economic or financial abuse—controlling finances, withholding money,
making you account for every penny you spend
Cycle of Violence
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Abuse—aggressive, belittling, or
violent behavior
Guilt—abusive partner feels guilt,
worried they may be caught for what
they’ve done
Excuses—abuser does everything
they can to regain control and keep
the relationship
Fantasy—abuser begins to fantasize
about hurting again
Set-up—abuser sets up a situation
where they can justify abusing again
Belmonte, Joelle. Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive
Relationships. Help Guide.org (www.helpguide.org). 2001-2008. Web. 25 September 2009.
Warning Signs of Violence and Abuse
People who are being abused may:
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Seem afraid or anxious to please their partner
Check in often with their partner to report where they are and what they’re doing
Receive frequent, harassing phone calls from their partner
Talk about their partner’s temper, jealousy, or possessiveness
Have frequent injuries, with the excuse of “accidents”
Frequently miss work, school, or social occasions, without explanation
Dress in clothing designed to hide bruises or scars (e.g. wearing long sleeves in the
summer or sunglasses indoors)
Have very low self-esteem, even if they used to be confident
Show major personality changes (e.g. an outgoing woman becomes withdrawn)
Be depressed, anxious, or suicidal
Belmonte, Joelle. Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive
Relationships. Help Guide.org (www.helpguide.org). 2001-2008. Web. 25 September 2009.
Is one of your care partners in an Abusive
Relationship?
Does this care partner:
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appear afraid of his/her partner much of the time?
avoid certain topics out of fear of angering his/her partner?
feel that he/she can’t do anything right for his/her partner?
believe that he/she deserves to be hurt or mistreated?
wonder if he/she is the one who is crazy?
appear emotionally numb or helpless?
Belmonte, Joelle. Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive
Relationships. Help Guide.org (www.helpguide.org). 2001-2008. Web. 25 September 2009.
Is one of your care partners in an Abusive
Relationship?
Does your care partner complain that his/her partner behaves in the
following ways:
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humiliates him/her, yells at him/her, criticizes him/her or puts him/her
down?
treats him/her so badly that he/she is embarrassed for his/her friends or
family to see?
ignores or puts down his/her opinions or accomplishments?
blames him/her for their abusive behavior?
has a bad and unpredictable temper?
hurts or threatens to hurt or kill him/her?
Belmonte, Joelle. Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive
Relationships. Help Guide.org (www.helpguide.org). 2001-2008. Web. 25 September 2009.
Is one of your care partners in an Abusive
Relationship?
Does your care partner complain that his/her partner behaves in the
following ways:
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threatens to take his/her children away or harm them?
threatens to commit suicide if he/she leaves?
destroys his/her belongings?
acts excessively jealous and possessive? constantly checks up on
him/her?
controls where he/she goes or what he/she does?
keeps him/her from seeing his/her friends or family?
limits access to money, the phone, or the car?
Finding Help at PMC
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PMC has a Domestic Violence Response Team who is willing to assist
care partners, yourself or a community member in accessing available
resources. The team will meet confidentially with care partners.
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Accessing assistance is as easy as placing one phone call.
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To talk to a member of PMC’s Domestic Violence Response Team, call:
– Jerald Smith, Director of Pastoral Care, ext. 3526
– Melanie Reynolds, Manager of People Development, ext. 2296
– Roberta Chaildin, Manager of Human Resources, ext. 7742
Your Assistance is Needed
• Ensuring the safety of PMC’s care partner, his/her family and our
PMC family is of greatest concern.
• Domestic violence (DV) resource materials are available in People
Development and Communications and Service Excellence.
• Managers are requested to pick up DV brochures and place them in
lounges and break rooms. Also pick up “Help for Victims of
Domestic Violence” pocket cards to be placed in all bathrooms (staff
and community).
Your Assistance is Needed
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Managers may be asked to remove the care partner from the work
schedule for a short period of time to provide time for the care partner
to find safety for themselves and their family.
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Managers may be asked to adjust a care partner’s normal work hours
and schedule him/her at a time when his/her safety is more easily
observed.
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Care partners will be asked to maintain frequent contact with his/her
immediate supervisor, if time off is granted for this situation.
How Can I Help?
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Don't be afraid to let them know that you are concerned for their
safety. Help them recognize the abuse. Tell them you see what is
going on and that you want to help. Help them recognize that what is
happening is not "normal" and that they deserve a healthy, non-violent
relationship.
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Acknowledge that they are in a very difficult and scary situation.
Let them know that the abuse is not their fault. Reassure them that they
are not alone and that there is help and support out there.
How Can I Help?
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Be supportive. Listen. Remember that it may be difficult for them to
talk about the abuse. Let them know that you are available to help
whenever they may need it. What they need most is someone who will
believe and listen to them.
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Be non-judgmental. Respect their decisions. There are many reasons
why victims stay in abusive relationships. They may leave and return to
the relationship many times. Do not criticize their decisions or try to
guilt them. They will need your support even more during those times.
How Can I Help?
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Encourage them to participate in activities outside of the
relationship with friends and family.
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If they end the relationship, continue to be supportive of them.
Even though the relationship was abusive, they may still feel sad and
lonely once it is over. They will need time to mourn the loss of the
relationship and will especially need your support at that time.
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Help them develop a safety plan.
How Can I Help?
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Encourage them to talk to people who can provide help and
guidance. Contact the DV Response Team here at PMC. Encourage
them to contact a local domestic violence agency that provides
counseling or support groups.
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Remember that you cannot "rescue" them. Although it is difficult to
see someone you care about get hurt, ultimately the person getting hurt
has to be the one to decide that they want to do something about it. It's
important for you to support them and help them find a way to safety
and peace.
How Can I Help?
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Keep your conversations confidential. Although it is tempting to
elicit the help of other care partners, confidentiality is important. Many
times the individual is embarrassed and does not want others to know.
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Avoid telling them to leave. They need to have a safety plan in place
first. Leaving is the most dangerous time for a victim. Encourage them
to seek assistance. They can start by contacting the DV Response
Team at PMC.
Domestic Violence is a Cycle
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Remember that many victims who are abused will return to their
abuser.
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DO NOT JUDGE THEM!
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Continue to provide support and be available to them, even if they go
back. They need you even more.
Finding Help in the Community
There are 3 shelters in Brevard County:
• The Salvation Army: 321-631-2764
• Serene Harbor: 321-726-8282
• Women’s Center: 321-242-3110
You can also reach them by calling 211
You can also have them call the Florida Domestic Violence Hotline at 1800-500-1119.
Finding Help in the Community
• Brevard County may
provide other services to
domestic violence victims
such as relocation
assistance, legal aid, and
protective orders.
National Resources for Domestic Violence
• National Domestic Violence Hotline
– 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
– www.ndvh.org
Speak Up
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If you suspect that someone you know is being abused, speak up!
Expressing your concern will let the person know that you care and may
even save their life.
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Talk to the person in private. Point out the things you’ve noticed that
cause concern. Reassure them that you’re there to talk if/when they want
to. Reassure them that you’ll keep these conversations private. Let them
know that PMC has a Domestic Violence Response Team who is willing
to confidentially meet with them.
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Remember, abusers are very good at controlling and manipulating their
victims. Abused and battered women/men are depressed, drained,
scared, ashamed, and confused. They need help to get out, yet they have
often been isolated from their family and friends. By picking up on the
warning signs and offering support, you can help them escape an abusive
situation and begin healing.
Belmonte, Joelle. Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive
Relationships. Help Guide.org (www.helpguide.org). 2001-2008. Web. 25 September 2009.
Local Resources for Abusers
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Call 211 for local resources
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PMC care partners and their family members can call the Employee
Assistance Program, Horizon at 800-2727-7252 for confidential
individual and family counseling for a variety of issues including anger
management, stress and anxiety issues with family, stress from marital
problems, separation or divorce, depression and difficult times in
relationships.
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Call the Department of Children and Families “Certified Batterer
Intervention Program” at 321-632-5792.
Survey
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Please click this link to complete a brief 3 question survey about the
content of this Domestic Violence course (survey will open in a new
window)
Survey
Summary
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Domestic violence can happen to women, men, or children.
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PMC is committed to assisting care partners who have been abused.
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Care partners can find help by talking to you. Please make sure they
know that they can come to you.
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Brevard County offers a range of support services as well
References
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Glenda Martin, Victim Advocate, Brevard County Sheriff’s Office
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Kanel, Kristi. A Guide to Crisis Intervention. Brooks/Cole. 1999.
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www.leg.state.fl.us/
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www.ndvh.org
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http://www.helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs
_causes_effects.htm
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http://www.dv.dcf.state.fl.us
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