Transcript No Slide Title

12th November 2013
“A courtroom is a barbaric venue in
which to pick over the carcass of a
failed marriage”
Fiona Shackleton –
Barrister for Sir Paul McCartney
Some of the reasons people come to mediation
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I am contacting you for advice on how I go about mediation between me
and my daughters mother. We just can't seem to come to any agreement at
all that suits us both: its always ending in arguments please could you contact
me as soon as possible on how I go about this
My husband and I have been separated for 1 month. Selling our
home and would like help with finances etc. Our split remains very
amicable. Could someone call to make an appointment for both
please
I have recently split up with my sons father. He is refusing to
speak with me and when he has my son I can’t contact him. He
refuses to talk to me about any issues concerning our son and as
there are many things that need to be discussed it is causing me
to become rather stressed
I need help to communicate with my son's mother over access
and court order issues. I don’t want to return to the court
system and feel that we should be able to work things out
directly...can you help please?
Most separating couples are kind, decent
and intelligent people who want to
maintain their self-respect and dignity.
These are good people at the
worst time in their lives. Often, they
are not proud of their behaviour.
They would like to feel that they
have treated their partner fairly,
done what was best for their
children, and amicably resolved
their differences.
Who needs mediation?
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Divorce stats: in 2011 117,588 divorces
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Separating couples & parents: the myth of
‘common law marriage’
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2.9 million non-married couples
Children – over 100,000 in 2011
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42% of couples married in 2011are likely to divorce
By child’s 15th birthday 93% married couples still together, 7% of
unmarried couples
Costs £46billion per annum
Negotiation …
Recognises the parties’ common goals for
their family.
 Encourages empathy.
 Acknowledges the fact that the parties will
be connected well into the future, even
though they are no longer married/partners.
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Mediation is a process to help couples
to make changes when they have
decided not to live together. It is
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voluntary
impartial
confidential, except….
legally privileged
Mediation is about:
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mutual problem-solving
the present and the future, not
the past
legal information NOT legal
advice
Mediation deals with
Children
 where the children will live/when they
will see their other parent
 schools/doctors/holidays/birthdays/
christmas
 pocket money/friends/sleep-overs
 homework/discipline/boundaries
 extended families
 introducing new partners
 etc,etc etc
…and
Finances
 house/mortgage/loans
 income/savings
 child
and spousal maintenance
 pensions
 credit cards/bank loans/other debts
 Tenancy
Can be complex, but rarely is in practice. Referral to
Financial Advisor if required, eg company valuations
Can we mediate when there has been
domestic abuse/violence?
Yes, but….
How mediation helps –
a dvd from National Family Mediation
Dealing with separation
Legal aid for mediation
Still exists – even after April 2013
 Two-stage test: capital & income
 Covers all costs if eligible
 NOT reclaimed after settlement (The
Statutory Charge)
 For details see
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 GOV.UK
website – for general guidance
Fees
For those who don’t qualify our costs are published
in our leaflet and on our website
 HFM – What will it cost?
we aim
toincome
be clear
and transparent
Gross
Typical max*
Planning
Mediation
(1hr)
(1½hrs)
< £20k
£80
£120
£500
£20-30k
£90
£135
£555
£30-50k
£110
£165
£665
£50-75k
£120
£180
£720
> £75k
£140
£210
£830
Top rate fees apply where joint assets exceed £1m
MOU Fee £60
Parenting Plan £30
*90% of cases finish in four sessions or fewer (fee quoted
includes MOU). Complex cases may need more sessions.
Why are MIAMs important?
Mediation Information and Assessment Meetings
 Expected
and very strongly encouraged under the
Pre-Application Protocol
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will become compulsory when Children and
Families Bill comes into force – April 2014
individual will be required to have attempted
mediation before they can go to court
Children in mediation
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Children have a part in most
mediations
Parents can agree that they
both want what is best for
children – even if they
disagree about what this
Focus on views and needs
of children
Children are routinely offered the chance to have their
own meeting with the mediator
 Their opportunity to ask questions, express
worries, suggest ideas
 Not responsible for adult decisions – and they
don’t have to choose
 Parents only hear what the children want them to
hear
Outcome of child consultation
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Parents/children: listening to one another/
being considered
Written record of session if desired
Plans formulated/confirmed in ongoing
mediation
We find that most clients…
Can work together to gather the necessary
information to resolve their case.
 Want to spend their money on themselves
and their children rather than on lawyers
and court fees, so they’re willing to do
homework.
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Mediation
and Litigation
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Litigation can be
demoralising,
dehumanising, and
destructive to
families.
Litigation is a
“Blame Game.”
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Mediation changes
the focus from WHO
is at fault, to HOW to
SOLVE the problem.
Is about creating the
future you want
Successful outcome of mediation
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Couple learns to communicate about the issues
Focus on children and putting their needs first
Recognise importance of adapting to changes, especially in
their children
Equipped to deal with future issues – and know they can
return to mediation
Clients say…
They want to
get through
the divorce
process as
quickly and
painlessly as
possible.
Statistics show…
The average
mediation
case is
completed in
17 WEEKS;
the average
litigated
divorce takes
17 MONTHS.
Why Mediation?
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Mediation can help [separating couples] settle
disputes more cheaply, more quickly and less
acrimoniously than is possible either through the
courts or through legal representation
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Since clients could take into consideration the
individual needs of their family when exploring
options this could help lead to more workable long
term arrangements, particularly with regard to
children, and the decisions made are the clients’,
not imposed by the court
National Audit Office:
“Legal aid and mediation for people involved in family breakdown” March
2007
And because we don’t want this!
What can we do for you today?
Offer to attend a team briefing/workshop
with your frontline staff - one of 12
mediators
 Send information for you to pass to your
clients
Happy to accept referrals or enquiries at
any time
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How to refer to HFM
 Call us – 0845 230 9818/02392 433388
 Ask client to call us using one of these numbers
 Website
Self-referral form
Callback request
Any questions?
For further information see our website
www.hantsfamilymediation.org.uk
or call us
02392 433388