Transcript Diversity in the Classroom

Interpersonal
Communication
(a presentation by Sally A. Bishai, Ph.D.)
What ARE Interpersonal Relationships,
Anyway?
 2+

peeps
Dyadic
 Interdependent
 Consistent
 Over
time
Importance of IR: 3 Needs
(Schutz, 1976; p. 136 in text)
 Inclusion
& involvement
 Affection
 Control
& tenderness
& influencing stuff
Two Types of Interpersonal Relationships
 Complementary

Math + English=The Perfect Person (?!)
 Symmetrical

Math gurus all!
Self-Disclosure + Uncle Johari
(Please refer to the lovely figure on p. 141)
 I.
Open (you and me)
 II. Blind (I am)
 III. Hidden (skeletons in my closet?)
 IV. Unknown (you and me)
Why Begin a Relationship,
Then?
 It
may be any one of the following (p.
150):





Proximity

Neighbour, co-worker

Wow, what a babe!

Yay, they like me!

We both love RPGS, goody!

I’ll help you with your term paper if you do my
algebra..!
Attractiveness
Responsiveness
Similarity
Complementarity
Things are Hunky Dory…Right?

Motivations for TERMINATING relationships (boo hoo):
 Hurtful (and BEASTLY) messages

Deception (liar, liar, pants on fire…)

Aggressiveness (me: shoe, you: doormat)

Argumentativeness (“beyetkhani2 ma3 debban
weshhoo!”)

Defensiveness (imagine a cornered beast)

That would be the DENOTATIVE meaning of “beast”
Personal Idioms (p.156)
A
“culture of two”
 Unique
nicknames
 Unique
language

Come up with THREE of these that you’ve
seen, heard, and/or imagined!
Rituals
(but not the religious kind; p. 157)
 Couple-time/Communication

Dinner @ Taco Bell every Thursday night
 Idiomatic/symbolic

rituals
Calling her “Angel” because she saved
your life!
 Daily

rituals
routines/tasks
She cooks, he cleans
More Fun Rituals
 Intimacy

rituals
“I jst klld 2say eyeLVu” every night @9pm
 Patterns/habits/mannerisms


She always accompanies him to the Dr.
because he hates check-ups, and
He brushes her waist-length tresses because
she has Frozen Shoulder
 Spiritual


rituals
Going to church together
Bonding over twice-daily yoga and pilates
Androgyny
 Rocks
(?!)
 Is
when a person has (or uses) elements of
the MALE and the FEMALE
 Can
result in the MOST SUCCESSFUL
relationships (if you’re androgynous, I
mean)
Intercultural
Communication
another presentation by
Sally A. Bishai, Ph.D.
Activity: Culture ShockED

Think of a time when you found yourself in an
unfamiliar situation, such as a new:





Job
Relationship
Educational situation
Country (long-term)
Briefly analyse that time in your life and:



Identify the differences between previous
situations and the one in question;
Explain what the biggest conflicts seemed to be;
Briefly describe HOW the conflict was resolved (if it
was).
Goals of Co-Cultural
Communication (p.171)

Assimilation Goal


Accommodation Goal


“Hmm, what can I do to fit in with ‘them’?”
“My culture rocks, but ‘they’ have a right to their
own culture, too! We can all get along, right?”
Separation Goal

“Begone, you hellish beasts! We ain’t talking to
anyone outside of our group!”
IC Problems (p. 171)
 Ethnocentrism


Mini-skirts
Tents (neqab)
 Cultural


Relativism
Saddam Hussein?
Yanomamo Indians
More IC Problems (or are they? p.
172)
 Stereotyping

All _____s are good at ______
 Prejudice

Someone “just like me”
 Discrimination

Tomatoes, oranges, and “gourmet” food
Additional Barriers (not in book)
General
Problem
Specific Obstructions
Communication
Don’t know what they’re saying at all (language)
Don’t know what they mean (jargon, regionalisms)
Offense
Making a gesture that’s OK back home, but vulgar here
Making an overture (or joke) that’s “out of line” here
Failing to follow a ritual or convention of theirs
“Legality”
Fear of doing something illegal (unwittingly)
Possibility of not doing something required
Isolation
Fear of making mistakes (language)
Apprehension of drawing laughs (at mistakes)
Worry over offending people
Cultural Orientation
(Hofstede, 1980; p. 174 in book)
Individualism
–“Me” mentality
–“What’s best for me”
–Independence
–Adults don’t generally
need approval
–Clarity valued
–Context, back-story,
details = clinginess (“TMI”)
+ fluff
–“No dice.”
Collectivism
–“We” mentality
–Common good
–Interdependence
–You’re not an adult if
you’re not married!
–Ambiguity treasured
–Context, back-story,
details = helpful +
inclusive
–Exceptions, “case-bycase,” + personal appeals
Culture and Uncertainty (p.
176)
 Uncertainty-ACCEPTING


“General principles rock”
“We don’t need a rule for EVERYTHING, do
we?!”
 Uncertainty-REJECTING



More rules
More questions
More REJECTION for uncertainty!
Rules and Culture
 Implicit-Rule
Culture
 Rules
IMPLIED, we already know them,
they’re part of what we are (and can’t
easily be changed)
 More
polite
 Less aggressive
 More accommodating
 Explicit-Rule
Culture
 Clear
rules and expectations (which are
TOLD and may be negotiated)
 Less
combative
 Less willing to please
 Less concerned about offending others
Chronemics (Hall, 1959, 1983)
Monochronic
“One thing at a time.”
Time is compartmentalised
Late = bad
Work wrules!
“To-Do List” mentality
Stress = not completing tasks
“Focused”
Polychronic
Multitasking
Time is fluid
“I’ll get there when I get there.”
Relationships rock!
ADHD mentality
Stress over offending someone
“Distractible”
NOTE!
 The
next few slides contain information
that is NOT CONTAINED in the BOOK!!
Communication Context
(Hall, 1976; Hofstede, 1980)
Low-Context
High-Context
Depends on what is SAID
Take words at “face value,” for the words
said are the only things that count
–Depends on a shared code
–The code often seems “arbitrary”
Work backward, however, and you
might get it!
–Nonverbals often count
–Seemingly-tiny details might be the key
Words trump demeanour
–Those “not in the know” might
suspect HC communicators of:
Paranoia (“I’ll bet the other person
didn’t even notice!”)
Obsession (“Give it a rest,
already!”)
Psychosis (“That doesn’t make
sense…illogical much?!”)
Directness + Indirectness
Direct
Emphasis = clarity and being
understood
“Taking the bull by the horns”
No deduction needed, coz they
said it!
Indirect
Emphasis = saving face of everyone
involved
“Dancing around the issue”
Can be deduced by hints in the message
They Think WHAT?!
Direct think that Indirect are:
Evasive
Dishonest
Wishy-washy
Indecisive
Increase tension by hiding from
the issue
Indirect think that Direct are:
Insensitive
Tactless
Boorish
Harsh
Increase tension by dealing too
directly with the issue at hand