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Awareness to Action: What Adults Can Do to Prevent Child Sexual Abuse April 20, 2011 www.StopItNow.org Sarita Hudson Yvonne Cournoyer Director of Public Engagement [email protected] Program Director [email protected] © 2011 Agenda • Stop It Now!'s resources for prevention • Research on what US adults think about child sexual abuse and what it means for taking action • Practical steps you can take to prevent abuse before a child is harmed Dial In for Audio Toll-free: 866.740.1260 U.S. Toll: 303.248.0285 Access Code: 5873500 ReadyTalk support: 800-843-9166 © 2011 Poll-What would you rather do than talk about child sexual abuse? • Clean the bathroom • Run 5 miles • Stand in line at a government office (DMV, IRS, Social Security) • Call/wait for customer service for computer, cellphone, etc • Start a diet • Pay your bills • Organize files © 2011 Results What would you rather do than talk about child sexual abuse? Organize files Clean the bathroom Run 5 miles Pay your bills Clean up after a pet Start a diet Call/wait for customer service Stand in a long line 0% 10% © 2011 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% Collaboration Child Protection Criminal Justice Media Victim advocacy Public Health Businesses Schools Faith Communities Others? Can you name others? © 2011 Today’s Participants • • • • Parents Child Welfare Child Advocacy Center Rape Crisis/Sexual Assault Recovery • Health care providers • Domestic Violence • Child Care Provider • Child Abuse or Sexual Violence Prevention • Therapists • Family Support • Crisis Intervention • Law enforcement • Sales © 2011 Adults Are Accountable Children Have a Right to Safety and Well-being Adults Protecting Children © 2011 Prevention is Possible • “Let’s join together to create an environment where adults take action to prevent sexual abuse before a child is harmed.” © 2011 What Does Adult Responsibility Look Like? Your questions… • Why don’t kids tell? • Why do adults allow the burden to be placed on the children? • How much emphasis should be on kids protecting themselves versus parents keeping their kids safe? © 2011 Adults have to be prepared first… Now! Approach • Public Health/Root causes • Adults protecting children-focus adult and community responsibility • Inclusive/Accountability and Understanding • Hope • Research-based • Avoid use of labels if possible © 2011 Stop It Now! Impact • Pioneering adult responsibility • Collaboration with the CDC/national public health agency—see this as a preventable public health problem • Collaboration with National Sex Offender Registry to offer prevention information • Community-based pilot programs • Market research data adult attitudes, opinions & behaviors about child sexual abuse © 2011 Programs • • • • • Prevention Education and Advocacy Help Services Training and Technical Assistance Policy and Advocacy Research and Evaluation © 2011 International Collaborations Princess Olufemi-Kayode, President/CEO, Media Concern Initiative for Women and Children © 2011 What do US Adults Think about Child Sexual Abuse: Measures of Knowledge and Attitudes Among Six States © 2011 Prevalence of Child Sexual Abuse Survivorship © 2011 Knowledge of Who Sexually Abuses Children © 2011 Hypothetical Situation of Child Sexual Abuse © 2011 Actual Situations © 2011 Views on Treatment for Child Sexual Offending © 2011 Key Interpretations 1. Disconnect between informed awareness of the issue & recognition of risk in daily life. 2. Majority are aware, knowledgeable & concerned about the issue. 3. Higher percentage of adults who have experienced childhood sexual abuse are aware & knowledgeable. 4. Majority support treatment for those who have offended. 5. Majority support sex offender policies like residency restrictions and sex offender registry. 6. Prevalence rates consistent with other research. © 2011 Your questions… • How can we get people to listen? So often, people shut me out as soon as I mention childhood sexual abuse. © 2011 Spectrum of Prevention Primary Secondary Tertiary Prevent abuse before a child is harmed Act on concerning behaviors or situations Prevent re-occurrence of abuse © 2011 Cycle of Prevention Recognizing risky situations and taking action Modeling positive behaviors Reporting abuse and getting help for all © 2011 Your questions…GREEN • What are some protective behaviors I can take? © 2011 • Don’t wait Talking to our kids - Sometimes we just need a little push to get us started. Poll: Parents, what keeps you from talking to your kids? • • • • • • Not knowing what to say Fear they’ll grow up too soon Fear of what I’ll hear Fear of questions I can’t answer Embarrassment Don’t want to scare children © 2011 Results Parents, what keeps you from talking to your kids about safety from sexual abuse? Don't want to scare children Not knowing what to say Fear they'll grow up too soon Fear of questions I can't answer Embarrassment Fear of what I'll hear 0% 10% © 2011 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% Your questions…GREEN • How can we impart this education without scaring the adults or children? • How do I keep my 3yr old safe and teach her without creating fear. • How can we make sure that children feel safe to speak? © 2011 © 2009 Poll: what might keep you from speaking up about inappropriate behaviors • • • • • • • • • Fear of family break-up Community pressure Fear of violence Fear of involving authorities Belief that things will sort out Inability to face it/disbelief Fear of loss of financial security Stigma/shame Afraid person will retaliate © 2011 Results What might keep you from talking with someone whose behavior towards children concerns you? Afraid person will retaliate Fear of violence Fear of family break-up Inability to face it/disbelief Stigma/shame Fear of involving authorities Fear of loss of financial security Belief that things will sort out Community pressure 0% 10% 20% 30% 40% 50% 60% 70% © 2011 Your questions…YELLOW • What are the signs of sexual abuse in young children? • As a parent, I am keen to know the signs should a child be sexually abused, especially when being abused by a close family member such as a father, grandfather or uncle. © 2011 © 2009 © 2009 Warning Signs in Adults or Adolescents at Risk • Makes others uncomfortable by violating boundaries and rules • Makes excuses for harmful behavior • Inability to recognize what is appropriate in relationships with children • Encourages secrecy • Sexual interest is directed towards children © 2011 Your questions…YELLOW • I can't describe [situation where concerned about inappropriate behaviors]. In my view, abusers create a curtain of smoke around them: you are really flabbergasted when a child speaks out and you know the abuser, because you never ever had seen or suspected anything. © 2011 Why We Don’t Suspect • Private behavior can be very different than public behavior • Socially skilled • Our own stereotypes • What if we allow ourselves to “consider the possibility” © 2007 Fears that stop us… • What if I’m wrong? • Angry response from individual, family community • Loss of relationship • Children will be impacted • What if I’m right? © 2007 Your questions…YELLOW • How do we have conversations (literally, what to say) with people (youth and adults) who we believe may be at risk for causing harm? • What are specific actions that adults can take when they witness inappropriate behavior in other adults? © 2011 Let’s Talk “Conversations do not have to be confrontations. It is too easy to lash out in fear or anger, especially if you are afraid of what you might hear. Planning how you want to talk may be as important as what you will say.” Advice from a counselor © 2011 Let’s Talk • • • • • • • Prepare Find an ally Practice Speak up early Use “I” statements Describe—don’t label Just start © 2011 Let’s Talk-Individuals • Share your feelings – “I feel uncomfortable bringing this up.” • Describe the behavior – “I notice you tickling Jamal even after he says stop” • Share your reaction – “I want you to respect Jamal’s no and stop.” • Set boundaries – “If you can’t stop when he says no, don’t start.” © 2007 Let’s Talk-Organizations • Describe the behavior – “Yesterday your door was closed when you were meeting the Maria.” • Share your reaction – “It is our policy that you keep your door open when meeting with children.” • Set boundaries – “I realize it can be noisy, but you still need to keep your door open when meeting with children.” © 2007 Talk & Act • Monitor the situation • Engage others to help monitor © 2007 Speaking up…YELLOW • I have witnessed an adult joking and asking questions of my teenage daughters that were sexual in nature. • I interrupted and stated that I didn't feel it was appropriate. The conversation stopped. © 2011 Speaking up… YELLOW • My two boys (5 and 8 years old) being very physical--lying on top of each other-that makes me feel uncomfortable. Am I over-reacting to separate them as soon as I see? • My husband knows I'm overly concerned so I tend to over-react. I've worked with many a person who's under-reacted and I don't want to do that. © 2011 Context of Sexual Behaviors • Differences in power – e.g., age, size, physical or mental abilities • Intimidation – e.g., status or misuse of authority • Manipulation – e.g., games, tricks, bribes, verbal persuasion • Coercion – e.g., threats, physical force, weapons • Secrecy – e.g., covering up, demanding silence • Obsessive-ness – e.g., preoccupation with sexual thoughts • Compulsiveness – e.g., repetitive, lack of control (Adapted from Burton, Rasmussen, et al., 1998) © 2011 Your questions…RED • What can I do as a parent to help my children heal from their abuse and to prevent them both from abusing in the future. • Are there effective programs established, that help the non-abusive parent learn better ways of keeping their child safe from further sexual abuse? © 2011 Your questions…RED • What success rate is there in the rehabilitating of child molesters? what is the best technique/style of counseling? © 2011 Training for professionals www.StopItNow.org/resources • Training on working with children who have been abused: – – – – National Children’s Advocacy Center, http://www.nationalcac.org/ National Child Protection Training Center, http://www.ncptc.org/ Child Welfare League of America, http://www.cwla.org/ National Children’s Alliance, http://www.nationalchildrensalliance.org/ • Training on working with youth with sexual behavior problems: – – NEARI, http://neari.com/ Kempe Center, http://www.kempe.org/ • Training on working with adults with sexual interest in children – – Association for the Treatment of Sexual Abusers, http://atsa.com/ Child Molestation Research & Prevention Institute, http://www.childmolestationprevention.org/ © 2011 Speaking up…RED • a child discloses information during a school presentation that seems suspect/inappropriate • notify the principal and make sure it is followed through © 2011 A Role for Everyone Societal: Encourage policies that require training on child sexual abuse prevention in addition to criminal background checks. Societal Community Community: Sponsor a workshop or Community Dialogue for your community. Relationship Individual Relationship: Learn how to talk to someone whose behavior around children concerns you. © 2011 Individual: Educate yourself about warning signs. Your questions…COMMUNITY • How can I train/inform mentors/parents/child care providers in prevention? • How can I educate the community on this issue? • Since I don't have kids, and neither do most of my friends, how can I make a difference for other children in my community © 2011 Speaking up… COMMUNITY • Creating awareness among school nurses on the value of sexual health educational programs for school students and about the integration of a new role for them, in this area… © 2011 Speaking up…COMMUNITY • Respected leader accused of abuse but case went nowhere • Started awareness activities on sexual abuse though youth in the community, building on the existed resources and traditional practices. • Could only mobilize the youth as they are very motivated but other actors in the community seem not interested in this issue/ prevention © 2011 Prevention Education www.StopItNow.org © 2011 HELP SERVICES Helpline 1.888.Prevent Help Emails Online Help Center © 2011 Ask Now! Online Advice Column Poll-How will you use what you’ve learned today? • • • • • • • Talk to your child(ren) Talk to your spouse Talk to a friend Talk to a colleague Talk to a client Blog or tweet about what you’ve learned Download a tip sheet and share it © 2011 Results How will you use what you've learned today? Download a tip sheet and share it Talk to a colleague Talk to a friend Talk to a client Talk to your spouse Talk to your child(ren) Blog/tweet about it 0% 20% © 2011 40% 60% 80% 100% Thank you Contact: Yvonne Cournoyer Sarita Hudson [email protected] [email protected] © 2011