Transcript The “Jungle” - The Goat Locker (USN/USCG)

The “Jungle”
A guide to Navy ranks
Gazelles = Ensigns
• Although easily frightened, they have been
known to stupidly lounge in plain sight of
the “lions”
• Runs at high speeds, with no purpose or
direction
• The slow and weak are frequently slain
Cheetah = Lieutenant Junior Grade
• Loner, feisty
• Makes the occasional kill on a weaker
animal
Lions = Lieutenant
• Hunts in packs
• Can bring down a larger animal with
coordination
• Easily slays the “cheetah”
Water Buffalo = Lieutenant Commander
• Aging, slower beast, but• Cannot be brought down by a single “Lion”
Hippopotamus = Commander
• Slow and cumbersome on land
• Safe in own environment
• Lays low to avoid enemies
Elephants = Captain
• Rules the “Jungle”
• Impossible to bring down except by his
own vials.
Hyena = Chiefs
• Laughs continuously at the “Cheetah”
• Helps the “Lions” complete the kill on
larger animals
Sloth = Warrant Officer
• Skilled in one area only
• Comes around only to feed and take care of
bodily functions
Dung Beetle = Petty Officers
• Forced to deal with the “crap” created by
other animals
Sand Crab = GS Employee
• Side-steps responsibility.
• Has a hard shell which cannot be cracked, even
by elephants.
• Immune to dung beetles.
Ant = Contract Employee
• Lowest on the food chain.
• Extremely productive, but can be eliminated by
even a cheetah.
• Dung beetles like to play with them.