Honest Mormon Nuttiness
What happens when you finish the
quote, apply the logic elsewhere, or
use the full context.
What is Nutty History?
"Well, we have nothing to hide. Our history is an open book. They may find what they are
looking for, but the fact is the history of the church is clear and open and leads to faith and
strength and virtues." -Gordon B. Hinkley
Anti-Mormon- Making things up or skewing
events to hurt the Church
Pro-Mormon- Making things up or skewing
events to help the Church
History- What actually happened
Nutty History- What actually happened, but not
fully represented (It was too nutty to share)
Updates to Nutty Mormon History 1
Polygamy (bonus)- Ruining a reputation:
Joseph Smith's Nauvoo Bar in the Mansion House- Emma comes home from furniture trip.
Orrin Porter Rockwell is running the bar and she says, "Bar goes, or I and children go." Bar is
While Emma is away, Joseph Smith marries Lucy Walker, the maid, one day after
her seventeenth birthday. Commanded, she was angry and insulted, Smith warned
if she rejected the "principle" of plural marriage, "the gate will be closed forever
"Emma Smith… did not consent to the marriage; she did not know anything about
it at all.“ ”[Co]habitated with him as such.” "It was not a love matter.”
"[My father] left me to reflect upon it for the next twenty four hours. ... I was
sceptical - one minute believed, then doubted. I thought of the love and
tenderness that he felt for his only daughter, and I knew that he would not cast
me off, and this was the only convincing proof That I had of its being right."
Marry-me-in-24-hours-or-else-your-salvation-is-forfeight is mustache twirling evil.
• 1835 copy of Book of Commandments says that Oliver
Cowdery had “power of the Rod,” changed to “rod of
• FAIR/FARMS response- The reference was later changed to the "gift of Aaron,"
but we can only speculate as to the exact reason why.
• Father Smith consecrated dousing rods in the Kirtland
temple before a treasure hunt in 1836 (Quinn, D. Michael, The
Mormon Hierarchy: Origins of Power, Appendix 7: Selected Chronology of the Church of
Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints).
• Coffins turned into canes for the 12.
• Oliver Cowdery’s rod turned into Brigham’s Cane.
• Willard Richards temple cane->
• Casket cane
• Orson Hyde Jerusalem Cane->
• Brigham Young cane, short,
• Black, silver handle- Oliver’s?
Harold B. Lee’s religion
John W. Taylor, the faithful scandal
J. Golden Kimball and a man with a dream
George Q. Cannon and a quarter million dollars
David Whitmer, second prophet of the restoration, was right
Joseph Smith III and Hinckley’s dirty little secret
Bowie knives in the temple
Razor blades, throats, and temple oaths
Rocky Mountains over a barrel
King Follett Discourse (rings and things)
White horses and civil wars
• Witness Testimonies
Declaration signers all had different hand writing
Witnesses all have the same (Signed by Oliver Cowdery
Crossdressing General Authorities
• “February 11, 1886. Soon after our marriage the President of the Church, Wilford
Woodruff, came to live with us…I made him a Mother Hubbard dress and a
sunbonnet like we used to wear and when it came breakfast time, I would go up in
the garden and trees and vines and dress him up in the dress and bonnet and
disguise him so he could come to the house.”
• “He got away with this for a long time, but one US marshall got suspicious and
waited by the barn for Wilford to return from his morning ritual. When Wilford
rounded the corner of the barn, the marshall met him face to face and saw
through his disguise.”
• In 1890, after his release from custody, he issued the manifesto that brought the
Mormon practice of plural marriage to an end, and it was under his leadership
that the church began its withdrawal from domination of social, political, and
economic life in Utah.
• Patriarch role (D. Michael Quinn ultimate source)
• October 8, 1946 - Joseph Fielding Smith (not the prophet), great-grandson of Hyrum Smith,
released as patriarch due to homosexual activity (after Smith's death, it was discovered that
the patriarch had been involved in a homosexual affair with a 21-year-old U.S. Navy sailor).
• Heber J. Grant asks 12 to pray and consider carefully who should be the successor to Hyrum
G. Smith, Sr. (Mar. 16 1933).
• Heber declares that God chose the gay man in a long speech detailing praying on the subject.
“Conversation between E. Gary Smith and Eldred Smith on April 11, 1983,” April 12, 1983
• [President Heber J. Grant Diary] Had a chat with George F. Richards and then one with
Joseph Fielding Smith. Called each one for support and told them the other already
supported his decision.
Gay Patriarchs (cont’d)
• Heber’s diary also says that Mary T. Smith told Joseph F. Smith
(patriarch) that the patriarch belonged to his line, and not the John
• [President Heber J. Grant Diary, Oct 25, 1942 ] By request of Joseph
F. Smith, he gave his first patriarchal blessing as Patriarch to the
Church to Heber J. Grant.
• [President Heber J. Grant Diary, Feb 27, 1943] “I think it was an
inspiration not to choose John Smith's great grandson to be the
patriarch… at one time a majority of the Quorum of the Twelve felt
that I ought to choose one of John Smith's great grandsons. It has
been a very humiliating thing to me to have the majority of the
brethren wanting me to choose a man who felt he was entitled to
it, but [now]…all say they are willing to sustain Joseph F. Smith for
Gay Patriarchs (cont’d)
• Eldred G. Smith is advised by President Heber J. Grant that
Joseph F. Smith II will be Patriarch the next day instead of
• Mar 15, 1948 - Frank Evans given a letter instructing Joseph F.
should be paid up to March 1.
• Apr 10, 1947 - Eldred G. Smith ordained Partriarch – “oops!”
• 1979 - Eldred Smith was released from active duties and
designated “Patriarch Emeritus.” After his release, Smith
often spoke at firesides, where he displayed artifacts from
Joseph and Hyrum’s lives. He was no longer sustained as
“prophet, seer, and revelator” as he was from 1947-1979.
What is LDS Belief
• Family Home Evening
• Home teaching
• Father leads in the home
• Welfare program
• Priesthood authority
• “Every week, no matter what chapel you’re in, it’s
the same lesson”
• PR Department declaring doctrine instead of prophet
• Religion founded by Joseph Smith, Jr.
Harold B. Lee’s Religion
• Harold B. Lee surviving was difficult
• Pan of lye at eight years old, and he nearly bled to death.
• Lee taught a class of 25 in 1916 for $60/month.
• Sept. 1920 - Heber J. sent 21 year-old Lee on a mission to HQ in Denver, Colorado.
• Marriages: While on his mission, Lee met a sister missionary from Utah, Fern Lucinda Tanner.
They married on November 14, 1923 in the Salt Lake Temple. Fern died in 1962 and, on June
17, 1963, Lee married Freda Joan Jensen, a former mission companion's girlfriend.
• Stake President (1930): Excommunicating fundamentalists following Ivins and Crowley’s
teachings. Joseph White Musser (son of church historian, page 392).
• Welfare Program: He established a welfare program to aid members in distress that became
a model emulated by the entire LDS Church. In 1932 he organized the Bishop’s Storehouse.
In 1936, J. Reuben Clark placed him as director of Church Welfare. Called as an apostle in
1941 (Spencer W. and Mark E called in 1944). Any quotes about welfare before this period
are due to correlation. Christmas eve boy-coat story (Harold B. Lee, Ye Are the Light of the
World [Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1974], pp. 346–47).
• “All-Church Coordinating Council”: (ACCC) formed by letter from First Presidency to the
General Priesthood Committee in March 1960. Similar formed in 1912, 1920, and 1938. Its
charter was to remove duplicate manuals and nothing else.
Setting the Stage - How did this happen?
• McKay and Hugh B. Brown were ailing. Everyone knew Lee
was going to be prophet for 20 years or more and did what he
• First Counselor Henry D. Moyle lacked the confidence of the
apostles and was effectively exiled to Florida, which is why
the church owns .07% of Florida and has a beef ranch there.
He died in 1963.
• President David O. McKay established a “Correlation
Executive Committee.” Lee was called to be the chairman.
• "He wasn't inclined to be overly taken in by the Church's own
bureaucracy.“ – Neal A. Maxwell. Hires new unknowns and
promotes rapidly (Hinckley, Romney, Monson, Packer).
• By tacking “Priesthood” onto any already existing area, it
suddenly fell under correlation’s jurisdiction.
Setting the Stage - How did this happen?
• Smaller groups had only magazine subscriptions for
funding. By controlling the magazine, the
organization was controlled.
• Everything was done in the name of God.
• McKay believed in agency over everything, even in
allowing agency to be taken away.
• McKay was ill and threatened by radical groups. The
Correlation Committee provided him with letters to
sign that authorized the calling of Regional
If the source was too easy to find, cite the Deseret News that quoted the original
source instead. Deseret News was harder to find than the JoD in those days, but now
we have the internet. Most “Anti-Mormon” citations are really just unraveling
Hugh Nibley’s rules for writing Anti-Mormon Literature
• Rule 8: “Avoid footnotes.”
• Rule 31: “Learn to be silent. Nothing you say can be more damning than
what you fail to say.”
• Rule 32: “Be bloody, bold and resolute! What the public wants in an
atrocity story is straight horror.” (Haun’s mill, Handcart stories, various
• Rule 33: “Uphold tradition! Correct and improve the legends.” Conference
talks citing other conference talks citing other talks…
• Rule 34: “Be patriotic.”
• Rule 36: “Your target is to promote Mormonism! Correlated manuals
are not written to describe or discuss the human foibles of any group
or individual but to promote the doctrine.”
"To generate historically contrived, but presently acceptable,
seemingly historically rooted manuals. History could thus be
made familiarized, and change erased." - Daymon Smith
They hire researches to survey… It is carefully, scientifically engineered
The point of the manual is to make it such that, in the teacher’s mind, the Church has always
taught the same thing, and it seamlessly marches along. They make it seem as though all the
prophets operated under the Correlation Department, even though they didn't.
• By the late 1950s: Rapid growth (internal studies predicted 10,000,000
members by 2000) and was the first Church leader to link the problem of
growth with loss of control, and possible doctrinal dilution. Control of
budget meant control of programs.
• 1961: Conference is devoted to talks about correlation. Harold B. Lee
quoted Paul and then gave a modern context, thus using correlated
thought to justify correlation. Brown’s talk seemed to oppose. McKay
proclaimed, “I think this has been a glorious meeting—one of the best, if
not the best, ever held in the Church. There is a glorious future.”
• Plan outlined in fall 1962, to be fully implemented by 1964.
• 1962: Call for Home Teacher Program to check on progress of every
family once a month for welfare and correlation purposes (beginning of
“every member a missionary”).
• Lee argued that the group must not only handle the “What” of the
manual, but the “How.”
• Family Home Evening: Monday evening was set aside for this activity, and
all other church activities were called off.
• “Sometimes auxiliary instructions were in defiance and in contradiction to
instructions” (McKay 5.30.1967).
• August 1967: Ill McKay threatened - Regional Representatives.
• New Correlation Board Room, where only he and the committee members
were permitted (war room). Changes charted on a giant board
(committee member Ruth Funk).
• Nov. 1968: The Committee proposed routing through Correlation all
religious materials used in Institute and Seminary, as well as LDS owned
• May 1970: Lee, according to summarized meeting minutes, “noted the
need of bringing in other programs, such as church education,
publications, communications, public relations” under the single eye of
• Regional Representatives, discussed “correlation of magazines; possible
climate now to consider combination of magazines” (Cannon 1971:22).
• 1972: Two consulting firms were hired to look at administrative procedures.
They both recommended further reforms.
• The first result was the creation of a Department of External
Communication, the public relations arm of the Church.
• The Division of Internal Communications – produced and reviewed all
instructional material and all communications from Church headquarters
to members (magazines). To relieve Church leaders, professional
managers were placed in charge of most administrative functions
• Lee also played a major role in the creation of a new Church Historical
• In 1983 Boyd K. Packer said, "There was a certainty at the beginning of the
Correlation, that we were moving into some major social changes and that
the institution of the family would be under attack, and that the vulnerability
of our people related to weakness in the family institution.” Correlation was
all about the family and priesthood at the head.
• Lee's presidency proved one of the briefest in the history of the church, lasting
from Smith's death in July 1972 to Lee's sudden fatal pulmonary hemorrhage
in December 1973.
Lee’s four reasons for
1. “Each organization was
to have its specific
2. “Each sub-division is of
equal importance in the
work of salvation”
3. “That all may be edified
or educated together”
4. “That the system may
be kept perfect”
• Doing to the church what
Umbridge did to Hogwarts
• Focus on inactive fathers: Men of the
priesthood were not to dominate, but neither
were they to abdicate authority.
• A “Priesthood Missionary Committee” was to fellowship
converts and proselyte on a limited scale in local
• The “Priesthood Welfare Committee” was to oversee
welfare expenditures and investigate and recommend
families in need of assistance (food, clothing, cash,
• “Priesthood Home Teaching Committee” was to oversee
home teaching of ward families by priesthood holders.
• The “Priesthood Genealogical Committee” was to assist in
gathering names of ancestors for vicarious ordinance work
Correlation will get us to Zion
• Apostle Thomas S. Monson: “The battle plan whereby we fight to save the souls of men
is not our own. It was provided by our leader, even President David O. McKay, by the
inspiration and revelation of the Lord. YES I SPEAK OF THAT PLAN WHICH WILL BRING
US VICTORY; EVEN THE CORRELATION PROGRAM OF THE CHURCH.”
• “The correlation program is NOT a man-made innovation or program wrought for the
convenience of human administration.” the manual declared, “It is a divinely revealed plan
designed to augment the building of Zion and prepare a people for the coming of Jesus
Christ. The following testimonies are supportive of that fact.”
• Church manuals on correlation contained a timeline extending back six thousand years. In
each thousand year “dispensation,” the Lord’s people tried to build Zion. “As with former
dispensations,” the manual warned, “few have grasped the eternal scope and significance
of this program.”
• Paul Royal, an executive secretary of the Correlation Committee, addressed Brigham
Young University students. He would later train many of the Regional Representatives on
the intricacies of Correlation. “But do you know why the City of Enoch was
translated…It was because they had the correlation program of the Priesthood...THE
CORRELATION PROGRAM WILL DO THE SAME FOR YOU...THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT
THE CORRELATION PROGRAM IS DESIGNED TO DO.”
Worries (“Super Priesthood Committee or Board”)
• “I said that the Correlation work affects primarily the duplication of
courses of study; and that it should not affect the organization of the
Church” (McKay diary, 9.18.1962; also in Prince and Wright 2005:151).
• “This will enable the entire Priesthood to get the Correlation of the
courses of study; that there will be no change in church Government,
and that now is a good time to get that clearly defined” (McKay
• President Brown said that the Prophet [Joseph Smith] had a wonderful
sense of propriety and of revelation when he said D&C 121:39.
• Regarding Correlation, McKay warned, “It is easy to understand how
the Apostasy took place in the early days [of Christianity]. President
Brown added, ‘Take the heads away, and you are done. President
Moyle said, ‘Leave this alone, and you get something contrary to the
Church. That is the way the Roman branch of the Church took
precedence” (McKay 9.19.1962).
• David O. McKay becomes correlated: “We found in our study, that in
1912 and again in 1920 since President McKay became one of the
General Authorities, he was a member of a committee of the Twelve
by whom similar studies were undertaken. This means that for a
matter of forty years at least, this subject of correlation had been
close to the President's mind and in his thoughts as something very
essential and desirable.”
• “[H]e considered the program rather revolutionary and wondered if it
should not have been given more consideration….[T]hat it is
something of a new system” (McKay 6.1.67) suggested dividing
auxiliaries among the First Presidency as a method to combat it.
• Lee's presidency lasted from Smith's death in July 1972 to Dec 1973 (fatal
• For a husband and wife to be “one flesh [is] to be ‘perfectly correlated.’”
• “Some folks have the mistaken notion that if somehow, by hook or crook,
they can get into the House of the Lord and be married they are assured
of exaltation regardless of what they do, and they’ll quote the 132
Section, the 26th verse. But that isn’t what the Lord means. The Lord does
assure an exaltation to those who make mistakes, if they repent” (Cram
for Life’s Final Examination, Brigham Young University Speeches of the
Year [Provo, 5 Jan. 1954], p. 7).
• Quote of actually getting a wife by hook or by crook, in the temple with
prophet's blessing (Crowley, Ivins, Tanner affair).
• Penultimate Source:
http://bycommonconsent.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/daymon-smithdissertation.pdf Chapter 12.
John W. Taylor: The Faithful Scandal
(hooks and crooks)
• September 27, 1886 revelation from the Lord.
• “Thus saith the Lord… how can I revoke an everlasting covenant…
And furthermore it is more pleasing to me that men should use their
free agency in regard to these matters… all those who would enter
into my glory must and shall obey my law… they must do the works
of Abraham. I have not revoked this law nor will I for it is everlasting
and those who will enter into my glory must obey the conditions
thereof, even so Amen."
• The paper upon which this revelation was written was found among
John Taylor’s personal effects by his son, John W. Taylor.
• At his trial in 1911, John W. Taylor said Brother Joseph Robinson,
Brother Cowley, Brother Badger, and Brother Joseph F. Smith, Jr. all
had copies (Collier and Knutson, Trials of John W. Taylor and Matthias
F. Cowley). See also Abraham H. Cannon Journal, 29 March 1892.
• J. Reuben Clark on John Taylor's 1886 revelation on polygamy:
“[T]he archives of the Church contain no such revelation; nor any
evidence justifying a belief that any such revelation was ever
given. From the personal knowledge of some of us, from the
uniform and common recollection of the presiding quorums of the
Church, from the absence in the Church Archives of any evidence
whatsoever justifying any belief that such a revelation was given,
we are justified in affirming that no such revelation exists."
• Clark's statement proves to be incorrect on virtually every point.
Though church leaders did not have the original revelation, they
owned the copy which John W. Taylor had given Wilford Woodruff
in 1887. Furthermore, Heber J. Grant was in attendance at the 22
February 1911 Quorum of the Twelve meeting when the 1886
revelation was discussed and entered into the minutes.
• John W. Taylor was excommunicated.
• Apologist response tries to mince words on “law” vs.
“principle” and “works of Abraham.”
• JoD 24:229; President Taylor: “[The law of celestial marriage]
is one of the greatest blessings that ever was conferred upon
the human family. It is an eternal law which has always
existed in other worlds as well as in this world.”
• Orson Pratt originally used the terms “principle” and
“doctrine” to describe the practice of plural marriage when
he publicly announced it on 29 August, 1852 (see also JoD
• Joseph F. Smith taught in 1878: “no wicked unjust or impure
person can enter into the law of celestial or plural marriage
without incurring the displeasure of the Almighty” (JoD
• “No burnt offerings”; ergo no polygamy required argument.
• His bodyguard, Woolley, would start the FLDS offshoot.
• At the age of 8, Woolley received a patriarchal blessing from Joseph
Smith, Sr., who at the time was the Presiding Patriarch of the
Church of the Latter Day Saints. Within this blessing, Woolley was
promised he would “be called to responsible stations,” that it would
involve having to “receive keys,” as well as “glory and honor” and
“worlds of knowledge and power,” and that he would one day “be
called the Lord's anointed.”
• Patriarch Smith also blessed superpowers on many.
• It was in John Woolley's home that Jesus Christ and Joseph Smith, Jr.
visited Taylor on the night of September 26, 1886 and where the
following day Taylor allegedly set apart five men (including John,
Lorin, and George Q. Cannon) as apostles, with a special
commission to keep alive celestial plural marriage by granting them
the authority to set apart others in perpetuity.
• 1904: Second Manifesto. Woolley was excommunicated March 30,
J. Golden Kimball
and a man with a dream
• Blessed with dreams while looking
for a wandering milk cow.
• Moroni instructed him where to
drill for a nephite gold mine. 3
• Enter rock without resistanceKitty Pride.
• 1000 feet down lay a body of rich
white quartz, then there was leaf
• 9 big rooms. 3 ft. capstone, very
hard. Drills going in and out.
Electrical equipment after the
• filled up with water about half
Justification in the Humbug mine
• Jesse Knight had dream of a mine and told a
friend who said, "Humbug!"
• 1890s: Mine companies found rich ore, but most
the mines filled with water.
• Jesse Knight came in 1896 with little money and
no previous mining knowledge or experience.
• Deposits formed about 31.5 million years ago just
so Jesse Knight could get rich... and the atheist is
the proud one.
and Silver City wiki.
• Prayer circles every morning. Ogden Kraut worked with
Bishop Koyle in the mine.
• "I heard this story repeated by Brother Koyle in 1911, 1912,
1913, 1914, and 1915, and many times since. One peculiar
thing about Brother Koyle, he never crosses himself,
repeating his dream with the same exactness.”
• The messenger told him the purpose of the mine would be to bring
relief to the Lord's faithful people at a time when great tribulation
and distress would be in the land.
• He told him of a period of four years of famine and explained that the
first two years the Saints would be able to get by, but the third and
fourth years they would have nothing to eat unless it was prepared
and stored up against that time.
• Winters of heavy snow and big drifts, and then a mild winter.
Following the mild winter would be a hot dry summer. The crops
would come up in the spring, and there would be considerable
moisture, and the crops would be glorious. Wheat crumbles shortage
of food the first year of harvest.
• The purpose of the mine was to build store bins and store up
wheat and other foods like Joseph of old who was sold into Egypt.
• He probably gave one of these reports each month or so at the
Thursday night meetings.
• Famine would occur all over the world--not only because of crop
failures, but because of the troubles and chaos caused by the
shutdown of manufacturing and transportation.
• "By the time we get our ore, the mining districts will be almost at
• Automobiles will get larger and larger, until some of them will
resemble street cars, filled with people (UTA prophesy).
• “I saw the farms all through the country all being mortgaged.”
• The people were coming to borrow money at a low rate of interest
from the Koyle Mining Company.
• “I also saw a large bank belonging to our company standing on a
certain corner in Spanish Fork” (I have since been shown the
• “Then I saw the hard times beginning to tell upon the treasury of
the Church, being more depleted than in many years.”
• “Then, right in the very midst of all these happenings, with things at
their darkest, we began shipping ore, giving a decided relief to the
• ("Grant/Talmage Statement", Sept. 9, 1931, p. 10)
J. Golden Kimball was a friend to Bishop Koyle and a strong
supporter of the mine.
• John Koyle arrived in eastern Tennessee, which was a part of
the mission being presided by President J. Golden Kimball.
• Dreamt of a mob coming after other missionaries. In the dream,
he heard them shout, “Get up a mob is coming,” and woke up
to them shouting, “A mob is coming!” Warned to stay in house
for no harm to come.
• Dreamt that a mob came to a missionary conference looking for
J. Golden. He warned J. Golden, mob came.
• President Ivins said that the Bishop had a great obligation from
the Lord, and he must follow through on that mining mission.
• God warns Koyle that Joseph F. Smith has 8 pages in a talk
against the mine in conference. He has J. Golden talk Joseph
F. Out of giving said talk.
• "I'm not going to put my head in the lion's mouth.“
• “God hates a coward.”
• J. Golden Kimball was censured for support of the mine. Heber J. Grant
pounds on desk and says, “There's no more gold in that mountain than
there is on this desk.” Golden replies, “More than the mine in Oregon.”
• The Nephite messengers.
• Give Pres. Kimball 500 shares of stock.
• LDS church has stock donated to them.
Mark E. Peterson made him sign a document so they
wouldn't excommunicate him and 30 other members,
and he'd have an audience to the president of the
• Messengers told him to never sign anything about the
• The next day, the whole story was on the front page of
• Signing it was worst thing he'd ever done, end of his gift. A
year later he was dead.
• Stewardship: If the lord chooses a man to go and drill a
whole in a mountain, not under stewardship of the
• No journal, just oral tradition stories.
• BYU Thesis
• Sunstone and here
• When a Bishop prophesies better than the prophet
(no temple in Mexico)
George Q. Cannon and a Quarter
• Source is a descendant of
George Q., with access to
all diaries and histories.
• George Q. Cannon was far
more powerful than John
Taylor. Newspapers talked
about it, that’s why his
reward is higher.
• George is wanted for bigamy.
• Wife refuses to testify if she is pregnant with
his son. Her teenager hits the U.S. Attorney.
• George is sent to Mexico.
• Caught en route and taken back. Train hold up
planned, bribe attempts.
• George plans on escaping, falls off train,
• Bail set for $10,000 ($251k in today’s money).
• Multiple counts for $45,000 or $1.1 million.
• Pres. Cannon in Jail
• Jumped bond, newspapers had heyday.
George’s father probably made
• George Cannon built the drag, kind of like a large sled, that
their bodies were brought back to Nauvoo on. He also made
their death masks, clipping off a lock of Joseph’s hair that was
caught in the plaster, and giving it to his son, David.
• Faithful articles on George Q. Cannon:
• Restated in liahona in 80s
• 2003 Church History manual
Bowie Knives in the Temple
• Warren Parrish called to be secretary to Joseph Smith (KSS ledger).
• Joseph bets the whole of the KSS success on land consecrated to
• KSS fails, Joseph skips town.
• Warren Parrish says that they need to sell the temple to pay the
• Saints claim Warren and others show up with bowie knives and pistols in the
temple to take it back. Eliza R. Snow is the only source. Joseph Fielding Smith
in his Church History and Modern Revelation, Volume 3, page 107 ultimately
sourced from Eliza R. Snow's recollection.
Bowie Knives in the Temple
• Would individuals left on the spot for millions of dollars who came
to collect the collateral and get out of debt on behalf of a CEO
perhaps cause some contention?
• Parley P. Pratt says Warren confessed to embezzling $20,000. KSS
only had $21,000 in total.
• Ledger book found.
• Mark E. Peterson's audio lectures on Joseph Smith state clearly
this means that Joseph Smith is an honest man. If the money is
all accounted for, what does that mean about Warren Parrish
who kept the ledger book?
Razor Blades, Throats and Temple
• Sidney Rigdon threatens to slit Joseph and Emma’s throats
after being tarred and feathered (Mormon Enigma).
• Mountain Meadow Massacres were all throats cut ear to ear,
• Blood Atonement.
• Penalties in the temple removed in 1990 involved Masonic
• When you find a spirit that wants bloodshed--murder--the
same is not of God but is of the devil.– Joseph Smith Jr. King
King Follett Discourse
(Rings and Things)
• The King Follett discourse: April 7, 1844, less than three months
before his assassination. The discourse was presented to more than
twenty thousand LDS at a General Conference held after the
funeral of King Follett, who died on March 9, 1844 (crushed while
digging a well).
• Despite not being an official revelation (no idea why), it is better
sourced than many official ones.
• Thomas Bullock - using a type of personal shorthand.
• William Clayton - writing in longhand.
• Willard Richards - taking "minute"-style notes of major
elements of the speech.
• Wilford Woodruff - also took extensive contemporaneous notes
and transferred the notes to his journal with editorializations,
but his original notes were not preserved.
• A version was reconstructed (by Bullock) from the Bullock and
Clayton records, and was published in the church paper, Times and
Seasons, of August 15, 1844.
• A later version resulted from amalgamation of the Richards,
Woodruff, Bullock and Clayton texts. This amalgamation was done
by church employee, Jonathan Grimshaw, roughly ten years after
Smith's death and is generally regarded as the "official" LDS Church
version because it was carefully reviewed, edited, and approved by
LDS authorities, including Brigham Young.
• The famous "couplet," stated by Lorenzo Snow, was a
summarization of "King Follett.“
• Hinckley called it, “only a couplet.” “As man now is, God once
was: As God now is, man may be.” -Lorenzo Snow (1840)
• "It is the first principle of the Gospel to know for a certainty the
Character of God, and to know that we may converse with him
as one man converses with another… God himself was once as
we are now, and is an exalted man, and sits enthroned in
yonder heavens! That is the great secret.”
• God made the world from preexisting "chaotic matter.“
• Earth was made from other Earths, that’s why there are
• "I take my ring from my finger and liken it unto the mind of
man... because it has no beginning.”
• Edited version, probably from the History of the Church,
• "The pure principles of element, are principles that can
never be destroyed.“
• I don’t know what a pure principle of an element is, but I bet
that particle accelerators would put a damper on his meaning.
• Smith discussed the potential of mankind by referencing Romans
8:17, then stating that men may go: "...from one small degree to
another, and from a small capacity to a great one; from grace to
grace, from exaltation to exaltation ... until (they) arrive at the
station of a God.“
• Ever hear you can progress from Telestial glory to the Celestial?
• Joseph's opinion of not understanding God's Character: If we start
right, it is easy to go right all the time; but if we start wrong we may go
wrong, and it will be a hard matter to get right.
• Hint, hint: do not speak against Joseph: “If I should be the man to
comprehend him and to explain or convey his principles to your hearts so
that the spirit seals it upon you, let every man and woman henceforth
put his hand on his mouth and never say anything against the man of
• The apostle [John] says, "This is life eternal"--to know God and
Jesus Christ, whom he has sent. If any man, not knowing what kind of
a being God is, inquires to know if the declaration of the apostle is true-and searches diligently his own heart--he will admit that he has not
eternal life; for there can be no eternal life on any other principle.
• Joseph Smith, Jr. condemns Hinckley: "But if I fail, it becomes my duty
to renounce all my pretensions to revelations and inspirations. And if all
[religious teachers] pretend to know God, they will be as bad off as I am,
at any rate.”
• Patriarchal blessing common line: “How consoling to the mourner…
not to sorrow, suffer or die any ore but shall be God’s heirs and joint heirs
with Jesus Christ.”
• BABES ON THRONES
• [William Clayton Journal]: “I asked the President w[h]ether
children who die in infancy will grow. He answered ‘no, we shall
receive them precisely in the same state as they died i.e. no
larger. They will have as much intelligence as we shall but shall
always remain separate and single. They will have no increase.
Children who are born dead will have full grown bodies being
made up by the resurrection’” (George D. Smith, An Intimate Chronicle;
The Journals of William Clayton, Signature Books in association with Smith
Research Associates, Salt Lake City, 1995).
• "Eternity is full of thrones, upon which dwell thousands of
children, reigning on thrones of glory, with not one cubit
added to their stature.“ (removed from Ensign but available
from BYU) http://infantsonthrones.com/
• I shall comment on the very first Hebrew word in the Bible,
Berosheit. I want to analyze the word; baith--in, by, through, and
everything else. Rosh--the head. Sheit--grammatical termination.
• FAIR's commentary on what Jews believe, which can be
summed up with, "Someone, somewhere in all the people who
read the Bible, agreed with Joseph; ergo, Joseph is right."
• There is no balance of evidence. No “majority," nor is there a
discussion of counterpoints from other scholars. Anyone agrees
with Joseph... then Joseph was right.
• I would let you know that I am not a fallen prophet.
• Nauvoo Expositor
• Jane and William Law, others in audience
• No outer darkness for anyone who dies without killing the
• “I know the scriptures; I understand them. I said that no man
can commit the unpardonable sin after the dissolution of the
body, but he must do it in this world. Hence the salvation of
Jesus Christ was wrought out for all men in order to triumph
over the devil; for if it did not catch him in one place, it would in
another, for he stood up as a Savior.”
• “After a man has sinned against the Holy Ghost there is no
repentance for him. He has got to say that the sun does not
shine while he sees it.”
• Apostasy = Murderers: “He has got to deny Jesus Christ when the
heavens have been open to him. And from that time he begins to
be an enemy to this work, like many of the apostates of The Church
of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. When a man begins to be an
enemy, he hunts me; he seeks to kill me; he thirsts for my blood;
he never ceases. He has the same spirit of them who crucified the
Lord of Life-the same spirit that sins against the Holy Ghost. You
cannot bring him to repentance. Awful is the consequence.”
Thoughts as to why this is not official
• Joseph F. Smith was uncomfortable with the discourse.
• B.H. Roberts saved King Follett discourse.
• Ensign Article: “This was not a stenographic report, but a carefully
and skillfully prepared one made by these men who were trained in
reporting and taking notes. Evidently, there are some imperfections
in the report and some thoughts expressed by the Prophet which
were not fully rounded out and made complete.
• All four sources:
David Whitmer, second prophet of
the restoration, was right
• July 1834: Joseph Smith, Jr. gave a history of
the ordination of David Whitmer to be a
leader, or a prophet to this Church, which ordination- was on conditions that he (Joseph
Smith, Jr.) did not live to God himself.
• March 15, 1838: President Joseph Smith, Jr.
approved of the proceedings of the High
Council after hearing the minutes of the
• Why would David fall?
• David Whitmer, John Whitmer, and W. W.
Phelps were removed from Stake Presidency,
“accused of having used $1400 of Church funds to
buy Missouri lands and then selling them to the
Saints for a profit.”
• David Whitmer has also been charged with
breaking the Word of Wisdom.
•Source (Feb 5, 1838: Conkling, Christopher J., Joseph
• Why would Joseph fall?
• May 29 1837: Orson Pratt and Lyman Johnson accuse
Joseph of lying, financial fraud, and extortion (with
consecrated lands in Kirtland used to profit).
• Did Joseph break the Word of Wisdom?
• “Nevertheless, contemporary records indicate
that Joseph Smith, Jr. was not, himself, a strict
observer. Smith is recorded at various times as drinking
tea, beer, and wine.”
• Polygamy of under aged girls against their will.
• Mixing with the masonic (secret oaths and combinations).
• Blood atonement, boasting, etc.
• An address to all believers in Christ
• Polygamy a stumbling block
• Never denied testimony (from which the LDS
Church made a video)
• “I do not indorse the change of the name of the
• As to the High Priesthood, Jesus Christ himself is
the last Great High Priest
• Translation by head-in-hat method
• Revelations altered (Dousing rods)
• Spaulding-Rigdon theory mentioned
• Origin for Church of Christ templelot (more or
Joseph Smith III
and Hinckley’s dirty little secret
• Gordon’s Talk from the pulpit.
• Uses anti RLDS literature.
• Edits the quote/takes out of context.
• “Father’s blessing” in jail and Brigham, Jr.
• They form a quorum equal in authority and
power to the presidency (with or without a
First Presidency debate).
• Ranked by age, seniority, second endowment.
• Apostle source that the apostles have power.
• What was going on?
• Mark Hofmann had just sold him Joseph Smith III’s
• 3 years later Oaks would testify that a salamander
was a symbol of an angel for the same reason - CYA
("1985 CES Doctrine and Covenants Symposium,"
• 1980 Hofmann sold the blessing, 1981, talk given.
• “The forger later conceded he created material that
could be embarrassing to the LDS Church in hope
that Mormon leaders would spend large sums of
money to keep them private.”
• “Church leaders could have foreseen” argument
Rocky Mountains over a barrel
• Biography of Anson Call in August 1842.
• Prophet goes to get a drink, while Hyrum and
J.C. Bennett go to a meeting for the organization
of a masonic lodge, from a barrel.
• “This water tastes much like that of the crystal
streams that are running from the snow-capped
• Tullidge's Histories, Vol I. History of Northern Utah, and Southern
Idaho.--Biographical Supplement, p. 271
• Autobiography of Benjamin F. Johnson, from My Life's Review
(Independence, MO: Zion's Printing and Publishing Co., 1947).
• Autobiography of Wandle Mace, 188–189.
• Brigham Young, Journal of Discourses 11:16.
• B.H. Roberts, The Life of John Taylor, 179–180.
• Autobiography of Mosiah Lyman Hancock, p. 28.
• Rachel Ridgeway Grant, Young Woman's Journal 16 (1905):
• Larson, Diaries of Rudger Clawson, 612–613.
White horses and Civil Wars
• White horse
• January 6, 2010: The LDS Church issued the
following statement on its Newsroom blogsite:
"The so-called 'White Horse Prophecy’ is based on
accounts that have not been substantiated by
historical research and is not embraced as Church
• Saints kicked out of Missouri, Joseph goes to
Washington. On way back, he is said to have made
the following prediction:
“ ‘if Congress will not hear our petition and
grant us protection, they will be broken up as
a government, and God shall damn them, and
there shall be nothing left of them—not even
a grease spot.’”
• Edwin Rushton and Theodore Turley, May 6, 1843
“Hanging by a thread”:
• Revolution, England intervenes to stop bloodshed.
• In America, no supreme government.
• No peace except in the Rockies.
White horse quoted:
• 1855: Brigham Young quotes in Journal of Discourses 2:182.
• 1868: Brigham Young, JOD 12:204.
• John Widtsoe quoted B.Y. in Discourses of Brigham Young (p
• 1912 Joseph F. Smith quoted it in Conference Report, October
• 1942: J. Reuben Clark quoted it in Conference Report, October
• 1961: Ezra T. Benson (apostle), Conference Report, October
• 1963: Ezra again quotes it.
• 1980: Ezra Benson (14 fundamentals of following the prophet).
• 2000: Senator Orrin Hatch, “Did Hatch Allude To LDS
Prophecy?” Salt Lake Tribune, Nov. 11, 1999.
Even though the Newsroom (Correlation) says
it is false, the doctrine taught continues boldly,
nobly, and independent until it has penetrated
every stake, sounded in every member’s ear,
and swept every nation.
Must be true doctrine… or a very sticky meme.
Civil War Prophecy
• Joseph Smith made an 1832 prophecy of the
Civil War (Gil Scharffs).
• Jackson: STATES-RIGHTS challenge. He asked
Congress to permit him to use federal troops.
• Slavery added in 1842 (Joseph’s views had
altered) (Glory is an inspired film).
• Painesville Telegraph, “The Crisis,” December 21,
1832 (four days before).
• There was already North and South contention.
• South calls on Great Britain. South went to France, too. War
of 1812 was only 20 years past at this point. British burned
the capital to the ground, and the idea that the North and
Great Britain would be at odds was not a stretch.
• British sat out the war. Deal to have ships made with British.
Britain sold a lot to both sides.
• God has a hard time with pronouns (John Larsen).
• “They” call upon other nations (Southern States, Great
• December 8th, 1832 newspaper in the area: "A general war in
Europe becomes daily more and more probable."
• Civil war caused World War I. Ignores Crimean, Napoleanoic
Wars, treaties, etc. “6 degrees of Kevin Bacon kind of
• Single sentence has multiple prophesies.
• Failed prophesy that FAIR forgot to mention.
• "In this country the North and the South will exert themselves
against each other, and ere long the whole face of the United
States will be in commotion, fighting one against another, and
they will destroy their nationality" (Journal of Discourses
9:55) Heber C. Kimball.
• On July 28, 1861, Brigham Young said the Civil War would not
end until the work is accomplished and the "land is emptied"
(Journal of Discourses 9:142,143).
Bonus: Playing Cards
• May 29, 1847: Brigham Young upbraids members of the
Pioneer Party en route to Utah, "I have let the brethren
dance, and fiddle, and act the nigger night after night to see
what they will do, … they will stoop to dance as niggers. I
don't mean this as debasing the negroes, by any means; . . ."
• Wilford Woodruff adds that he advises, "all the Brethren
who have got Cards to burn them up. Also Checkers &
dominoes. For if you keep your Covenants you have made
you will have no time to use them & they will be useless
lumber on your hands. If you keep them for your children
they will only prove a curse to them."
• D. Michael, Quinn, Mormon Hierarchy: Extensions of Power
Final installment – Nutty Mormon
• Those Patriotic Mormons
• The big “Who’s Who” of Mormonism
• (polygamy cross reference)
• The great big list of church ownership
• Punking the Library the “Lord’s Way”
• The sealed Portion of the Book of Mormon
• The end of the Latter Day Saints
• Mormons, horns, and hats
• God kills kittens
Checking Olympus ™