WORK – LIFE BALANCE… A Conversation

Miriam Lacher, MA, MRC, LMHC

THINKING GLOBALLY AND THE EFFECTS LOCALLY: • A long war and threats of terrorism • A widening chasm between the haves and have-nots including health care • Debates about the environment with some forecasts of catastrophic consequences • Fuel costs escalate, cost of living mirrors • A time of unmatched technological advances with questionable attention to humanistic parallels • Is there an absence of balance in our world?

The emotional and cognitive results might be… 2

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs Pyramid

Self Actualization Ego (Esteem) Social (Belonging) Safety/Security Physiological

Challenging projects, opportunities for innovation and creativity, learning and creating at a high level Important projects, recognition from others, prestige and status Acceptance, be part of a group, identification with a successful team Physical safety, economic security, freedom from threats Physical survival needs: water, food, sleep, warmth, exercise, etc.

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Six Dimensions of Self Toward A Work-Life Balance

Physical – Behaviors or actions conducive to optimal physical health Emotional – The ability to recognize and share feelings; to be self-accepting; to have an okayness with self, inner peace and calm and serenity Intellectual – The ability to think critically, an openness to new ideas, willing to entertain a paradigm shift, nurturing creativity, motivation and curiosity 4

Six Dimensions of Self Toward A Work-Life Balance

(cont’d) Spiritual – A set of guiding principles, values, ethics and morals which give meaning and purpose to life (my connection to the universe) Social – Relationships, communication with others, the capacity for intimacy, a support network, reaching out to others Environmental – Creating a safe secure environment free of threat or harm 5

Harmony is the inner cadence of contentment we feel when the melody of life is in tune. When somehow we’re able to strike the right chord—to balance the expectations of our families and our responsibilities in the world on the one hand with our inner needs for spiritual growth and personal expression on the other…Usually, when the distractions of daily life deplete our energy, the first thing we eliminate is the thing we need the most: quiet, reflective time. Time to dream, time to think, time to contemplate what’s working and what’s not, so that we can make changes for the better…Learn how to pause.

Sarah Ban Breathnach -“Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy” 6

The Journey to the Balance

• What roles do I play in my life?

• What do I expect of myself in each of these roles?

• What principles guide me in my aspirations?

• What is my passion in life?

• What are my strengths?

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If we know who we really are, what we want in life, and how we want to lead our lives, we have a very good chance of accomplishing our aspirations. The articulation of who we are, what we want in life, and how we want to lead our lives can be called our Personal Mission Statement.

And yours?

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Looking More Deeply at a Work-Life Balance: Work-Life Balance is about taking control of the conditions in one’s workplace as well as in one’s personal life. This is accomplished when an individual feels dually satisfied about her/his personal life as well as her/his paid occupation. There are mutual benefits to the individual, the business (the Hospital) and the society when the individual’s personal and professional life is balanced.

And they are…, the benefits… 9

POSSIBILITIES: • PRIORITIZATION: List what you value the most; - Are you mindful of the Six Dimensions? - What really matters to you? - What you want, not what you think they should be.

• CHOICES: Always with consequences • BOUNDARIES: Where do you begin and I end?

• OVERCOME ENABLING: Fostering actions/behaviors which perpetuate negative results 10

POSSIBILITIES: • FLEXIBILITY: Of self, of work • COMMUNICATION: Direct without rancor • EXPECTATIONS: How can I expect of you, when I don’t attend to me; modeling • WORK/LIFE BALANCE INITIATIVES: The policies, a business culture/mind-set which contribute to a better balance between the demands of the job and health management of life outside work 11

POSSIBILITIES : • PROTECT YOUR PRIVATE TIME • Attend to your life as the “whole”/the Gestalt. If we lose sight of the entire of ourselves, we are weakened by our narrowed vision 12