Drama Drama Drama Karpman Drama Triangle A way of understanding Winners Triangle A new way of communicating Kim Gregory

Rescuer •Feel they know ‘best’ •Do more than their fair share •Has difficulty saying “no” •Rescues even when not invited •Are often lonely, attends to others needs and ignores their own •Becomes their identity often rewarded Stephen Karpman Drama Triangle Victim •Will feel helpless, victimized, oppressed, hopeless, powerless, ashamed, put down, worthless, inadequate •“I can’t do it” •Poor me Persecutor •Criticize, put downs, sarcastic, bully, angry •Have a rigid authoritative stance •Blame other people •Ridicule, fault finding •Are often burnt out, tired, overwhelmed

Resourceful

Caring

•Does not take over unless asked or wants to •Do their share only •Does not do the thinking for the person •Feels genuine concern, not fear or seeking to meet their own needs

Skills needed

Self awareness and listening skills Acey Choy Winners Triangle Vulnerable •Use feelings as information or data about self •Acts from adult ego state •Problem solver

Skills needed

•Problem solver •Self awareness Powerful

Assertive

•Asks for what they want, no mind reading required •No sulking or punishing behavior •Says “no” •Makes changes to get their needs met

Skills needed

•Self awareness •Ability to express needs without over powering person

Parental role

• Culture • Responsibility • First educators • Facilitators/Gatekeepers of social experiences

Professional Role

• Enabler • See unrecognized capabilities/strengths • See a “snapshot” of the story only • Unique contributors • Bring a fresh perspective

Working together to bring change

• Together – bridge the gap • Recognize BOTH parties play a huge role in clients lives • Both bring unique contribution • Communicate Communicate Communicate….keep each other “in the loop”.

• Be mindful, not reactive

References

• • http://dynamicleadership.co.nz/pdfs/Karpman%Triangle.

pdf http://www.beingasunbeam.com

Kim Gregory