Transcript Thesis Statements

Thesis/Body Paragraph
Development
While many students fail to see the necessity of
a strong thesis statement and topic
sentences, they are a requirement of a wellwritten paper.
Thesis Statement Requirements
A Thesis Statement Should Be:
1. Your opinion on the topic of the paper;
2. Worded directly, though not simplistically;
3. Placed at the end of your introduction.
A Thesis Statement Should Not Be
1. Strictly informational;
2. Indirect or “cute”;
3. Grammatically incorrect.
Avoid writing a thesis that is too
broad and general
 There are many reasons the film is
superior to the book.
 Vague--name the film/book
 Broad—focus on a more specific area of
superiority that can be supported
 Improved: While the novel of
Shoeless Joe is a classic work of
American literature, the film version
more effectively shows the magic of
Ray’s field and life.
Avoid writing a thesis that is too
narrow and specific
 The book is better than the film because
it includes Eddie Scissons.
 Narrow—All three of your body paragraphs
would have to be about Eddie Scissons
 Improved: While the film version of
Shoeless Joe contains most of the major
elements of the novel, the novel is
superior because it provides deeper
psychological insight into the theme of
dreams versus reality.
Transitioning to your Thesis
 Transitions provide a smooth flow
from the background information in
your introduction to your thesis.
 You can make the transition the
opening part of your thesis statement
or a separate sentence completely,
but it must link the information in
your introduction to the point you are
making about the topic.
Thesis Transition Examples
 For a summary introduction:
 While the film version of Shoeless Joe
contains most of the major elements of the
novel, the novel is superior to the film because it
provides deeper psychological insight the into
theme of dreams versus reality.
 For a biography introduction:
 Both the film and the novel reflect Kinsella’s
interest in baseball and the supernatural, but
the novel is superior to the film because it
provides deeper psychological insight into the
theme of dreams versus reality.
Thesis Transition Examples
 For a background introduction:
 Films and novels have their individual
aesthetic assets; however, in this case,
the novel is superior to the film because it
provides deeper psychological insight into
the theme of dreams versus reality.
 For an “opposite” introduction:
 Despite the preference many fans
profess for the film, the novel is superior
to the film because it provides deeper
psychological insight into the theme of
dreams versus reality.
Body Paragraph Structure:
Topic Sentences
Each body paragraph should start with a
topic sentence that states a specific
point supporting the thesis:
Thesis: Despite the preference many fans profess
for the film, the novel is superior to the film
because it provides deeper psychological insight
into the theme of dreams versus reality.
Topic Sentence: By leaving out the character of
Eddie Scissons, the film eliminates a major
component of the dream theme that is central
in the novel.
Body Paragraph Structure:
Specific Details
In order to support the point made by the
topic sentence, the body paragraph
must included specific details:
Topic Sentence: By eliminating the magical
appearance of an actual stadium on Ray’s farm,
the film lessens the dream-like quality of Ray’s
vision.
Details: quote from the book about the stadium,
description of the scene in the film, explanation
of how this affects the dream/reality theme
Full Body Paragraph
By eliminating the magical appearance of an actual
stadium on Ray’s farm, the film lessens the dream-like quality of
Ray’s vision. In the book, Ray tells us the stadium “looms dark
against the sky, the park is surrounded by decks of floodlights,
making it brighter than day, the crowd buzzes, the vendors hawk
their wares . . .” (14). However, in the film, there is only the one
set of bleachers Ray made himself, a few light poles, no crowd,
no vendors, no real aura of major league baseball. This change
makes the magic of Ray’s vision less viscerally amazing. By
downplaying the magical appearance of the stadium, the field
appears more physically real but less magical, removing the
cognitive dissonance the provides the conflict between dreams
and reality in the book. In the film’s more realistic setting,
even the players seem more real and less like apparitions.
Body Paragraph Order
 Before adding transitions and
finishing your essay, consider these
orders for body paragraphs:
 Chronological—the order of how events
occur in the book
 Logical—making points necessary for
the understanding of following points
first
 Order of Importance—going from lest
to most important
Body Paragraph Structure:
Transitions
 Occur in and between body paragraphs as well
as in the introduction
 Provide connection to the thesis and between
specific points
 Connections can be
 “Mechanical”—just name the next point
 “one point,” “another point”;
 By order—chronological or importance
 “First, second, third”; “even more important, most
important”
 By content—the best option (see below)
Full Essay Outline
Thesis: Despite the preference many fans profess for the film, the
novel is superior to the film because it provides deeper
psychological insight into the theme of dreams versus reality.
TS1: By eliminating the magical appearance of an actual
stadium on Ray’s farm, the film lessens the dream-like
quality of Ray’s vision.
Trans1: In the film’s more realistic setting, then, even the players
seem more real and less like apparitions.
TS2: Through emphasis of the ghost-players’ ethereal qualities,
Shoeless Joe, the novel, makes readers question the reality
of the players more effectively than the film does.
Trans2: In addition to the elimination of the faceless players and
crowds, the film also cuts Eddie Scissons.
TS3: By leaving out the character of Eddie Scissons, the film
eliminates a major component of the dream theme that is
central in the novel.