Transcript What is Emotional Abuse

What is Emotional Abuse
in the Workplace?
Debra C. Harris, Ph.D., M.S.T.
Assistant Professor
Human Kinetics and Health Education
University of WI Oshkosh
Oshkosh, WI
Former NBC Anchor, Tom Brokaw
said…….
• In a Graduation Speech at
Emory University on May 16, 2007
• “Here is a secret that no one has told you:
Real life is Junior High. The world that
you are about to enter is filled with junior
high, adolescent pettiness; pubescent
rivalries; the insecurities of 13 year olds;
and the false bravado of 14 year olds.”
Workplace Bullying
What is it exactly?
• Workplace bullying is the “intentional
infliction of a hostile work environment
upon an employee by a co-worker, coworkers, or superior.”
• Typically it is done through a combination
of verbal and nonverbal behaviors.
» Yamada, 2000, p 481
Mobbing
What is it exactly?
• The “mobbing” syndrome is a malicious
attempt to force a person out of the
workplace through unjustified accusations,
humiliation, general harassment,
emotional abuse, and/or terror.
– Davenport, Schwartz, Elliott, 2002, p. 40
Mobbing
What is it?
• It is a “ganging up” by the leader(s)organization, superior, co-worker, or
subordinate- who rallies others into systematic
and frequent “mob-like behaviors.”
– Davenport, Schwartz, Elliott, 2002, p. 40
• This might look like a Human Resource Director,
a Superintendent, an Assistant Superintendent,
and a Principal, along with “hand selected” coworkers that are a part of an “inner circle,”
inflicting the same type of treatment to an
abused individual.
Mobbing: What is it?
“Vultur-ing”
• “Because the organization ignores,
condones or even instigates the behavior,
it can said that the target, seemingly
helpless against the powerful and many, is
indeed “mobbed.” The result is always
injury-physical and/or mental distress
and/or illness and/or social death, and in
too many cases, expulsion from the
workplace.”
– Davenport, Schwartz, Elliott, 2002, p. 40
The Specifics
• Ten Key Factors of the Mobbing Syndrome
by
Noa Davenport, Ph.D., Ruth Schwartz, and Gail
Elliott
• From the Book……….
• Mobbing: Emotional Abuse in the American
Workplace, 2002.
The Mobbing Specifics
What does it really look like?
• 1. Assaults on the dignity, integrity,
credibility, and professional competence of
employees.
• 2. Negative, humiliating, intimidating,
abusive, malevolent and controlling
communication.
The Mobbing Specifics
What does it really look like?
• 3. Committed directly, or indirectly, in
subtle or obvious ways.
• 4. Perpetrated by one or more members-
–“Vulturing”
The Mobbing Specifics
What does it really look like?
• 5. Occurring in a continual, multiple, and
systematic fashion, over some time.
• There is a definite “Pattern” to the behavior.
Repeated behaviors over numerous dates.
Document, document, document.
• 6. Portraying the target as being at fault.
• 7. Committed with the intent to force the person
out.
The Mobbing Specifics
What does it really look like?
• 8. Mobbing is engineered to discredit,
confuse, intimidate, isolate, and force the
person into submission. A total “control”
issue!
• 9. Representing the removal from the
workplace as the target’s “choice.”
Settlement agreements, “early
retirements,” etc.
The Mobbing Specifics
What does it really look like?
• 10. Not recognized, misinterpreted,
ignored, tolerated, encouraged, or even
instigated by the management of the
organization.
• Total lack of acceptance or responsibility
or even total denial that the organization
does such behavior.
Sociopathic Behaviors
in the Workplace
• “About one in 25 people is a sociopath.
Meaning essentially that they do not have
a conscience.
• 1 in 25 ordinary citizens secretly has no
conscience and can do anything at all
without feeling guilty.
– Dr. Martha Stout, The Sociopath Next Door, 2005
Sociopathic Behaviors
in the Workplace
• “ The intellectual difference between right and
wrong does not bring on emotional sirens and
flashing red lights, or the fear of God, like it does
the rest of us” with sociopathic behavior.”
• “Without the slightest blip of guilt or remorse, 1
in 25 people can do anything at all.”
– Dr. Martha Stout, The Sociopath Next Door, 2005
Sociopathic Behaviors
in the Workplace
Covetous Sociopath
An inordinate desire for the
possessions of others.
Covetous Sociopath
“Since it is simply not possible to steal and have
for oneself the most valuable “possessions” of
another person-beauty, intelligence, success,
strong character-the Covetous Sociopath
settles for besmirching or damaging enviable
qualities in others so that they will not have
them either, or at least not be able to enjoy
them so much.”
– Theodore Millon, Personality Theorist
Covetous Sociopath
• “Here, the pleasure lies in taking
rather than in having.”
» Theodore Millon, Personality Theorist
Covetous Sociopath
• “The Covetous Sociopath thinks that life has cheated
them somehow; has not given them nearly the same
bounty as other people, and so they must even the
existential score by robbing people, by secretly causing
destruction in others lives.”
• The Covetous Sociopath believes they have been
slighted by nature, circumstances, and destiny, and that
diminishing other people is their only means of being
powerful.
» Martha Stout, The Sociopath Next Door, 2005
Covetous Sociopath
• “Retribution, usually against people who have
NO idea that they have been targeted, is the
most important activity in the Covetous
Sociopath’s life, their highest priority!”
• “They are the ultimate wolf in sheep’s clothing.”
– Martha Stout, The Sociopath Next Door, 2005
Sociopath Characteristics
from the PCL: SV (Psych Check List-Screening Version)
• 1. Glibness and Superficial Charm
• 2. Manipulative and Con Artists
Never recognize the rights of others
See their self-serving behavior as
permissible
Charming, but covertly hostile and
domineering
See their targets as merely instruments to be
used
Sociopathic Characteristics
3. Grandiose Sense of Self Worth
*Entitled to certain things as “their” right.
4. Pathological Lying
*No problem lying. Almost impossible for them to be
truthful on a consistent basis.
5.
Impulsive Nature/Poor Behavioral Controls
*No sense of personal boundaries. Believe that they are all
knowing, entitled to every wish, no concern for their impact on
others. Use small expressions of love that alternate between
rage and abuse.
Sociopathic Characteristics
• 6. Irresponsibility/Unreliability
– Not concerned about wrecking others’ lives
and dreams.
– Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they
cause
– Does not accept blame themselves, but
blames others, even for acts they obviously
committed.
Sociopathic Characteristics
• 7. Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
• Uses sexual behavior and allurement to gain
favors and climb the “corporate” ladder.
• May have been sexually abused as a child.
• 8. Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic
Lifestyle
• Tends to move locations, makes all encompassing
promises for the future, poor work ethic, but
exploits others effectively. Gets others to do their
work for them.
Sociopathic Characteristics
• 9. Criminal and/or Entrepreneurial
Versatility.
• High “stim” people. May run a “side” business as
well as their full time job, because their full time job
may be “boring” to them.
• 10. Shallow Emotions
• Show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and
compassion. Is usually feigned and serves an
ulterior motive.
Sociopathic Characteristics
• 11. Callousness/Lack of Empathy
*Unable to empathize with the pain of their
targets. Has only contempt for other’s
feelings of distress and readily takes
advantage of them.
*12. Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
*Instead of friends, they have accomplices
who end up as victims. The end always
justifies the means, and they let nothing
stand in their way.
Women in the Workplace
Relational Aggression
• Relational aggression is psychological
(social/emotional) aggression between people in
relationships.
• Relational aggression is a form of aggression
where “the group” is used as a weapon to
assault others and others' relationships.
• It uses lies, secrets, betrayals and other
dishonest tactics to destroy or damage the
relationships and social standing of others in the
group.
The Female Bully
• Bullying Most Strongly Affects Women
– Women are targeted by bullies more
frequently (in 57% of cases), especially by
other women (in 71% of cases).
» Zogby Internation Report, 2007
The Female Bully
Subtle, sly, tactful, and covert
• Spreading vicious rumors within the
workplace
• Attempting to control and manipulate other
co-workers, affecting their relationship with
the target.
• Purposely hurting the reputation of the
target by way of rumor, innuendo and lies
The Female Bully
• Cold shoulder, eye rolls, refusing to
communicate with the target.
• Gang Up Syndrome: Bully attempts to
turn all co-workers against the target.
» Tanenbaum, L. Cat Fight, 2002
Examples of Indirect Aggression
Social sabotage gossip and vague
double meanings…..
Your supervisor pats you on the back and
says:
• “Your report is excellent. I am so glad you
were able to understand the assignment.
*************************************
Your co-worker exclaims:
*Oh, you have lost twenty pounds. How
wonderful! Are you going to lose the rest?
Consequences of Workplace
Bullying
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Increased Absenteeism
Low morale amongst organization
Open hostility
High Turnover
Decreased productivity
Loss of efficiency
Possible violence in the workplace
Probable litigation between employees and/or
employer
Consequences of Workplace
Bullying
• Loss of accumulated wisdom and
experience
• Possibility of poor public workplace image
“Bad PR.”
How to Prevent Workplace Abuse
• Do not accept: deceit, selfishness,
inequality, cruelty, disregard in workplace
relationships. “That’s mean.”
• Recognize co-workers for who and what
they are. Identify blamers, rationalizers,
conquerors, manipulators, performers and
dehumanize their motivations.
How to Prevent Workplace Abuse
• Be aware of “Gotcha Goals.”
• Be conscious of institutional “set ups,” in
which the objective is discipline rather than
improvement.
How to Prevent Workplace Abuse
• Look around and reach out! Establish peer
support, build relationships with targets of
workplace abuse. Do NOT isolate, ignore the
target, or play into the bully’s game!
• Watch yourself. Be aware of your own
behaviors towards co-workers. Identify if you do
participate in the abuse of another. BREAK THE
CYCLE OF ABUSE!!
Intervention for Emotional Abuse
• Solicit support from family and
friends…folks that really believe you when
you say you are being emotionally abused
in your workplace.
• Use FMLA Leave to protect your health
and get distance from the bully. Seek
medical attention and EPA Counseling.
Intervention for Emotional Abuse
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Solicit witness statements. This is KEY.
File a Formal Complaint with the HR Dept.
Confront the person who is your bully.
Prepare a case against the
person…Document, document, document.
• Take your case public.
What Employees Should Do
• Stand by the target. Especially following a
closed door meeting.
• Refuse to betray/deceive a co-worker.
Siding with the bully only brings “short
term immunity.”
• Be present. Offer to be a witness or
representative for your co-worker.
What Employees Should Do
• Provide testimony at hearings, arbitrations,
and mediation. This can be a written or inperson testimony.
• Use GROUP tactics/strategies. Approach
the bully, HR, the boss or bosses, as a
UNIFIED GROUP. Solidarity. There is
“strength in numbers.”
Establishing Healthy Workplaces
• Create a Workplace Civility Policy
A Zero Tolerance for Bully Behavior Work
Zone.
Behaviors such as abrasive behavior,
discrediting a co-worker, abusive or
disrespectful verbal behavior, physical
AND/OR emotional isolation ARE NOT
tolerated.
Establishing Healthy Workplaces
• Healthy Leadership Styles
Leaders set the tone. It DOES begin at the top!
Healthy leadership helps to eliminate conflict
and harassment in the workplace.
Managers vrs. Leaders
• Hire employees and leaders with Emotional
Intelligence.
• When hiring new employees and leaders,
emphasize cooperation, respect, and conflict
resolution skills!
Establishing Healthy Workplaces
• Build Trust and Compassion in the
Workplace
• Employees must feel safe when reporting
emotional abuse in the workplace. Create
opportunities during employee reviews to
recognize workplace abuse. Use a survey
to gather information on workplace culture.
Establishing Healthy Workplaces
• Post Anti Bullying Posters in the
workplace, i.e. lunchroom, main office, etc.
• Have 360 evaluations. Everyone
evaluates everyone else!!!
Bills, Labor Standards and Policies
• Bill 70-2001 Legislative Assembly of Ontario,
Canada
• California Legislature-2004 Regular Session
Assembly Bill No. 1582
• Pleasant Valley, CA School District Policy
• State of Oregon, Dept of Environmental Quality
Anti Mobbing Policy No. 50.110
• Several US Healthy Workplace Bills that have
been heard in State Legislatures. None has
passed as of today.
It’s a Job, NOT a Jail
• NO job is worth losing your life,
your health or your personal
integrity!
• “Those who can, do;
Those who can’t bully.”
Tim Field, Author
Bully In Sight
Video Clips
ABC Good Morning Show and
The NY Times
• http://video.nytimes.com/video/2008/03/24
/health/1194817094771/my-boss-was-abully.html?scp=1&sq=Workplace%20Bully
&st=cse
» 3 minutes /6 seconds
• http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/TakeControl
OfYourLife/story?id=4526313&page=1
» 5 mins/24 seconds